The day has come

[brokenwingangel]

About 2 months ago I wrote in I had decided to stop taking my script of oxycontin 60 mg prescribed 4 x a day. I wanted to do subs, but couldn't find a doc in my area. I decided just to taper off my final pills and have slowly tapered off to 1/4 of a pill every 5 hours. Last night was my last 1/4, I took an eighth and another eighth this morning. Needless to say the sweats and cramps have already started, a bit of relief now due to the 1/8 this morning. all I have now is a few (about 4) xanax, couple of hydros, couple of percocets. I remember the reciepr Robert 325 gave me, but for some reason, i cannot get a note to him at all. (Site keeps asking for password, tried to change it, maybe my computer). I just need to know how much further I will fall, being as i have been tapering? I hate the feeling of withdrawal, but I am leaning on my Faith to rid myself of this terrible addiction. Even not abusing them, I still thought about them every moment of the day, to make sure I had them at hand. I can not wait to finally break the chain, but I am frightened of the unknown. Please .... if u have been where I am now, let me know what is in store and how long this itch will continue! May God Bless Us.

[doc.rose]

Just hang in there! You have come so far!! I am not an addict so I don't know what you are feeling but someone on the forum will. But, you are nearly free of the demon! Just stay strong. You can do this!!

[no_more_tram]

Good for you having the power and strength to taper. I would not. I would give in and just have to go cold turkey. Even though I am on my millionth time of cold turkey I must say that you have the fact that you were able to taper on your side. Now all I believe you have to do, is keep on doing what you were mentally to help throught he tapering. Even though I have relapsed so many times, and don't have advice from a sober mind. I do know that you are well on your way, and like me I am going through the withdrawls to, and it sucks but that's a part of getting clean, right? You shouldn't be near as bad since you have given your body time to taper. So you do have that on your side. I wish you the best of luck, and keep posting. My problem was that I stopped posting and I do believe that posting really helps us to stay clean. Even though I have only had short periods of staying clean, I do know that keeping up with posting and venting and of course reading other people's posts has helped. Although I don't recommend taking any of the percs, and I know that the xanax are on the Thomas recipe so I guess if you follow it, and only have four then you shouldn't have a problem getting hooked on those. I am going cold turkey and although the anxiety is overwhelming I know that if It would onlt be worse to replace my addiction for something else, so I have no choice but to go at it this way, but it helps other's taking a benzo like xanax. As long as it's not for a long period of time, and you maybe just stay at taking the four that you have. Again, I'm no expert at the Thomas Recipe because I have personally never done it, I have always done cold turkey!!

[ARTIST658]

Dear Angel,

I have been where you are - so I feel I can speak to you from "the other side." It's all worth it - I promise you. You have spared yourself a lot of discomfort by tapering so much - and I don't think the withdrawal is going to be that bad. I can't exactly specify what it will be like for you - as there is no standard to look to for guidance.

The most powerful weapon you have in your favor is your faith, dear friend. That is a powerful tool right now - and always. Trust that God will help you through every minute of this withdrawal. What you are doing is exactly as He would want. And sometimes, the worse it is, the better your chances for recovery. If it goes too easily, we are too quick to fall back into the pills again.

I can not begin to tell you how much better your life is going to be - without pills. Saying so only sounds trite - but I believe it from the depth of my soul. I sought joy and peace through pills for years... and I had no idea that I would only find it AFTER I put the pills down, and started on this path of recovery. I didn't know how much of life I was missing out on!

I know you are full of fear right now - that "fear of the unknown" is tremendous. I felt it, too - as most of us do. We have no idea what to expect. We fear how "bad" the withdrawal is going to be - and then, the prospect of spending our lives "drug-free" sounds nothing less than overwhelming. To be honest, I fully expected that life would we be outright boring without the pills! For me, pills had become a part of almost anything I did... and I thought that the pills were the one thing making my life bearable. If I was sad, I took a pill - if I was angry, I took a pill - heck, if I was happy, I took a pill -- I didn't know any other way of living.

Let me assure you... there is tremendous HOPE in your future. When we're medicated, we lose the full spectrum of emotions - everything we feel is in a haze. We also lose perspective of how much joy there is in life - how much we have to be grateful for, how much beauty there is around us. All of that awakens as we distance ourselves from the pills. It's nothing short of miraculous, if you ask me...

Please post as you go along - I'll be happy to respond if you have any questions or need help. I'm excited for you, as all of LIFE is ahead for you. May God bless you in your journey.

Hugs,
Ruth

[TTTDogs]

Angel,

Jut a short post - but wanted to chime in and say how pruod I am of you ---- and how much I believe you CAN do this.....

And PLEASE heed the advice of ARTIST - Ruth ------ she was my "angel" during my horrific detox and she and others brought me through - you are so fortunate to have her support - she is full of wisdom and words of encouragement and comfort - WE are all here for you my dear ----- and let's get busy at fixing your wing!

I'll be back later and post again - we are here - do NOT give up!


Ruth, I will email you later...missed you .... GREAT post as always!
HUGS TTT

[brokenwingangel]

Thank u so much for reply. I read ur posts before I posted abd they gave me so much courage, I was glad to hear from u. My kids are having Christmas tonight and I hate my target day is now, but I will be so glad to get over this stuff. I will be in touch....it is good to have you all to talk to. Thanks....Jacki

[newyorkgal]

Jacki, you've taken the first step and everyone here can relate and is so proud of you. It's really a good time to stop, right before New Years. Your new year, 2010, can be a different one, free of opiates, better for you and the kids. You've accomplished so much already and come so far... Just keep it up. You'll be so glad you do... We're proud !!
Merry Christmas and Seasons Greeting from NYC
NYG

[doc.rose]

Hi Jacki! Just checking in to see how you are doing! Please post an update!

[Robert_325]

About 2 months ago I wrote in I had decided to stop taking my script of oxycontin 60 mg prescribed 4 x a day. I wanted to do subs, but couldn't find a doc in my area. I decided just to taper off my final pills and have slowly tapered off to 1/4 of a pill every 5 hours. Last night was my last 1/4, I took an eighth and another eighth this morning. Needless to say the sweats and cramps have already started, a bit of relief now due to the 1/8 this morning. all I have now is a few (about 4) xanax, couple of hydros, couple of percocets. I remember the reciepr Robert 325 gave me, but for some reason, i cannot get a note to him at all. (Site keeps asking for password, tried to change it, maybe my computer). I just need to know how much further I will fall, being as i have been tapering? I hate the feeling of withdrawal, but I am leaning on my Faith to rid myself of this terrible addiction. Even not abusing them, I still thought about them every moment of the day, to make sure I had them at hand. I can not wait to finally break the chain, but I am frightened of the unknown. Please .... if u have been where I am now, let me know what is in store and how long this itch will continue! May God Bless Us.

I have been ill from having a blood clot. Haven't been on the forum recently. The recipe you were looking for is the Thomas Recipe for opiate w/d. It will help you a lot. Here is a link. Hope it helps. God bless.

http://www.drugs.com/forum/featured-...wal-35169.html