Day 8-i know it gets better but could use encouragement

[cryin out]

the emotional part is really hard !! I have been staying busy as i can but too spacey to work all week at my really taxing consignment store. So working at home maki g soap has helped. In some ways i feel rather useless. I cry sometimes for a few seconds. Been taking care of my three kids myself the entire time so i should feel proud in many ways but just in some ways i feel lost.
I have tried lyrica in small doses to try to even myself out but it only works a wee bit. Day 5 and day 7 being my most difficult days either physically or psychologically. I want to stop the lyrica so that i wont have that addiction so will probably start tomorrow with half dose and wrk down. I have an appt with the visceral manipulation practitioners that have done such a good work with my pain it gave me hope to get off opiates in the first place. Only 2 days out of 8 where the pain was bothersome with otc's and icy hot (today is one of them)

On good days there is joy and gladness and i have an underlying sense of happy just not living under the slavery of opiates and my lack of control.

In truth, i miss that morning dose to get me outta pain and revved up to work. It feels like something is missing.

And drug dreams last night. Took a good dose of melatonin and dreamed all night of pills i think...lol

Blessings to you all.

[Lost_soldier]

Cryin,
I know you can do this, you already 8 days in thats great! I'm on..... Day 1! So 28 hours after my last dose and I'm scared of what to come. But seeing your still alive is comforting (figuratively speaking) it's going to be a long road but I've filled up the tank and packed lunches!

[HumHun]

Cryin Out
I wish so much that I could take part of the misery for you. I have one month and 10 days clean (cept for the one norco) and I will be honest it was a month before I felt absolutely 100% and at times I still don't. I also will tell you that people started noticing a difference in me at about 2 weeks. I still have my original pain and I have been doing everything to get rid of it. Ibuprofen 800 does help but does not take it away. And I still have tiredness issues that is the worst for me AND I still cry once in awhile over a stupid commercial. I also love the feeling of being without drugs it is amazing and I can actually laugh, talk and enjoy being aroung people. PLEAE hang in there it does get better. One of the things i still do is go back and read old posts from people similar to me who have been there and done that. For some reason it brings me comfort. Read Melinda 7.5 she documents daily (way back in fall 2008) hers was the first post I read and I identified more with her partner in detox but It gave me hope to hang in there. There are a lot of people on today that chronicle their journeys one to three years ago . I am sure you have read a lot already and I am preaching to the choir. I hope this week brings great changes for you.

[cryin out]

Thank you Ruthie so very much. I thought i turned the corner day 4 then day 6 but still plugging along with up and downs. On my phone it is hard to get around as eay as the computer but when at work it was melindas journey that gave me hope addict to addict so to speak when my heart was really saying to get off norco i sought her out here in fact. But robert had posted of his dr visit and i just wanted to give them a break so i kept reading and reading to try and give them space to help all the sub people. Man there are alot of sub needs these days. Hurt for all of us. Opiates made me feel amazing and that is lost now. But i also puked plenty doing to much and i was a stone wall that avoided everyone toward the end. It felt that way anyway.

Thanks for sharing your experience to give me a bit more hope today hunny

[HumHun]

Thank you Ruthie so very much. I thought i turned the corner day 4 then day 6 but still plugging along with up and downs. On my phone it is hard to get around as eay as the computer but when at work it was melindas journey that gave me hope addict to addict so to speak when my heart was really saying to get off norco i sought her out here in fact. But robert had posted of his dr visit and i just wanted to give them a break so i kept reading and reading to try and give them space to help all the sub people. Man there are alot of sub needs these days. Hurt for all of us. Opiates made me feel amazing and that is lost now. But i also puked plenty doing to much and i was a stone wall that avoided everyone toward the end. It felt that way anyway.

Thanks for sharing your experience to give me a bit more hope today hunny

Cryin
Couple more things: When I first joined I didn't get a lot of people responding but I got exactly what I needed. I had 3 people hang with me and help me and (Ggeo, NoMoreOxy and Marian) other people would respond occasionally and always with perfect timing and just what I needed. I lurked on this board for 3 years before I got serious enough to take the plunge forever. I did make it 10 days in 2008 since then I detoxed more times than I can say but always blew it by the 2nd to 4th day. Detoxing is so hard for me to do. I wasn't doing oxy or really hard opiates just vicoden 5/500 or norco 10/325 but my final detaox last month was pure misery. I live daily afraid I will fall back and have to do it again. It is hard living with pain and I miss the first cup of coffee with 6 or 7 vics to start my day. I have read that Robert can hold opiates in his hand with a hatred for them (my paraphrasing) and thiat is my goal. I don't read alot of his posts cause he is the SUB DUDE and I have no access to subs or I would have tries it. I am gonna go read you journey.
PS NoMoreOxy is on his honeymoon and I am sure you will meet him

[cryin out]

For the second time my kids watched 127 hours. I took them to canyonland utah for their spring break and i quit tobacco and began mu lyrica taper at that time. When we were there we heard to story of what happened to arin ralston so we came home and got the movie. My heart was heavy looking ahead at widdling away hydro so i did not watch it much then. Today i did and the tears poured out uncontrollably. Maybe a wonderful thing to consider my suffering is nothing like his!!! And maybe those tears were needed to help heal the reason i felt dependent on medication. I dunno but thanx for hangin with my Ruthie

[HumHun]

For the second time my kids watched 127 hours. I took them to canyonland utah for their spring break and i quit tobacco and began mu lyrica taper at that time. When we were there we heard to story of what happened to arin ralston so we came home and got the movie. My heart was heavy looking ahead at widdling away hydro so i did not watch it much then. Today i did and the tears poured out uncontrollably. Maybe a wonderful thing to consider my suffering is nothing like his!!! And maybe those tears were needed to help heal the reason i felt dependent on medication. I dunno but thanx for hangin with my Ruthie

I really enjoyed that movie, I like your attitude, my mother died 2 years ago and I am so sad for my step dad he is so lonely, I also watch tv shows on IDI Discovery about missing people etc. Point of my story is while detoxing and thinking about friends that i have who have bigger problems than me or watching tru life shows about people really hurting it really diminished my own problems. I would think along the same lines that you were thinking and sometimes feel ashamed that I was feeling so sorry for myself. After the first few days of detoxing I actually made a bucket list and tomorrow I am fulfiling one of them. (iI am 51 so I am old) I also wrote a two columned list of the good and the bad in my life and i have a lot of things to live for. I am a backslidden ex-preachers wife and I am confused about my life, God and my future. Not doing opiates has made me get on the ball and start making better chioces in my life.
TTYL

[cryin out]

Was a hardcore christian from 16 until about 5 years ago (I am 45) I was so tired of seeing life through such a narrow way and being taught to condemn others for their choices. Ugh enough is enough I said. I was in so much pain I left my husband, came to the mountains and have lived here 3 years. But I did not die as I thought....lol so had to provide for my kids and did real well for 2 years until last year when I go hurt again just doing normal work. That is when I had to get on opiates.
Today I am physcially hurting and wondering how on earth I will overcome this but I have to trust a little longer. And also reconsidering the relationship I have with my husband because I am so tired trying to work 2 jobs and be a mom.
So I totally know where you are at in your thinking. For sure. I hope we both take the path we are suppose to.

[shybaybe2003]

be very careful of the Lyrica. I am so glad you are tapering off of that.I was on that years ago, and i used it to help with withdrawals. Unfortunately I ended increasing my use to dangerous amounts. Robert was trying to get me to see what a dumba*s I was being, but thats the whole point, I was a dumba*ss and couldnt see, or wouldnt see I should say. But when I got off the lyrica ( I was taking like 500-600 mg at a time, like 4 times a day, I went thru sevfere withdrawals. Almost reminded me of the withdrawals i went thru getting off the subs. SO def be careful of lyrica. Day 8 is a good day, because it can only get better from here.

[HumHun]

Was a hardcore christian from 16 until about 5 years ago (I am 45) I was so tired of seeing life through such a narrow way and being taught to condemn others for their choices. Ugh enough is enough I said. I was in so much pain I left my husband, came to the mountains and have lived here 3 years. But I did not die as I thought....lol so had to provide for my kids and did real well for 2 years until last year when I go hurt again just doing normal work. That is when I had to get on opiates.
Today I am physcially hurting and wondering how on earth I will overcome this but I have to trust a little longer. And also reconsidering the relationship I have with my husband because I am so tired trying to work 2 jobs and be a mom.
So I totally know where you are at in your thinking. For sure. I hope we both take the path we are suppose to.

Soon after I divorced my preacher husband I remarried a person totally opposite of him he is an ex gang banger but holds onto the past. I wish I would have waited for someone in-between. I do believe in God but that is about all I will take of it. Like I said I am confused, but detoxing made me think about God for the first time in mucho years. I still physically hurt too but to be honest it is not as bad as it could be. I pretty much have done drugs straight since my divorce and this is the first time in years I have been clean. I got arrested for smoking crack when I was 42 I made the local papers cause this is a tiny rural area all the christians I knew were blown away and I was judged harshly. Oh well they have not walked in my shoes and I haven't walked in theirs. I can only watch out for myself.

[cryin out]

Ru still with the gang guy and is he supportive of your clean time? I married the crackhead first then the preachers kid.,,lol. Opposite as you. But for sure i felt so close to god when coming to this forum reading your stories even before i jumped.
As one would jump i would pray for them so much and cry because i understood the agony. Been a long time since i felt so close to the masciline god. Then i jumped and through those first days when one has to overcome panic attacks i made my
Peace with jesus. But had to also drive by a river yesterday and lay in the grass through our brief spell of sunshine and smell the dirt and sprawl out and touch the feminine. Went to work briefly and still had some norco there. Like quarter of a pill. I was in pain but did not succumb. Spent 16 bucks on dmso to tru for pain. I did up my ibipeofen to 800 like you and i think it helped me enough to clear out our storage room

[HumHun]

I am still mariied to the dude!! I divorced preacher dude in 1998 I moved in with other guy in 1999. Married him in jail in 2002 cause he was on his way to prison and I knew no conjicals if we weren't married. By the time 1999 was ending I was a full fledged crackhead. I smoked it until I went to jail for it. Mind you I worked at the time for the Federal Gov't and had a second job at a credit union. I functioned barely during these jobs for the last 3 years of them. I got out of jail and quit doing drugs for 3 years until 2005 then I started the vic habit which spiraled out of control. As far as suppotive his ex wife is a heroin addict and he thinks that vics and all those opiates are smaller versions of heroin and he is repulsed by them and only understanding to a point. I didn't tell him about the vics until 2 weeks after detoxing. He thinks right now I should be perfectly normal. We also are from 2 different cultures and that can be difficult. he is Korean and I am white but let me say this I can make a great pot of rice and I don't even like it. Most of the time he is a good guy. I won't drive his car cause he bumps music still and I personally feel like an idiot driving his vehicle cause it won't turn off the bump. So I guess to be honest until the end of my other marriage I was much happier. So much for that confusion I was talking about.

[Lost_soldier]

Cryin,
Thinking about ya today, hope all is well. Day 9 now right? Your doing awesome! Keep fighting and try to get out and do something for you today

[Lost_soldier]

hey cryin,
Just checking in on you? How are you feeling? Did working help take your mind off of it? I'm going on 77 hours now clean and man o man, what a fight this is

[HumHun]

hey cryin,
Just checking in on you? How are you feeling? Did working help take your mind off of it? I'm going on 77 hours now clean and man o man, what a fight this is

Hi Lost
I am so glad you hit the 72 hour mark. For the first month I counted hours even into over 1000 I have a month and almost 2 weeks clean and today it is raining hard and I feel like taking somethng just to alleve the pain. Ibutprofin does help a lot (never thought I would say that) Congrats on reaching the third day.

Cryin!!
how are you hope you are hanging in there today PLease let us know!!

[cryin out]

I have been thinking of both of you!!!! Soldier boy i hope you are doing well!

I have a setback which is why i dis no have the heart to post esp lost soldier in detox. I could not function with the pelvic pain raging. Even with a few
Months of alternative therapies i am not sure i have made progress at all. So i am back on low dose pain med to function. I cried for hours as i had made it 9 days. But those last 2 were bad. I went in for a checkup today and spoke with my doc about my goals.

How i hope and pray i do not cause anuone to become discouraged!!!! I also want to remain part of this forum for accountability as well as support. But can i be of any help to anyone or will i hurt people? I wanted to write yesterday so bad but so many in detox my heart was to sad to. When the pain is this bad it usually takes a couple days for things to be more comfortable so i still am not able to do much but basic stuff.

One thing i have noticed is how messed up the nervous system is after meds. I cannot still drink coffee like i use to pre withdrawals and my awareness right now is huge. Lol
My kid just had an amazing performance at school and
that lifted my spirits!!!

How r u Ruthie? Do you know the source of your pain?
I wish i could help somehow. I cannot even help myself. Tests never show really what is wrong but cancer made this 45 year old more like 75. I wont give up though!!! My ex does music ar celebrate recovery and i am considering going esp since i have a setback. It seems good for robert and melinda and some others. I am scared tho an i think you mighr understand why from our previous talks.So what is your pain from sweetie?




Lost soldier, you are still in my prayers and thoughts. Thank you for being an inspiration!!! I hope you are well and that all you love will be healed.

[Lost_soldier]

Hey cryin,
I'm so sorry that you had to take your medication as I know how determined you were; and maybe still are?, but if your are in legitimate pain then that is what they are meant for. As long as your not abusing them!!! I wish more than anything i could bare your physical pain for you as my pain tolerance threshold is pretty high. I would in a heartbeat. I'm at almost 89 hours now. I dont know if you have been reading my thread (doesn't get much attention but I just read others) but ive been having a pretty rough time but the plus on my side is that although i took them for the right reasons after first deployment (got blown up lol VBIED) after the pain was gone it ls been all recreational so unlike you i dont feel.... What's the best way to say it.... Physical pain from pre existing medical conditions?!?! I know how much you wanted this, and can still obtain it after you find alternative methods to treat your pain. Your words and care are more support than anyone could ever hope for. No one here will (or better not because I'll throw them a good ol' US army ??? Whoopin!) judge you just please keep posting and supporting as much as Possible!!! I find comfort in other people caring and it really helps! Especially you,'I've read ALLOT of your post on other peoples thread and they are very motivational. (were all about motivation in the army [false motivation too lol]) i hope your still awake to read this before bed somyou can get a good night sleep with you mind at ease that your friends here are still here. Please post back qnd keep posting. In my opinion if it's for a good reason and you need them to improve your quality of life for a legitamite medical reason then that's what their for cryin. Smile and drive on to keep on keepin On


God bless
*B

[Lost_soldier]

Hi Lost
I am so glad you hit the 72 hour mark. For the first month I counted hours even into over 1000 I have a month and almost 2 weeks clean and today it is raining hard and I feel like taking somethng just to alleve the pain. Ibutprofin does help a lot (never thought I would say that) Congrats on reaching the third day.

Cryin!!
how are you hope you are hanging in there today PLease let us know!!

Hum,
I absolutely and completely missed this post from you!! I'm on this board all day reading and somehow missed it lol. Thank you!!! I'm at 89 hours!! At 0730 I'll be at 96 hours (cenral time U.S) I hope all is well with you. And wow 6 weeks!! I cannot wait to be there!

[HumHun]

Don't leave the board no matter what you are doing. I so understand pain. I have emphysema, arthritis and bursitis in my left hip. I wake up every morning in pain.To be honest when I did pain pills when I woke up the pain was excruciating (sp?) now it is a lot less. I posted elsewhere that I broke down and took one norco and I felt so guilty. But it was so nice to have a couple hours of pain relief. IF it weren't for my lungs I would continue to take meds for pain but I lose all control I usually eat 6 or 7 with a cup of coffee in the morning and I LOVE IT!!!!. I overdosed in 2008 and was in ICU for 9 days breathing artificially. With emphysema opiates inhibit your breathing even more. I know if I continue using I will die. My body can handle a low dose of pain meds but I go out of control with them so I have no choice but to quit. No mattter where you are now or even in the days to come you are welcome here. This is a great place and I know that if I blow it I will be here anyway. I am just one step from blowing it everyday. Please let me know what your plan is even if you go whole hog or decide to stay on a low dose. People here honestly do care.

[Ggeo]

Don't know what happened but I posted to you yesterday and now it's gone. Really weird. I think someone out there is mad at me! Anyway, please please don't beat yourself up about having to take some meds. You didn't mention what or how much. Did the Drs have a plan at all? I'm am ....10 days clean( I think) of Oxycodone now and 6 days into my fast and doing pretty well, and am finding myself hardly coming here any more and I decided I don't just want to drop out of sight. I remember the depression I felt when I was struggling and folks disappeared. Even though my method of getting off opiates THIS TIME is unconventional I know opiate addiction, and have now quit opiates 4 times, each time a different way. I know the agony of cold turkey ( made it one month before relapsing), tapering, Catapres patches, Clonidine pills, The Thomas Recipe, and finally Gabapentin. Please keep posting here! No matter what! I slunk back here two or three times with my tail between my legs and could never have made it (again) without this forum. PS HumHun! Another glimpse into your life! Funny how our rebound men are always the opposite of our previous man isn't it?( I learned this lesson early.) StayCo, hope to hear from you today.

[HumHun]

Don't know what happened but I posted to you yesterday and now it's gone. Really weird. I think someone out there is mad at me! Anyway, please please don't beat yourself up about having to take some meds. You didn't mention what or how much. Did the Drs have a plan at all? I'm am ....10 days clean( I think) of Oxycodone now and 6 days into my fast and doing pretty well, and am finding myself hardly coming here any more and I decided I don't just want to drop out of sight. I remember the depression I felt when I was struggling and folks disappeared. Even though my method of getting off opiates THIS TIME is unconventional I know opiate addiction, and have now quit opiates 4 times, each time a different way. I know the agony of cold turkey ( made it one month before relapsing), tapering, Catapres patches, Clonidine pills, The Thomas Recipe, and finally Gabapentin. Please keep posting here! No matter what! I slunk back here two or three times with my tail between my legs and could never have made it (again) without this forum. PS HumHun! Another glimpse into your life! Funny how our rebound men are always the opposite of our previous man isn't it?( I learned this lesson early.) StayCo, hope to hear from you today.

Not to hijack someone elses thread but want you to know I miss yakkin at ya I'm gonna find one of our threads and write you

[cryin out]

Thinking of you guys!!! Still having pain but the edge is taken off a bit by the medicine. I hope today it gets better. Thank you for being there for me. I feel so caught up in a mess of wanting to not live on drugs to needing them. I know i could easily take more than prescribed maybe even to ease the sadness in my heart about my physical problems and that is why i want to be here.
I have delivered 7 children naturally and 4 of them myself at home. I thought i was was pretty tough against pain but i am not.

Ggeo i dont want to go back to lyrica. That med scares me!!! Did your doc feel it was a bit easier on the body or is it because it is less expensive?

Soldier i am going to check the board to see how you are and i am thinking if you with prayers. And ruthie, shyla, ggeo, reid, and the others that so kindly breathed strength into me. You all are part of my life now.

Now that i know my body is still a mess i am really reevaluating my life. I live in the mountains of wyoming and the long winters may be an issue.
It would be good to bounce ideas off people from time to time unrelated to meds
Have a wonderful day everyone!!!

[Robert_325]

Thinking of you guys!!! Still having pain but the edge is taken off a bit by the medicine. I hope today it gets better. Thank you for being there for me. I feel so caught up in a mess of wanting to not live on drugs to needing them. I know i could easily take more than prescribed maybe even to ease the sadness in my heart about my physical problems and that is why i want to be here.
I have delivered 7 children naturally and 4 of them myself at home. I thought i was was pretty tough against pain but i am not.

Ggeo i dont want to go back to lyrica. That med scares me!!! Did your doc feel it was a bit easier on the body or is it because it is less expensive?

Soldier i am going to check the board to see how you are and i am thinking if you with prayers. And ruthie, shyla, ggeo, reid, and the others that so kindly breathed strength into me. You all are part of my life now.

Now that i know my body is still a mess i am really reevaluating my life. I live in the mountains of wyoming and the long winters may be an issue.
It would be good to bounce ideas off people from time to time unrelated to meds
Have a wonderful day everyone!!!

Cryin Out ..... We really haven't spoken personally about your issues in detail. You mention having 7 children and that you also live in the mountains of Wyoming. I used to moderate a web site for autoimmune diseases years ago for a long time before I was led to this forum. I have lots of experience in that area of medical problems.

It's very common for women to suffer severe pain after bearing several children especially when they live in extreme environments like the cold you are living in. If you've mentioned autoimmune problems previously I've missed it. But that is my real area of expertise. Can you tell me what kind of problems specifically you are having? Be as specific as you are able if you are comfortable with doing so.

The Lyrica you talk about leads me to believe you may have either been diagnosed with Fibromayalgia, as that is a common use for Lyrica, or one of a few other autoimmune problems. At least I have a feeling your dr may have had that suspicion about you giving you the Lyrica. Just an educated guess on my part. Talk to me, perhaps I can help you. I also suffer with four autoimmune disorders myself. Hope that I can help you. I can help with lots more than just suboxone tapers. God bless.

[ClassiqueMom]

crying out..

just a quick note to let you know, i will be praying for you through-out the day, today..

[cryin out]

Classique Mom, thanks for popping on the board and praying for people. I feel like I have a guardian angel when you show up...lol

Robert, thank you so much.
Well, you are so right the climate here is intense to say the least. I am an herbologist, and summer here is so glorious and I spend as much time studying plants. Last year my body crashed and I was not even able to get out to harvest or study and I felt as though the only thing that brings me joy was taken away.
After suffering to walk all hunched over and wondering if I should buy a cane, I went to see the doc and went on hydro's and got my life back.
When the pain began last summer I had this internal ultrasound, and a couple years before I had a CT scan for the same pain, and nothing could be found.
I am a cancer survivor and next week is my fifth year check up(they say if you make it 5 years you are cured)
This year has been the hardest pain wise though...scary at times wondering if there was a recurring tumor.
I spent some time searching my heart and praying and inside, I feel I am cured. I think the pain I feel is maybe a result of radiation.
My doctor also feels that an MRI would be good to have, but he already sees how I struggle to support my family and that I have medical debt already. In fact he is so kind to me, he does not charge me half the time I have an appt.

He suggested Lyrica because he thinks I have nerve damage creating the pain.
Lyrica did help at first with the hydros but then I still had pain. I watched a friend go through a very long wd from Lyrica and I began to taper and am off completely since last week. (I used a few times during my detox but pain got too bad again so I could not work and went on the hydro again but without lyrica)

I also have symptoms of interstitial cystitis on occassion, but that has got better since I use mucilagenous herbs in my diet when I have pain in the bladder.
It is the pelvic pain I suffer with, almost like I cannot keep my body upright and it hurts through my butt cheeks though my thighs and anywhere in between.

Even back on hydros I have alot of pain. Usually it takes a couple days to calm down after a bad pain spell, but it has been 5 days and still hurtin bad, but the medicine takes the edge off so I can work and tend my family.
Been prayin alot and reading the board everyday and I dont plan to stop coming here so that I make friends with people that understand this issue and can help me stay accountable so I dont overdo my pills.
I have had alternative massage therapies done that has helped alot.

Ya know one of the things that is hardest for me is that pain creates a sadness in me...an almost despair in which that is probably why I took more pills this winter. Dark cold intense winter, along with pain, and feeling in despair. I wanted to numb my pain away. HAd someone living with me that got oxy's and methadones alot. I was trying to help them out, so instead of paying me, well I got pills. That person left my house a few weeks ago so that helps

I am only 45. I have 5 grandkids, still raising 3 of my children that are under 18. I dont go to bars, dont date...just work and see friends on occassion (more in summer, we camp and things). I hope to have a long life ahead of me.

I have read that you still have some health things going on. How are you doing? Thank you for your work of service here on the forum and you are so quiet about your own problems....maybe people dont ever consider that you have your own battles and that you are managing without opiates. You are amazing as is your other half

So I guess to answer your question, yes I am treated for fibromyalgia because nobody really knows what the problem is save probably nerve damage.

I have my cancer appt on Wednesday and it will take a week or so to find out the results so I may be an emotional wreck this week, but will keep reading here to manage without taking a bunch of pills. I truly only want to take what I need to keep me working both jobs( 7.5's 4 times per day which has never taken all the pain away, but does totally take the edge off so I feel the pain but not panic or crawl around because I cannot hold myself up)
Thanks for asking about it all. I hope you have a wonderful weekend with Melinda and we have sunshine!! WOO HOO I think this has been the longest winter I remember. It was snowing a couple days ago even (although does not stick on the ground)
Love and Blessings
Kris

[ClassiqueMom]

just some quick thoughts to let you know i'm here.. thinking about you..

you are dearer now, having read your story.. pretty amazing person, you are!
and far stronger than i think you give yourself credit for..

just a random thought.. lately, i have read, here, there.. or "just happen to come across" an article about inflammation..

it sure seems that inflammation is something that causes a huge myriad of problems.. and i'm beginning to see that "inflammation" is not just what i'd always had this "vague idea" of ..

i think proper types of food are so much more important that i'd ever realized..

different things i've read lately that i need to research to understand better, there are foods called "night shade" foods, that i think can contribute to inflammation ???

also, i know and truly believe vitamin C .. and vitamin D are hugely important to our bodies' well being..

now, it seems to me, that alllll of a sudden, we here soooo much about vitamin D that the "sceptic" in me, says: "yeah! they just wanna sell more vitamin D"

but.. today, again, I happened upon an article that blamed chronic pain on lack of vitamin d.. guess why .. because of it's effect on "inflammation" ..

and who? (at least in my part of the country) gets enough of sunshine? (a great source for vitamin d) ..

personally, i suffer from an auto immune disease, that is worsened by the sun..
go figure..

soo.. i've started a taking oral vitamin d.. not sure if it will make a difference in my physical well being, but, thought i'd try none-the-less..

crying out, maybe? having computer access, some of the things i've mentioned would be something for you to search about???

yeah! i know! in your spare time, right?

well, i don't mean to interrupt your conversation w/Robert.. i really! just wanted to let you know, you remain in my thoughts and prayers!

Classique MoM

ohhh.. and anything we "might" find that helps us feel better (naturally), surely doesn't work over night..
sooo, keep plugging away! hour by hour .. day by day.. there is always! hope!

[Robert_325]

Classique Mom, thanks for popping on the board and praying for people. I feel like I have a guardian angel when you show up...lol

Robert, thank you so much.
Well, you are so right the climate here is intense to say the least. I am an herbologist, and summer here is so glorious and I spend as much time studying plants. Last year my body crashed and I was not even able to get out to harvest or study and I felt as though the only thing that brings me joy was taken away.
After suffering to walk all hunched over and wondering if I should buy a cane, I went to see the doc and went on hydro's and got my life back.
When the pain began last summer I had this internal ultrasound, and a couple years before I had a CT scan for the same pain, and nothing could be found.
I am a cancer survivor and next week is my fifth year check up(they say if you make it 5 years you are cured)
This year has been the hardest pain wise though...scary at times wondering if there was a recurring tumor.
I spent some time searching my heart and praying and inside, I feel I am cured. I think the pain I feel is maybe a result of radiation.
My doctor also feels that an MRI would be good to have, but he already sees how I struggle to support my family and that I have medical debt already. In fact he is so kind to me, he does not charge me half the time I have an appt.

He suggested Lyrica because he thinks I have nerve damage creating the pain.
Lyrica did help at first with the hydros but then I still had pain. I watched a friend go through a very long wd from Lyrica and I began to taper and am off completely since last week. (I used a few times during my detox but pain got too bad again so I could not work and went on the hydro again but without lyrica)

I also have symptoms of interstitial cystitis on occassion, but that has got better since I use mucilagenous herbs in my diet when I have pain in the bladder.
It is the pelvic pain I suffer with, almost like I cannot keep my body upright and it hurts through my butt cheeks though my thighs and anywhere in between.

Even back on hydros I have alot of pain. Usually it takes a couple days to calm down after a bad pain spell, but it has been 5 days and still hurtin bad, but the medicine takes the edge off so I can work and tend my family.
Been prayin alot and reading the board everyday and I dont plan to stop coming here so that I make friends with people that understand this issue and can help me stay accountable so I dont overdo my pills.
I have had alternative massage therapies done that has helped alot.

Ya know one of the things that is hardest for me is that pain creates a sadness in me...an almost despair in which that is probably why I took more pills this winter. Dark cold intense winter, along with pain, and feeling in despair. I wanted to numb my pain away. HAd someone living with me that got oxy's and methadones alot. I was trying to help them out, so instead of paying me, well I got pills. That person left my house a few weeks ago so that helps

I am only 45. I have 5 grandkids, still raising 3 of my children that are under 18. I dont go to bars, dont date...just work and see friends on occassion (more in summer, we camp and things). I hope to have a long life ahead of me.

I have read that you still have some health things going on. How are you doing? Thank you for your work of service here on the forum and you are so quiet about your own problems....maybe people dont ever consider that you have your own battles and that you are managing without opiates. You are amazing as is your other half

So I guess to answer your question, yes I am treated for fibromyalgia because nobody really knows what the problem is save probably nerve damage.

I have my cancer appt on Wednesday and it will take a week or so to find out the results so I may be an emotional wreck this week, but will keep reading here to manage without taking a bunch of pills. I truly only want to take what I need to keep me working both jobs( 7.5's 4 times per day which has never taken all the pain away, but does totally take the edge off so I feel the pain but not panic or crawl around because I cannot hold myself up)
Thanks for asking about it all. I hope you have a wonderful weekend with Melinda and we have sunshine!! WOO HOO I think this has been the longest winter I remember. It was snowing a couple days ago even (although does not stick on the ground)
Love and Blessings
Kris

Kris ..... It's very common where we find one autoimmune problem we find more as time goes by. It's a problem because there are no cures for autoimmune disorders, like fibro for example, but rather the disorders are treated symptomatically. And it often takes years to get a real diagnosis except for a few autoimmune problems that are detected with simple blood tests. Even those like RA have no cure however. Three of my four problems are worsened by extreme cold temperatures.

Before my wife Melinda and I married we spent some time in Washington state where she is from. I am from Texas and I could barely leave the house in the cold rainy climate there. And the Pacific Northwest is nothing compared to where you live. We relocated back to Texas where I do so much better in the sunshine and heat. Melinda likes Washington better but is trying to make my life more manageable plus she has fibro as well. So this move was not all bad for her disorder as well.

With the fibro I would ask for some specific blood work. I would ask for an ANA, ESR,(sed rate), RF (rheumatoid factor), cbc (complete blood count), the dr will get the drift I am sure. And some of these tests need to be repeated regualrly as the results can change from one test to the next. Again it's another reason it's so hard to get a concrete diagnosis on autoimmune disorders. And a general practioner, although they can read the results, often don't have the background to know how to properly treat the conditions. Rheumatologists are usually the best for autoimmune disorders like I have.

I would be very curious to know how your test results come out. You may need some sort of an anti depressant as well. Cymbalta is used a lot for pain and is also an antidepressant. I'm not trying to prescribe meds, just offering you somethings to consider talking about with the dr. I know for a fact that the fibro will be worsened dramatically in extreme temperatures like Wyoming mountain winters. I come from Chicago and there is no way that I could ever live there again.

Keep me posted on the test results and mention what I've said to your dr. I would be curious to hear what he / she has to say. I pray that you continue to receive good results with the past cancer. Congratulations on being a survivor! That is awesome! Are you seeing an Oncologist this week, a family dr, a rheumatologist, an internist or what? Let me know what they say when you go to the dr. Hope I've been able to help some. God bless.

[cryin out]

Classique Mom, this is definately something I have worked with for years, and ironically once I started getting healthy I was dx with cancer. I was so floored. I have worked with alternative health care for many years and one thing that has come again and again in my eduation is that inflammation tends to be the cause of all dis-ease.

I work with turmeric, mobic(a medication for inflammation) and OTC anti inflammatories as well but it never seems to ease my pain. I recently started trying the raisins soaked in gin remedy. Have you ever heard of that? You soak golden raisins in gin and once the raisins have absorbed the gin, you store in the fridge and eat 10 each day (some people eat 3 times a day) I am starting at the lowest dose.
I will see if that helps my hips at all as well as the tendonitis. Thinking of which, I have not had tendon problems in a couple days...hmmm
Also, omega 3 oils are known to help chronic pain. I take that too.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts sweetie and for your prayers.

HUM HUM-HOW ARE YOU SISTER? Missing you

Robert-thank you my friend for all your suggestions. I agree on all the things you have said and money for me is an issue. I bought a business in october and I have lost hundreds of dollars each month. I am in over my head right now which is part why my doctor does not have me add to my misery because I am sure people see all over my face how concerned I am. In fact I went in for the cancer check on Wednesday. She said everything looks good and now waiting for the test results to return.
She did notice immediately that I do not even look myself and that sadness is all over me and called in a low dose celexa to see if my brightness returns.

I hate taking all these meds and never thought I would ever have to live with pills keeping me going. But here I am, humbled and really praying for some answers and money to take care of my health amongst other things.
My cancer check doc and I did discuss the difficult climate we have here and she agrees that this is something to strongly consider.
Although when I lived in Arkansas a few years ago, the pain began then. So I just keep praying for guidance. I live in an amazing place to raise children, and I have never had so many friends before.
But I also feel alone at times as I do not have other family near, and my friends are all raising families and could not take care of me if things went down so that weighs on my mind.
I also am not sure where I would go...maybe back to Arkansas, I have a house there I gave to my ex. I have some kids there and grandchildren, but I lived there 7 years and just had a hard time making friends for some reason. I was sad alot there I think due to lonliness and boredom...lol

Anyway I am blabbling and I read you and Melinda have some computer issues right now with about 50 people needing sub help, so I dont expect you to rush to my thread...lol but I do thank you for being there.
And I have found that despite me going off meds for 10 days and then needing them again, I know you are not surprised, but I still struggle with my daily dosage.
So many people said I should move to pain management and get a stronger dose of opiate, but I know that my body will get use to it and I will want more, so I pray I will overcome, somehow, someway, with peace and joy. Gosh it sounds so hard to obtain right now.

[CamoToy]

I am actually 5 days out from Opana and today I feel rather good. I hope you all are doing the same. I am going to try to post a link since I see the mentioning of God and Christianity in this post. I have gotten back in touch myself and to me it feels great.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxx-c4dII7c

[cryin out]

Good for you Camo!!! WTG!

Today I got the results from my annual check up and no cancer found. That makes 5 years now. YAY.I hope my joy for life comes back to me. I feel so confused and sad.My business causing so much debt and stress, my battle with pain, and pills.....I hope my joy returns