[trayanne]

I'm a 38 year old female. Donated a kidney to my sister so have only 1 kidney. Medical conditions are: Asthma, Hypothyroidism, Anxiety & Panic Disorder, Acute Sinusitus, current medications I'm taking: Levoxyl, Albuterol Inhaler, Singulair, Xanax 0.5 x 4 per day (for last 3 1/2 yrs). In the past 6-12months I have a racing heartbeat (resting heartbeat is usually 110-115), wake up w/ a racing heartbeat...every time I stand...constant dizziness, headaches, no motivation, agoraphobia along with panic attacks, insomnia and numerous other daily symptoms that have become completely debilitating.
I saw a physchiatrist who wants me on 1500mg of Depakote ER per day and to stop taking the Xanax and take Klonopin .25mg 6 times per day. Is there anyone who is familiar with Klonopin and Depakote ER as I have not taken either yet as I am so afraid to. I am chemically & physically dependant on the Xanax (personal physician gave to me 3 1/2 yrs ago & I didn't know it was addictive) and I'm just so afraid to take more medications but at this point I am not functioning. I have 4 children and a 13 mo old grandaughter and have become bound to my home. Four years ago, I was working & making over 100k a year, travelling, taking care of a home, kids and my sick mother& sister and I can't even walk into Walmart now.

I would deeply appreciate any advise.

Thank you!!

[erinkj]

Originally Posted by trayanne

I'm a 38 year old female. Donated a kidney to my sister so have only 1 kidney. Medical conditions are: Asthma, Hypothyroidism, Anxiety & Panic Disorder, Acute Sinusitus, current medications I'm taking: Levoxyl, Albuterol Inhaler, Singulair, Xanax 0.5 x 4 per day (for last 3 1/2 yrs). In the past 6-12months I have a racing heartbeat (resting heartbeat is usually 110-115), wake up w/ a racing heartbeat...every time I stand...constant dizziness, headaches, no motivation, agoraphobia along with panic attacks, insomnia and numerous other daily symptoms that have become completely debilitating.
I saw a physchiatrist who wants me on 1500mg of Depakote ER per day and to stop taking the Xanax and take Klonopin .25mg 6 times per day. Is there anyone who is familiar with Klonopin and Depakote ER as I have not taken either yet as I am so afraid to. I am chemically & physically dependant on the Xanax (personal physician gave to me 3 1/2 yrs ago & I didn't know it was addictive) and I'm just so afraid to take more medications but at this point I am not functioning. I have 4 children and a 13 mo old grandaughter and have become bound to my home. Four years ago, I was working & making over 100k a year, travelling, taking care of a home, kids and my sick mother& sister and I can't even walk into Walmart now.

I would deeply appreciate any advise.

Thank you!!

I can relate ALL to well! Panic really s*cks, I know! I can answer your questions but, I also have a few questions for you as well. I am in the process of switching over from xanax .5 x's 4 daily (2mg total a day) to klonapin .5 x's 4 daily. So, I can help you on that. Your psych is right to want you off the xanax. Klonapin has anti-seizure properties so, it is an excellent choice for getting off of the xanax. I am not aware of how your dr wants to do your switch but, the best way to do this ( and this is how my psych instructed) is to begin the klonopin by replacing one xanax dose per day with klonopin for a week. Then the next week replace 2 doses and so on, every week until you are off the xanax and only taking the klonopin. It is much less of a shock to your system to switch this way and far more gentle. Klonopin is longer lasting but, it can take a few days to obtain a steady serum level in your body. You really don't feel the klonopin "kick in" not like xanax, it is more of a gradual calming onset. I chose to begin by replacing my bed time xanax dose with the klonopin and by doing that I wake up in the morning feeling calm and not so anxiouse like before because the xanax had worn off. The klonopin will also help you sleep better at night than the xanax because it doesnt have that "let down" of wearing off. Try not to fear switching to klonopin, it will help. As for the Depakote, I am confused as to why you are being put on this. The most logical reason I can think of is that your dr wants to use it to reduce any chance of seizure from comming off of long term xanax use and/or as a mood stabelizer to help with the agoraphobia aspect of your panic! What reason did he give you for adding the depakote? Depakote can be kind of a tricky drug...My husband takes depakote ER 500mg per day, ussually in the evening as it causes drowsiness, it has been very helpful to him but, he doesn't have panic disorder. I have panic disorder but, I was given depakote a few years back to help prevent migraines (had them all my life) personaly, I did not like the Depakote at all. It just made me feel weird. Not panicy or anxious, just kind of weird and BLAH! Upset my stomache some to, so, after a week I quit taking it. Depakote is a sodium based med so, you need to watch for dehydration as a side effect if you don't drink alot of water...You will need to stay well hydrated if you take it. I am sure that you know that the albuteral and singulair can increase anxiety and in fact, induce panic attacks. So, something for you to keep in mind, is that if you have had any recent dosage increases in these med's that may be a cause of the increase in panic. Also, your thyroid med can add to panic, let me explain that: If your T3/T4 levels have gone up or down and your med has stayed the same then, that can contribut because your dose would need to be changed in accord with your levels. Also, if ANY of your medications have been switched from a brand name to a generic recently , that can add to the panic responce. Have you had your thyroid levels checked recently? if not, then you should get that checked possibly before starting the depakote. Also, any changes in your asthma? If it has gotten worse and your albuteral has not been adjusted to compensate then, that can add to breathing difficulties which as we know, will trigger the panic responce. I know that you are only 38 but, you may also be in peri-menopause and your hormones may be freaking out. (rising and falling etc) I am only 35 but, early menopause is hereditary for me and I am in peri-menopause now ...which makes my panic worse...OH JOY! I know that this is all alot to take in but, If it were me, I would have a hormone panel run especially checking cortisol levels..(raised cortisol level causes increase in panic and anxiety) If you get a panel test done, try to have the saliva tests vs. blood test because the saliva method is 10 times more accurate and, less expensive! Have you ever been on Any of the SSRI or any class of anti-deppressant to treat the panic disorder? if so, what have you tried. If not, why? I am NOT a dr and I DO NOT claim to know everything but, I have been re-searching panic/anxiety disorders in depth for 11 years and, if there is one thing in this life that I know ALOT about, it is this. So, maybe I can help. At the very least, I am more than happy to offer you my ear and endless support, as a fellow panic/anxiety sufferer, I understand how you feel and can relate .....Hang in there....Let me know if I can help...Peace...Erin

[erinkj]

I just read back through your past posts. I am so very sorry that you have had to suffer so long. I totally understand! The extended xanax use is absolutely contributing to your panic. As I am sure that you now know, long term xanax use ends up causing the anxiety that you began taking it to treat. Also, some of the anti-deppressants you were given in the past were NOT good choices by your dr. Wellbutrin, zoloft,prozac and some others, while great for deppression are BAD for panic/anxiety because they are stimulating. People with panic are far to sensetive to be on stimulating anti-deppressants.Which is why the above listed med's are primarily for deppression where the stimulation is needed. I have been on all of the above as well but, at the time I was not as well educated on psychiatric medications as I am now or, I would NOT have tried those. I know that you are experiencing some deppression however, (and correct me if I am wrong here please) It appears to me that your primary diagnosis is panic/anxiety disorder (which has progressed to the agoraphobic stage). Comorbid conditions are very common with panic, especially deppression. In most cases it is very common for deppression to follow the panic and while it s*cks, it is an absolutely logical, normal and understandable secondary condition. I meen, who would'nt get deppressed from feeling like absolute dogsh*t due to panic and anxiety? The key to getting through the deppression is to CORRECTLY treat the PRIMARY condition....which in your case is panic (is this right?) I to have run the gamut of anti-deppressants and I TOTALY understand why you don't want to take pills..I am with you on that, in fact I could be considered to be "Pill phobic" (which drives my husband crazy, he is not much help with my issues, I don't think he really understand so, I can relate there also) There are sevral treatment options for you to consider for the panic, if you are interested in learning more, just ask and I will help all that I can. Aside from prescription med's you will also benefit greatly from adding certain vitamins and supplements. Supplements do not cure the problem but, they can and do help...I keep up with ALL the scientific and medical re-search pertaining to panic and other disorders as well as anything to do woth the brain so, I can provide you the links to some studies and re-search should you wish to read it. I know that med's s*ck but, you must weigh the pro's and con's for yourself....Which road s*cks less? I understand all about side effects to....I am 35 and have next to NO sex drive, etc and am going through some screwy med issues myself right now, all of which began 7 months ago when I decided that it was time to get off of SSRI meds, the withdrawal/discontinuation syndrome from SSRI's is no fun but, I have learned that if you want to be off of anti-deppressants succesfully, you need to taper them correctly. Which can be a very slow and long process but, it can be done! The most important thing is that you need to be stable and have all of the panic and anxiety problems treated and under control for at least a few months before making any attempts to get off of the med's....As much as I am sure that you do not want to be on any anti-deppressant, the fact is that you may need to go back on the med's to get control of this growing problem....That is what I have had to do! What it all boils down to in the long run is "QUALITY OF LIFE"....You DO NOT have to feel this miserable. Talk to me, I think I can help .....Peace...Erin

[trayanne]

Originally Posted by erinkj

I can relate ALL to well! Panic really s*cks, I know! I can answer your questions but, I also have a few questions for you as well. I am in the process of switching over from xanax .5 x's 4 daily (2mg total a day) to klonapin .5 x's 4 daily. So, I can help you on that. Your psych is right to want you off the xanax. Klonapin has anti-seizure properties so, it is an excellent choice for getting off of the xanax. I am not aware of how your dr wants to do your switch but, the best way to do this ( and this is how my psych instructed) is to begin the klonopin by replacing one xanax dose per day with klonopin for a week. Then the next week replace 2 doses and so on, every week until you are off the xanax and only taking the klonopin. It is much less of a shock to your system to switch this way and far more gentle. Klonopin is longer lasting but, it can take a few days to obtain a steady serum level in your body. You really don't feel the klonopin "kick in" not like xanax, it is more of a gradual calming onset. I chose to begin by replacing my bed time xanax dose with the klonopin and by doing that I wake up in the morning feeling calm and not so anxiouse like before because the xanax had worn off. The klonopin will also help you sleep better at night than the xanax because it doesnt have that "let down" of wearing off. Try not to fear switching to klonopin, it will help. As for the Depakote, I am confused as to why you are being put on this. The most logical reason I can think of is that your dr wants to use it to reduce any chance of seizure from comming off of long term xanax use and/or as a mood stabelizer to help with the agoraphobia aspect of your panic! What reason did he give you for adding the depakote? Depakote can be kind of a tricky drug...My husband takes depakote ER 500mg per day, ussually in the evening as it causes drowsiness, it has been very helpful to him but, he doesn't have panic disorder. I have panic disorder but, I was given depakote a few years back to help prevent migraines (had them all my life) personaly, I did not like the Depakote at all. It just made me feel weird. Not panicy or anxious, just kind of weird and BLAH! Upset my stomache some to, so, after a week I quit taking it. Depakote is a sodium based med so, you need to watch for dehydration as a side effect if you don't drink alot of water...You will need to stay well hydrated if you take it. I am sure that you know that the albuteral and singulair can increase anxiety and in fact, induce panic attacks. So, something for you to keep in mind, is that if you have had any recent dosage increases in these med's that may be a cause of the increase in panic. Also, your thyroid med can add to panic, let me explain that: If your T3/T4 levels have gone up or down and your med has stayed the same then, that can contribut because your dose would need to be changed in accord with your levels. Also, if ANY of your medications have been switched from a brand name to a generic recently , that can add to the panic responce. Have you had your thyroid levels checked recently? if not, then you should get that checked possibly before starting the depakote. Also, any changes in your asthma? If it has gotten worse and your albuteral has not been adjusted to compensate then, that can add to breathing difficulties which as we know, will trigger the panic responce. I know that you are only 38 but, you may also be in peri-menopause and your hormones may be freaking out. (rising and falling etc) I am only 35 but, early menopause is hereditary for me and I am in peri-menopause now ...which makes my panic worse...OH JOY! I know that this is all alot to take in but, If it were me, I would have a hormone panel run especially checking cortisol levels..(raised cortisol level causes increase in panic and anxiety) If you get a panel test done, try to have the saliva tests vs. blood test because the saliva method is 10 times more accurate and, less expensive! Have you ever been on Any of the SSRI or any class of anti-deppressant to treat the panic disorder? if so, what have you tried. If not, why? I am NOT a dr and I DO NOT claim to know everything but, I have been re-searching panic/anxiety disorders in depth for 11 years and, if there is one thing in this life that I know ALOT about, it is this. So, maybe I can help. At the very least, I am more than happy to offer you my ear and endless support, as a fellow panic/anxiety sufferer, I understand how you feel and can relate .....Hang in there....Let me know if I can help...Peace...Erin

Hi Erin,
Thank you so much for replying. I hope that your switch is going to go smoothly...I will pray that it does. Each day I feel so alone as my husband just says"get over it" and walks right past me as if I don't and the problem doesn't exist. As to your 1st question, she (the pysch) told me to stop taking the Xanax cold turkey today and take the Klonopin. I did not do that. I'm still taking the Xanax because I thought it shpuld be a taper so I think I'll begin tomorrow as you suggested by replacing one dose of Klonopin in replace of the Xanax. When you mention the fear of switching to Klonopin..that says it all to me "I know you know exactly what I'm going through...WOW". Last night I got about 2 hours sleep...heart was racing...took a Xanax @ 12am, 4am and just want it to stop. As for the Depakote ER 500mg, she perscribed that to me 3 weeks ago and said it would calm me down as she said that my mind is just racing. She instructed me to take 1 @ 6pm w/ food & 1 in the am. I never took them. At the appt. with her yesterday I told her that I had nt taken them and she said to take 2 at 6pm with food and 1 in the morning and gave me a perscription for the Klonopin 0.5 mg 3 x per day. She said that it's like taking 6 pills of 0.5mg of Xanax. You are also right on the asthma meds as they do contribute to anxiety and heart rate increase. At the same time, I have evaluated and have deciphered over the last few years what is actually a panic attack and when the current meds magnify or add to it. I just started therapy with a female therapist (avoided going to therapy for way too long) and she suggested a book called the Power of Now which I am trying to learn from. I have a library of manyAnxiety, Panic, Phobia books because I am so deparate for help. This is not me and my kids see me like this every day and I don't just want to Exist in Misery & Fear....I want to live...or feel alive. One of my 16 yr old twin daughters had a root canal today at 1pm and I was scheduled to see the ENT surgeon at 4pm today (she wants to schedule surgery) but I cancelled because I just can't leave today. Yesterday was the 1st time I left my house in 10 days. Erin...I used to travel...shop...couldn't wait to leave..take my kids to Oregon every 3 months and drive 16hrs straight...and I can't even take my daughter to the dentist or go shopping. I'm sending my twin girls into the store for me...this is ridiculous. There are nights when I lay in bed and say to myself..if I am going to wake up and feel this way from the time I wake up until the time I go to sleep...please just let me die. That's another thing...I have a constant fear that I'm going to have a heart attack and die...everyday I feel so doomed. I want to thank you for your time..please let me know how you're doing on your transition and I would love to hear from you and need the help. My e-mail is trayamalone@hotmaildotcom (not sure if you can give out email addresses).
Many blessings!
Tracy

[erinkj]

All of these symptoms and feelings are "classic" even "textbook" panic disorder. The fear of dying and feelings of doom as you know, are also normal for this condition. The problem is that it has all amplified to the point that you cannot leave home and it is working at ruining your life. The therapy is a deffinate step in the right direction, I really truely believe that therapy will help you ALOT! I have been to therapy sessions off and on through the years, ussually when things were bad and, it was money well spent. You can vent it all out to the therapist who is not invovled in your daily life therefore they will be unbiased in their oppinions and advice. Leaving the house when coping with this panic is very, very hard but, you must do your absolute best to make it to therapy. If you have any friends or family members who would be willing to drive you to your apt I think that would be best. I know how difficult it is to consentrate when you are panic ridden which makes driving difficult. Do not listen or take it to heart when someone tells you to "just get over it" that is their fear and ignorance speaking. This is a very REAL condition but, it IS treatable...you can and WILL get through this it is just going to take some time....You WILL get there, I PROMISE! You'r husband likely does not understand panic disorder and is probobly scared and thinks your loosing your grip ...that also is a very common responce from family members....remember, people fear that which they do not know! If you can manage it there is a book that I think you AND your family should read. It is a pretty good book and it is geared toward helping your family understand what you are going through and how they can help you. There is even a section in this book specificly for teenagers. It will help you out ALOT to be open with your children about your problems....If they do not understand what you are dealing with it only makes them scared and confused and then you end up feeling like a bad mom and riddled with guilt. You do not need to feel guilty, you are not letting your family down, you did not ask for this problem and you certainly do not deserve it but, you have panic disorder so, all that you can do is your best. Your best will be different from day to day...some days better than others. I think that as your family begin to learn and understand about panic disorder that you will begin to feel better in some ways. The more they understand, the less guilt and worry that you will have about them...The book is called: Talking to Anxiety, simple ways to support someone in your life who suffers from anxiety. BY: Claudia J. Strauss....This book is really helpfull....My husband was such a pain in the *ss about my panic that I bought this book and threatend divorce if he did not read it....He still had some questions and even now gets confused about some of it but, it opened the door to his understanding me and my problems better. Scince then, he has read and learned more. (of course, he now has some anxiety issues himself, and he has had ADHD his entire life so, he is a SPAZ) regardless, you need the support of your loved ones now more than ever and, until they begin to understand they won't be able to give that support! I CANNOT believe that your psychiatrist wants you to cold turkey off of xanax OMG that would be a BIG mistake...you may want to find a new psychiatrist...Honestly, if your psych is unaware of how difficult and potentially dangerouse cold turkeying xanax can be then, you should at the very least, get a second oppinion!!!! Google search "the Ashton method" this is the most commonly used formula for getting off of benzo's and gives detailed taper scheduales for xanax and how to switch to the klonapin (same as I told you before) Dr. Ashton is a renowned leader in the research and treatment of benzo addictions...I think the site benzo.org has an entire book written by her that you can download free. Also, think back on what, if any anti-deppressant medications that you have taken in the past that worked for you or at least any that helped to keep your panic under control as you may need to go back on one of those meds. I KNOW that you don't want to take med's...none of us do....but, you do not want to continue as you are...so, if there was a med you took before that helped you should tell your dr about it...At least if it is a med that you have taken before then you already know how you react to it and what to expect, that should help to ease some of the anxiety you have about taking a med! I am NOT trying to push med's on you but, I also recognise the severity of your panic and it only seem's to be getting worse. So, at least consider the option o.k. My e:mail is perkinse@wmpenn.edu if you would rather write to me directly....I ussually check that mail daily...Keep your chin up Tracy, there really is hope...Peace and hug's to you...Erin

[trayanne]

Hi Erin,
You have given me some hope as I have never known or spoke to anyone personally who knows what I'm feeling and going through. I am not happy with this physc dr. she seems to not listen & jump to write a scrip. I was shocked when she said to just switch..even my Pulmo dr. said no matter what don't just ever stop even if being switched to another benzo. I am going to try the Klonopin tonight before I go to bed. How is your switch working? Are you able to work and at the worst time of your Panic Disorder how were you functioning? Also, in regards to my racing heartbeat, in monitoring my sypmtoms, feelings & side effects I truly believe that I'm withdrawling once the Xanax leaves my system and that may also cause an increase in my heart rate which probably explains why I can even wake up with my hr at 130-140 beats. I will definitely get the book that you suggested because especially with my twin daughters...them knowing what I did 3 years ago until now makes them very sad. One of the girls checks on me through the night and is constantly asking "are you ok" and it is so unfair and like you said I do feel so guilty and as if I've lost so much time and those special events where I just couldn't bring myself to go or would go but only to sit in the car...shaking, throwing-up, heart racing. So I'm sure that the book would be very beneficial to my kids. I know that you mentioned the anti-depressants that were too stimulating (which isn't good when you have panic & anxiety attacks). Do you know which anti-depressants do not cause stimulating effects that will increase anxiety? Thank you for all of your insight, advise and most of all your time in listening and wilingness to help.
XOXO
Tracy

[erinkj]

I think that you are right on about your recent increase in heart rate being due to xanax withdrawal. As you well know, the longer you take xanax, the more tollerence you build and then need to take more....ERGH! I am with you. Fortunately for me I have only been taking the xanax daily for 7 months. I have had xanax for 11 years but, it was only on an "as needed" and not a daily basis. Until 7 months ago, I only ever used my xanax when I needed to for the short term, like when I was switching ssri med's or during my menstrual cycle. (I get very jittery and sometimes have panic attacks during my monthly) for many years I took .25 mgs xanax and 60 pills would last me for months. I have even had my prescriptions expire before I would need to fill them...But, 7 months ago I decided that I wanted to get off of the ssri med's once and for all..(lost my sex drive, energy,etc) so, I quit the last med I was on which was lexapro (Lexapro gave me acid reflux so bad....every time I have tried lexapro I have had to take nexium) after going off of the SSRI's The panic hit me like a ton of bricks....I was knocked on my a*s with it...so, I started taking the xanax every day, the psych dr that I USED to see...(I have managed to find a very smart psych recently) had me take .5 mgs xanax 4 times a day for the past 7 months and, of course I became dependant. I realised that the xanax was a problem, I had never needed to take it every day before, then I started to get the withdrawals between doses which really, really felt creepy! So, several months ago, I went back on an ssri hoping to stabelize so that I could wean off of xanax and get the panic under control once again. (The worst for me was 11 years ago when it all started and before I was on med's) So, now I am working on trying to get the right dose of my ssri and I may be switching to something else soon....I REFUSE to live my life in a constent state of panic, If this meens that I have to take med's then, so be it. I have learned enough about getting off of ssri med's now to know that I can stop taking them in the future and that I can be FINE without them in the long term however, when I stopped taking them I had listened to my previous psychiatrist and tapered off of the med way to quickly. I have scince learned soo much about how to stop the med's safely and correctly. I WILL taper off of an antideppressant in the future however, I also know that I must have the panic under control and be well and truely stable on a medication for a few months (at least) before I can begin to slowly, patiently taper off. The key to getting off of the med's is to have patience and take it SLOW! I HATE being on SSRI's or any other anti-deppressant but, I know that I MUST function and when I was off of my med I was lucky if I could dress myself let alone leave the house! I am still not feeling as well as I did prior to quiting my ssri 7 months ago but, I am feeling better than I did while I was off of the med's. I am afraid to try new med's to...actually I would go as far as to say that I am terrified but, If that is what it will take then so be it because, I WANT MY LIFE BACK! I am functional now and am not having any problems with agorophobia.
The only time lately that I am not up to leaving the house and struggle is when my xanax begins to wear off and
I get that choking sensation like my throat is closing up and I feel like I cannot swallow...My heart rate has been pretty good for awhile now although I am still having occassional bouts of rapid heart rate and the ever joyfull hyperventilation symptoms like I can't breath...again, these episodes are primarily when the xanax wears off so, I like you feel that the xanax has made it worse. Tonight is my 3rd night of substituting a xanax dose for a klonopin so, I am just at the beggining of my switch...in week 1 but, so far so good...I sleep better taking the klonopin before bed and wake up feeling more calm....My fingers are crossed but, I think it will go well, I will keep you posted on this. Paxil is the ssri that I started with and honestly it worked the best for me of any of the med's I have ever taken...I gained some weight while I was getting used to it mostly because it made me tired for the first couple of months so, I slept more and was not as active. Once I got used to it and got passed the sleepy side effect everything else was great...I stopped taking paxil because a generic version became available and the insurance I had at the time required me to take generics when they were available, the generic did not work for me, it actually made me worse (looking back I am sure it was a withdrawal from the brand name) as Paxil cost over $100.00 a month out of pocket I had to switch. I tried Paxil CR and it wasn't very effective for me....I have heard from others that did well on Paxil that did not have good results with Paxil CR. I was on Paxil brand for 6 years and I did not have the sexual side effects with it, at least if it affected my sex drive at all it was not enough for me to take notice. Again, we are all different and react differently to meds. You have taken Paxil before correct? If so, how did you do on that one? Paxil is one of the better SSRI's for panic and anxiety but not as good for deppression. I had sexual side effects and constant fatigue on lexapro and on celexa. (am back on celexa now because Lexapro destroys my stomache...UGH) Prozac and zoloft both made my panic worse (I tried them in the hope that either would work for the panic but lessen the fatigue and sexual sides....BIG mistake, they made me jump out of my skin, to stimulating) I was on Effexer for awhile to and it was O.K I guess but, I just felt very BLAH on it and it did not completely control the panic but, it did not make worse either. After Paxil I had to try several SSRI's before landing on one that worked....Now I may end up trying yet another...It can be VERY frustrating but,I know that I MUST get it under control. Remeron was reccomended by my psych but, I am giving the celexa awhile longer at a different dose to see if that works before I try anything else. And, I am going to be off the xanax completely before attempting a different med if I need one. I have talked to a few people who take remeron for panic and they have told me it works well for them, the only common side effects are that at lower doses (which is where you would start it) that it can be sedating in that it makes you tired, it also stimulates your appetite making you more hungry than ussual so, some people will overeat and then oversleep so that they end up gaining weight...I have also been told that remeron at higher doses is not as sedating but, I have not tried it. Also, remeron is NOT an SSRI so, it works differntly and I am told that the sexual side effects are not as much of a problem as with SSRI med's...It is an option at least...There are others of course. What have you taken that has helped? Anything? I can share my panic story with you if you want to read it, All about when it began and became chronic and I HAD to take meds but, I warn you it is not a pretty story but rather an ugly one! I am going out of town for the next day or 2, I have to take some things to my husbands job site so, I will be gone overnight. If I do not reply to any posts or e:mail from you for another day or two it is only because I am away....Peace and hug's to you tracy...Goodnight...Erin

[trayanne]

Hello Erin,

I hope that you are doing well with your transition.
As for me..I'm struggling. On Wednesday night, I took my first dose of Klonopin at about 9:00pm and it seemed to have given me a headache, a bit of nausea (could be because I was nervous about taking it) and an overall uneasy feeling. I woke up at 3:00 am and took a Xanax and continued my Xanax throughout Thursday. I saw my personal physician yesterday & he also said to stop the Xanax abruptly and switch to the Klonopin. This morning at 8:00am I took the Klonopin and have a headache, have vomited several times, have like a metal taste in my mouth...it is now 12:17pm and am crying and don't like the way I'm feeling. If I'm to take 3 Klonopin oer day that's 1 at 8am, 2pm & 8pm. I feel as though I need to take a Xanax. I have been on these stupid Xanax for nearly 4 yrs and I don't know if it's just going to take time for the Klonopin to kick in or what. I just know it's not a smooth transition and I keep thinking I'm going to go into seizures or something. I just don't know what to do. I just called the physch dr and she said don't take the Xanax..I don't think she knows what she's talking about....What do you think..I wish I could just go to sleep & this would all be over. I've never been a weak person but feel as if this is the end of the road.
XOXO
Tracy

[erinkj]

Originally Posted by trayanne

Hello Erin,

I hope that you are doing well with your transition.
As for me..I'm struggling. On Wednesday night, I took my first dose of Klonopin at about 9:00pm and it seemed to have given me a headache, a bit of nausea (could be because I was nervous about taking it) and an overall uneasy feeling. I woke up at 3:00 am and took a Xanax and continued my Xanax throughout Thursday. I saw my personal physician yesterday & he also said to stop the Xanax abruptly and switch to the Klonopin. This morning at 8:00am I took the Klonopin and have a headache, have vomited several times, have like a metal taste in my mouth...it is now 12:17pm and am crying and don't like the way I'm feeling. If I'm to take 3 Klonopin oer day that's 1 at 8am, 2pm & 8pm. I feel as though I need to take a Xanax. I have been on these stupid Xanax for nearly 4 yrs and I don't know if it's just going to take time for the Klonopin to kick in or what. I just know it's not a smooth transition and I keep thinking I'm going to go into seizures or something. I just don't know what to do. I just called the physch dr and she said don't take the Xanax..I don't think she knows what she's talking about....What do you think..I wish I could just go to sleep & this would all be over. I've never been a weak person but feel as if this is the end of the road.
XOXO
Tracy

Take a deep breath dearest, it will be ok, I promise! I can relate. I to have wished many times that I could just go to sleep and wake up when all this panic stuff is over . You absolutely need to see a NEW DOCTOR! I know that I am NOT a doctor but, I do know that your doctors are WRONG! I have only been on the xanax every day for 7 months and my psych and my family dr have both told me NOT to stop my xanax. I will post the exact instructions that my psych gave me for switching over. You have taken the klonopin 2 times now? Is your klonopin 0.5 mgs? I was given klonopin (clonazepam the generic) 0.5 mgs as an equivilant to my xanax 0.5 mgs. I was taking 4 xanax a day at 0.5 mgs. I was instructed to take my 0.5 mg xanax 3 times per day and to take one of the 0.5 mg klonopin a day for the first week. I was told that I could choose which of my daily doses to substitute but, that I would need to substitute for that same dose EVERY DAY for a week. (I chose my bedtime dose) Week 2: I am supposed to sustitute the same dose that I did for week one but, also to substitute another dose. Substituting 2 doses for another full week. Then 3 substitutions for a 3rd week and finally all 4 doses the fourth week then, I would be OFF the xanax. You MUST remember to sub the same dose/doses every day, otherwise it is harder to adjust to. I was also told to keep the 2 med's at least 4 hours apart. If I take a xanax then, I need to wait at least 4 hours befor taking a klonopin and vice versa. As for the nausea, that and headache can be a side effect of the klonopin and it can also be a xanax withdrawal symptom. So,my advice; if you can try taking one dose of klonopin a day for another day or two and see how you feel (unless you are having any allergic type reactions) If the nausea persists or if it makes you vomit again then, stop taking it; revert back to taking only xanax and then call your doctor and tell him/her that you have an adverse reaction to klonopin....They should then give you vallium. If klonopin doesn't work for you then, vallium should. ALL of us are different, I know some people who cannot take klonopin and some who cannot take vallium but, in each of these cases (that I know of) if someone cannot take klonopin then, the vallium has always worked well and vice versa. They may try to switch you to Ativan even though it is not as long lasting, but, it is a decent benzo and not as addictive etc as xanax. I have been given ativan (lorazepam is the generic) while in the hospital before and I reacted well to it. My husband cannot take Ativan because for him, it does the opposite, it makes him VERY anxiouse. So, you see, we all react differently but, there is a benzo that will work for you in place of xanax, I PROMISE! If your dr or psych dr give you ANY trouble more trouble over this or won't try a different med if you cannot tollerate the klonopin then, you will have no choice but to find a new dr!!!I would start looking NOW! It sounds to me like they are brushing you off and are not knowledgable about treating benzo addictions or even the panic for that matter .....Did you take the depakote ER? If so, how do you feel on that? If you tell me what city you live in or are close to I can make some reccomendations for a new psych in your area that can treat the benzo addiction and the panic....If you don't treat the panic then, you are less likely to have success getting off of the benzos. Are you taking anything for that? There are a few other VERY SMART people who I talk to on these forums who have also been addicted/dependant on xanax who will all tell you NOT to COLD TURKEY xanax even while switching to another benzo! If you would like to hear their oppinions as well, I will direct them to your post. When the panic is bad do your absolute best to TRY and focus on anything other than how you are feeling, find ANYTHING to distract your mind.....I think you had mentioned that you write in a journal, if so, keep it up; if not, then start one...write about how you feel or anything you wish to write about....Keep talking to me, I will give you all the support and encouragement that I can.....Anytime, I WILL LISTEN! Keep your chin up dear there really is hope and you WILL get through this....Peace and hug's...ERin

[trayanne]

I have been in bed for most of the day only getting up to use the restroom or to check my bp which is running about 90/50. I have been crocheting a blanket (in 110 degree temp), reading, E-bay & just trying to stay positive and pray that this is right. Overall, the day has been miserable…still have the achy headache and my eyes are extremely sensitive to light. I’m having several heart palpitations per hr and it’s about 7:00pm and have only had 2 Klonopin & no Xanax. I will take another Klonopin at 8:00pm & that’s it for the night I guess. I really think that I should have never listened to either of these dr’s. Yes, the Klonopin is 0.5mg. and I have not taken the Depakote ER and don’t plan on taking it at all. I’m letting her know next week to give me an anti-depressant (non-stimulating as you recommended). I have been seeing my dr. for 13yrs & can’t believe that he would say not to taper either. He disagreed with the physh on the Depakote ER as she wanted me on it 3x per day 1500mgs. He said absolutely not to start out with 500mgs for 2 weeks then increase to another 500mgs and so on…but I’m not trusting that either. I live in Cabazon,CA which is near Palm Springs & to the West is Redlands. It’s now 7:22 and I had to take a Xanax….it’s horrible..I’m just going to follow your taper because I just feel awfu;. I almost made it until 8:00 for the next Klonopin but I am not about to flip out for the remainder of the night which can be until 2-3am. Thank you Erin for listening and for helping me. Many hugs to you….I’m going to walk outside to sit in a chair for a few minutes a take some deep breaths.

[erinkj]

You are most welcome. I wish that I could make it all better for you. I think you tried to switch over to the klonopin to quick which has ALOT to do with how you feel today. Good job hanging in there and trying it the way your psych said to. When you talk to or see your psych dr you may want to print info on how to switch from xanax over to another med. Print off info on the Ashton method to give her and then just tell her flat out, that you WILL NOT cold turkey switch your xanax and that she can either instruct and oversee your gradual switch (Ashton method is how I was instructed) or, you are going to find a new doctor who will. Remember that as a patient you have every right to disagree with a doctor and to refuse anything that you do not agree with. YOUR care is your CHOICE! Take her the litterature that you print off of the net, if she will not read it and will not agree with how you wish to switch then FIRE her....you are paying her wages after all! Tomorro I will check with one of my friends for reccomendations on a few good psychiatrists in your area...(she is a psychiatric nurse practitioner and can check refferences for me) I think you should stick to your xanax for tonight....I am NOT a doctor though so, this is just my oppinion. Take it easy, don't be to hard on yourself....Your BP is borderline low though so, do keep an eye on that...I hope that you can sleep tonight...I will check with you tommorro....Hang in there Tracy...Peace and BIG hug's...Erin

[trayanne]

Good Morning Erin,
Wow...it was a rough night. I had some chest pains that made feel as though "this is it..I'm going to have a heart attack tonight". Heart rate stayed in the upper 120's through the night. I finaly fell asleep at 2:30am. I took a Xanax at 8:00am and am going to replace with 1 dose of Klonopin today. I am going to print out the information for her, bring it to her & tell her I DON"T agree with her treatment plan on this at all. How are you feelng? Is your switch to Klonopin going ok? I found that I get no drowsiness at all..just the headache and some dizziness. I am just going to take it easy today. Thanks for the encouragement. I probably would have tried to stick it out CT last night if I hadn't read your last reply..and it was going through my mind the entire day...I shouldn't do it this way...so I'm glad as I was writing you back I took the dose...I may have not ben writing you today...who knows?? I do know that as you said I'm going to take control of my treatment. I do believe that next week will be my last visit with her. My general dr. said he was going to start the paperwork for SSI because and he was going to get some back-up from her but I've only seen her for a month so I'm not sure if that will affect the outcome of SSI. I hope you have a beautiful day!
XOXO
Tracy

[erinkj]

I am very glad that you are feeling better today. I am glad that you are going to stand up to your psych. Sometimes they get to arrogant and try to push us around. ...My switch is going O.K. Not great but, not bad either....I don't realy feel much of the calming effect that klonopin is supposed to give but, I know that it takes a few days to a week for it to reach a steady serum level in your body....So, I guess it kind of has to build up awhile. I am going to keep working on the switch as my psych instructed at least for another few weeks. If I don't feel like the klonopin works very well for me or, if I start getting more attacks then, my psych said she would have me do a trial of vallium to see if that works better for me. Medications can be so tricky, you never realy know what will work for you until you try it. I will keep you posted on how it goes! Do you know what brought on this latest bought of panic? did you quit taking any medication recently/prior to this period of panic increase? You said that you have been on the xanax for 3 1/2 yrs but, were you on anything else for panic during that time? Just curious....I jope you continue to do well, I will keep checking in with you...Big hug's...Erin

[trayanne]

Hi...
Hope you're doing ok. I've never been on anything else but the Xanax for for the panic. There were a few periods of time over the last 3 1/2 - 4 yrs where they actually added Valium or Ativan to take at night only. A BIG NO NO-2 benzos is a bad thing. I stopped that very fast once I began to do some research. When I think back around the time my dr. put me on Xanax was when I stopped taking my anti-depressant..I just was soo tired of taking anti-depressants for over 13-14 yrs. I almost believe that I was probably withdrawing from the anti-depressant because I stopped abruptly (had no education on them really...just took what the dr. gave me) and maybe by what feelings I was describing to my dr. he said it was anxiety and panic. During that time I did have some pretty devastating & difficult things going on but was always very functional and held an Executive level position and did all things then..that I don't do now. I id take 3 doses of Xanax today and will try 1 dose of Klonopin tonight..I really dread it after yesterday. I feel a little drained and the Klonopin makes me very restless...not calming to me at all but I will try again tonight. As for what brought on the latest bought of Panic...to be honest I have been in this state if panic,anxiety,fear, depression & agoraphopia for 2 yrs. I honestly believe that the Xanax has caused all of this, magnified it and has taken over completely. If this taper doesn't work for me..I'mnot trying to be negative but my I may just go into a detox. I was scheduled to go in last October 6th, got pneumonia, then found out my lungs had lost 20-30% function, have beginning stages of COPD along with asthma isn't a good combo and when they told me I couldn't keep my inhaler or have hair spray, shampoo etc.,.I freaked out a little because I just imagine the worse that I would die in thre and not see my twin girls grqduate high school or be able to spend each day with my grandaughter (my 20 yr old son has custody of her since birth & they live us). If that is what it takes, if I can't find the right help from a dr who specializes or is familiar with benzo addiction & tapering then I will resort to that. I just don't only want the old me back...I want a better me now. I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend. Please let me know how you are doing.
Many hugs & blessings!
Tracy

[erinkj]

Originally Posted by trayanne

Hi...
Hope you're doing ok. I've never been on anything else but the Xanax for for the panic. There were a few periods of time over the last 3 1/2 - 4 yrs where they actually added Valium or Ativan to take at night only. A BIG NO NO-2 benzos is a bad thing. I stopped that very fast once I began to do some research. When I think back around the time my dr. put me on Xanax was when I stopped taking my anti-depressant..I just was soo tired of taking anti-depressants for over 13-14 yrs. I almost believe that I was probably withdrawing from the anti-depressant because I stopped abruptly (had no education on them really...just took what the dr. gave me) and maybe by what feelings I was describing to my dr. he said it was anxiety and panic. During that time I did have some pretty devastating & difficult things going on but was always very functional and held an Executive level position and did all things then..that I don't do now. I id take 3 doses of Xanax today and will try 1 dose of Klonopin tonight..I really dread it after yesterday. I feel a little drained and the Klonopin makes me very restless...not calming to me at all but I will try again tonight. As for what brought on the latest bought of Panic...to be honest I have been in this state if panic,anxiety,fear, depression & agoraphopia for 2 yrs. I honestly believe that the Xanax has caused all of this, magnified it and has taken over completely. If this taper doesn't work for me..I'mnot trying to be negative but my I may just go into a detox. I was scheduled to go in last October 6th, got pneumonia, then found out my lungs had lost 20-30% function, have beginning stages of COPD along with asthma isn't a good combo and when they told me I couldn't keep my inhaler or have hair spray, shampoo etc.,.I freaked out a little because I just imagine the worse that I would die in thre and not see my twin girls grqduate high school or be able to spend each day with my grandaughter (my 20 yr old son has custody of her since birth & they live us). If that is what it takes, if I can't find the right help from a dr who specializes or is familiar with benzo addiction & tapering then I will resort to that. I just don't only want the old me back...I want a better me now. I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend. Please let me know how you are doing.
Many hugs & blessings!
Tracy

From what you said my "Educated" guess ( I am a walking anti-deppressant encyclopedia ) I think that when you quit your anti-deppressant that you did not taper off of it. Of course, even now many doctors try to say that there is no such thing as SSRI withdrawals (or discontinuation syndrome as some say) but, you can, do and will have withdrawal symptoms from quiting an ant-deppresssant if not done correctly! Those withdrawals will mimic many of the symptoms for which you were put on the drug to treat only worse in many cases...Over the years the xanax has likely made it worse but, the xanax acts like a bandaid in a way as it only masks and helps relieve the symptoms but does not treat the actual problem....I am sick of anti-depressants to but some of us just need one. It s*cks, I know. If you have tried vallium before then, how did that work for you? if it helped any then, you can always switch from xanax to vallium instead of klonopin. You may want to try that if you feel that the klonopin is making you restless, etc. Doctors who treat benzo addictions especially with xanax do commonly use either vallium or klonopin to wean patients off of xanax so, keep that in mind. At ALL times always remember that you DO have options for your treatment, several in fact. If you did go through a detox I would reccomend that you first get stable on an anti-deppressant ....Once you get back on an anti-deppressant or find one that works for you then, you may not even need to think about a detox...Once the panic is being treated with med's you should have less difficulty getting off of the xanax...Also, there are more than just one type of benzo detox program out there. Not all centers would forbid you from taking your other med's during your treatment....They are prescribed to you for very real health problems. You would need to detox through a medical center not a "drug rehab" there is a big difference between the two. Do you smoke? or did you? I do ..I know, it can make the panic worse but, one thing at a time...My mom has COPD with Emphysema so, I understand about needing your inhalers. My husband sais that I am kicking and twitching alot in my sleep and I think it is from the klonopin. The only difference that I notice at all with the klonopin is that when I take it before bed, I don't feel as anxous or jittery when I wake up in the morning and I don't need to take my xanax until after I have been up for an hour or two. Other than that...NOTHING. If you did take vallium before, could you tell me how that was for you? My husband was on it for a short time over a year ago and he said it did nothing for him but, klonopin works great for him.....He was up to 12 mgs of xanax a day at one point......Psych got him down to 6 mgs a day and then started to switch him over to klonopin (she put him on depakote for a while to prevent possible seizures from the high xanax dose) He has been switched over to klonopin and completely off xanax for about 6 months now. He takes 5 mgs klonopin a day (down from 6 mgs a month ago) He is now tapering his klonopin by 1 mg a month and doing realy well with the tapers. We could be ALOT worse off with our xanax usage, which is encouraging to me. If my insurance would cover a detox I would gladly go...It would be like a mini vacation for me...no phones, kids or responsabilities....It would give me a chance to focus on getting mysel better...Anyway, I am feeling kind of BLAH today/night so, I am going to bed early....Hope the klonopin helps tonight, talk to you later....Hug's and Peace...ERin

[erinkj]

Tracy, How are you doing?

[trayanne]

Hi Erin,
How are you doing? I hope that you are doing well with the switch. Does it seem to be helping you at all? I feel as if it makes me a little anxious still. I am still feeling as if it's such a struggle..but trying to hang in there. I had to take my daughter to the dentist yesterday...I was there 3 hours and by the time I got home my blood pressure was 160/100 and my hr was at 165...shaking terrible. Yesterday, I took a Xanax @ 8:30am, another @11:30am, a 1/2 of 0.5 @ 1:00pm, a Klonopin @ 5:00pm and a Xanax @ 9pm...so that was my regimen..I didn't sleep much and feel pretty sluggish today. I'm really trying to stick it out a week. I go back to the physch next Tuesday. Yes Erin, I used to smoke for 15 yrs...with asthma which is completely stupid. My mom has COPD & Emphysema i& is on oxygen 24/7 & can't walk 8 steps without tiring out & she is only 58 yrs old. You would have thougt that I would have known better...but I did quit 9 months ago...a little late as I do have beginning stages of COPD. When I took the Valium it was only at bedtime...he said to take for sleep..I don't really think it did much other than make me a little groggy in the morning. I have also thought about if I were to go into detox it would probably be my only vacation. Do you have kids? Also, are you able to work? The center that my insurance would pay for is Loma Linda Behavioral Medical Center. They said I could take my meds to the center but they would in turn get the perscriptions for them and give to me as perscribed...but I could not keep my inhaler with me. I practically sleep with it in my hand at night so I guess that freaked me out a little. If it is necessary for me to go after a couple months of trying to taper without success I will definitely re-consider going in. I just want to feel alive again. Please let me know how you are doing ok. I'm trying to feel good enough to go to the Post office & check my mail today....and if everybody's lucky I'll have the energy to cook dinner for them tonight.
Many hugs & blessings to you!
Tracy

[skbeany]

we found out that my cousin is bipolar a few years ago and her dr. gave her depakote it works wonderfully for her when she takes it but i thought it was for bipolar and not anxiety. but im not a dr. so i dont know. best of luck to you.

[trayanne]

The perscribing dr. told me that it's a mood stabilizer and that it can be used for Bi-polar at 4,000-6,000mgs a day. She wants me on 1500mgs per day and said that it should "slow my mind" and help the anxiety. At this point I haven't taken it. Can you tell me any of the side effects that she experienced.
Thanks so much.
Tracy

[trayanne]

At my last appt. with the phsych she said I should speak to my general physician about applying for SSI or SSDI benefits (can't remember which or what the difference is). She said because she has only been treating me for a little over a month she would not be able to do any of the paperwork according to the law & my last physch I saw for 2 mos and she left California for a job in New York & she wouldn't be able to assist me in it either. I have not worked in nearly 4-5 years. Prior to that I held an Executive level position, was successfully meeting & exceeding the requirements of my job making over 6 figures. The reason I have not worked in the last 3 years is due to my anxiety & panic attacks, PTS & depression and now the addiction to Xanax. I have never looked into it SSDI and am not familiar with the process. I had an appt. with my general MD who has been treating me for over 13 yrs & he said he would have the nurse begin the paperwork but only use the major depression on the "Paperwork". Today, the nurse called my oldest son (she has a crush on him) & during the conversation he asked if she had begun the paperwork and she said she knew nothing about it but told him I would need to go on-line and begin the process and it would then go to the dr. for the back-up & medical information & treatment plan etc.,. I would like to know if anyone is familiar with the process. If I am entitled to any benefits for my condition during this time I would like to follow the necessary steps. I've never received any type of assistance but even if I were entitled to some temporary help while trying to get the proper treatment, care and assistance I am in desparate need of it. At this point, I am selling small items on Ebay to cover my $20 office visit co-pays therapist, phsych, pulmonary, ENT & personal MD & some perscriptions but I'm running out of options & things to sell on Ebay.
Thanks so much.
Tracy

[erinkj]

Hello Tracy, Happy Independence day! ...Sorry that I have not responded to you sooner, been real busy around here. I don't actually work a normal job anymore. Not because of panic issues but, because I worked part time at a grocery store meat dept and quit a little over a year ago as I was not getting enough hours. I am going to school FULL time, I am in my senior year of college. (better late than never) I went back at 31 and I am 35 now...One year left to go. I am an Artist and I will also be pursueng my masters degree as I want to teach the art's at the college level which requires a masters. The good news is that I may have a job lined up already which will allow me to begin teacheing (at my alma matter) while I work on my masters....Am keeping my fingers crossed. My husband has his own bussiness, he is a deisel mechanic but, he is mobile and travels a 5 state area so, I go to work with him some times and other times I bring him parts etc. So, I stay realy busy which helps ALOT! I will start taking 2 klonopin a day beggining on Monday. So far, substituting one xanax dose daily for a klonopin has not been to bad...It took awhile to adjust but, now it is going well which is why I feel ready to sub a second dose. I don't know about SSI in your state but, here in Iowa you have to apply for it at the social security office and then they send the physicians paper work to them and th