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Advice for Methadone Taper Plan
Been following your thread, you still doing ok?
I was also using methadone through pain mngmt dr and slowly lowered my dose to 30mg daily. I also didn't really feel it much until I got under 30mg. Which I never really successfully did. So I went CT off at 30mg, with my Drs help. Clonidine and Xanax. My last methadone was June 15, so I'm almost at a month. Most of my acute symptoms have passed, although I'm still quit unmotivated/depressed, anxious, have insomnia, and digestive issues. I really wanted to recommend probiotics, starting them as soon as possible, for digestive health while going through withdrawals. I know you said you had some bowl issues and Chrones. I'm not a dr. And u might check with your dr., but I know for me the probiotics have really helped with digestion during withdrawal. I wish I had started taking them back in June.
Anyways, would love to hear how you are doing?
Thanks for sharing your story. You should be very proud..what a wonderful achievement. Glad you found things to help with some of the wd issues but those are a BIG no no for me. Tried them w/out dr consent or discussion before and I ended up on a month long steriod treatment to get things back under control. However some Crohn's patients are able to use them successfully, it just depends on what area is most effected by their disease.
Its due to the Crohn's that I will not do ct and if this taper becomes too difficult then I will try subs to continue the process, but one way or the other I WILL get there. I feel fine now on day 3 of 35mg but will not be going any lower for a few more days, if I have to reduce by only 1/2mg at a time I will get through this, but I plan to reduce to 30mg, see how I feel, stay till ready to reduce again and only reduce 10% if I've had any issues, if not I will go to 25mg.
I think I will likely run into issues somewhere around the 20-25mg point, but the dr I saw this week said if I can get to that 20mg point then they can switch my meds over if I wish to finish up my taper. He said they switch you to a dose slightly higher than equal to the methadone dose and have you stay at it for 3wks, then you can taper a little better from that medication, this is not subs by the way. I spoke with two of the patients who went this route and found it helpful, and it seemed to have helped them avoid a lot of the acute symptoms and shortened the length of the wd process in comparison to the methadone wds.
We'll have to see how it goes, but I'm glad to have options, have had a pretty smooth taper so far, and a lot of great support and inspiration from this site. Thanks again for sharing your story..its great to hear it from someone who has/is experiencing it first hand. Kat
Hello 2befree (Kat)...
Like whats, I also don't have any experience with methadone, bu tI read your thread and just wanted to jump in and lend my support. I can only imagine how tough this must be, and am really impressed that you are doing so well! I am on a taper plan myself right now ( with subs though) and had the GREAT fortune to have lots of super experienced folks walk me through it. Seems like you are in less familiar territory with methadone tapering, though I see you did get some really great advice here... So just wanted to mention that I am really impressed with how well you are doing, and that you seem to have a really positive outlook...
I can't really advise on the specifics of how to handle your taper, but I can say that you are doing the right thing by coming here and posting- that much I am sure of. So hang in there! Keep posting so we can see how you are doing!
I'm so happy to see others posting here!!! I told you your story read an inspiration!!!!! You are doing so amazing!!!!! Im so proud of you!!! I agree to take it nice and slow at this point. No sense rushing it. You ate making such amazing progress. You should be so Proud too!!!!!
whats and lisainnyc
Thanks for the feedback and support, its always great to see your post.
Just have a minute and wanted to post since today will be my first day at 30mg. I still can't believe how far I've come in the past 6wks and with very little negative side effects. My next taper I hope will be to 25mg and then I plan to only taper by 10% from that point, it may take a little longer, but I want to do this right.
I was a little disappointed to find the drug in subs is bupe. In 2001, while in the hospital, they gave me this in a shot form to help with pain, I was already on a pain pump (iv morphine)and the weekend dr covering for my dr thought it would help to use it in rotation. Within 2min of the nurse putting it through the iv route I was having a terrible allergic reaction. It took a lot of other meds to get me back to feeling better and it was a nightmare. I've had several allergic reactions before but this one was one of the worst..so subs are not an option. But I refuse to let this interfere with my long term goal of getting off methadone.
So I either taper my way off with methadone or go the route my dr suggested with using other short acting meds if I get the methadone mg low enough to switch but I WILL do this one way or the other. Right now I am sticking with what is working...taper...taper..taper...if I have to taper to 1/2mg to be successful I will do this..failure is not an option.
After reading so many of the post I realized I'm more blessed than I even thought, I have a very supportive family and a dr. willing to help with the process and then all the incredible folks on this site. My heart breaks for those trying to do this without support other than this site, especially the mothers trying to do this with small kids at home with no assistance. I have one daughter who is 13 and she is home schooled but I have my husband to step in and help with whatever I need and he does it out of love and compassion, never making me feel guilty for needing to take care of me. Its me I have to remind at times to take care of me so I can be better for them in the long run. I cried reading a post where a wife said her husband didn't want her posting on this site, and others where their spouse puts them down or still offers pills knowing their weak at the moment. But I equally cheer all those who rose above so many obstacles to reach the other side...addict or not...you can learn alot from this site.
Thanks again whats for your continued support and for your thread...I learned just how incredible you are from that thread and a true inspiration. I read all the support you offer too so many on this site and just want you to know how much I appreciate and respect the time and effort you put into encouraging all of us. Hope you have a great day!!!
Did I mention I'm at 30mg today???? LOL I knew it would get here just not this fast... I've eliminated 50mgs out of my daily intake since first of June. YEAH!!!!!!!! It feel soooooo good to post that number. I'm still feeling fine, a little off on the second and third day after the taper but nothing to really even document.
I have felt this drop but not really had bad side effects if that makes sense. I just feel a little off, little light headed and shaky before I take my second dose of the day at night. But the second day has been a little like this with the last few drops but by the end of the 3rd day I am good again. Just VERY thankful I'm not really feeling bad from any of the drops.
Today was a really good day. If you've read my whole thread you know I have a niece that I had been trying to help get onto subs. Well we finally got her on them today. I convinced the dr. to let her do it at home with my help and I've followed Roberts plan. They would have started her off on 8mg-16mg. But after a few doses she feels good at 2mg and 10hrs later she still feels really stable. I asked her to please set up her on account and maybe she can get one on one help from Robert. She didn't believe me about less being better when it comes to subs. All her friends are at 8mg or more and been on them for a long time.
At least she is in another town away from those distractions at the moment, I just have to keep my meds locked in a safe but whatever is necessary to save her young life....her father died last yr from an overdose of Oxycontin and Dilaudid. He was a Chief of Police and had no problem getting them and even sharing them with her, she was 16 the first time they shared a "stash" as she calls it. Hope the subs help her get to a place where she can grieve and feel all those feelings she has numbed for far too long. I know the good people on this site will support her....she really wants it this time and has done everything possible to ensure her success.
For me if all goes well I will be tapering to 25mg in a few days.. I still cannot believe how far I've come, it feels soooo good. Even if I have to slow down soon, I feel great about the progress so far. I feel better for the most part just a few odd feelings on day 2 or 3 but sleeping good and energy is still good.
Thanks to those who offer encouragement and that post their stories, they really help for my journey and to help my niece. She has her first NA meeting tomorrow, well the first in this city, she has been going on and off the last month.
Until my next taper....cause I know Im going to do just fine until then.
OK 2befree... YOU ARE DOING GREAT! The tapers can be felt - but you have the right attitude. It is managable.. and being addicted is NOT manageable, and withdrawing is nightmarish, so it is good you are committed to sticking to this and understand it and are staying strong!
Good work with the niece too! She can do it... I wish I knew more about tapering, but one thing I do know is that you have to be careful not to drop doses too fast. THen again, I was started on 16mg the first day ( but only for one day) then immediately dropped to 1mg and it was ok for me... So hopefully she will be alright. The one thing I would advise though is follow the taper religiously... she should not do drops in dose larger than the taper recommends or faster, as it can cause trouble... You are so great to help with that while managing your own addiction too!
Hang in there! I know you can do this! Update so we know how you are!
So glad things are still going so well for you. You are doing just AMAZING!!! Keep posting your progress so others can see it can be done!!
Thats great news about your niece too!! I remember you talked about her before. YOU are an amazing aunt. I know its difficult enough dealing with your own stuff but helping her at this time is really admirable.... Just remember you have to take care of YOU first and foremost!!!
Doing GREAT Kat!!!
Today was my first day at 25mg..and I was fine for most of the day but toward the evening I felt a little shaky and light headed..similar to how I've felt on day two of the last two or three drops. See how I feel tomorrow. I started not to post but then I remembered Im doing this for me, as a journal, a record of my progress. I hate that someone shady posted on my thread, but at least whats was also there for support and encouragement. Im sorry she is the one that got hurt from others on this forum, she is one of the few to support me.
My niece was gone when we woke up this morning. Dont know where she went, she knows no one here, unless she met someone at the two NA meetings she attended. More than likely she is trying to find a way back to the state she is from, at least she took the subs with her, maybe later she will use them and stick to a program.
She is on her own now, burned all bridges with the rest of her family and friends, guess her rock bottom is still to come, its just painful to see her do this at such a young age. No job skills, no college education, well just a GED. I love her but I have myself and my family that has to come first, it took me along time to get to a place where I understood I had to take a stand with her.
If you read this thread whats I hope you are doing well and thank you for taking the time to always post something postive on my thread, it really meant a lot to me. But you have to do what is best for you and I wish you the very best as you continue your journey!!!
Even with all the craziness of the day and recent forum events, I cannot help but be proud of myself...Im at 25mg!!!! Im starting to feel the drops but Im making good progress and that's what counts.
****To my niece = If you find yourself on this site and reading my thread, know that I love you. You can get clean and get the help you need but you have to want it and be willing to do the work, if I could LOVE you to being clean..it would have happened the day I found out about your addiction. DON'T worry about disappointing me, just concentrate on getting your life back.... Kat
Congrats on getting down to 25mg!! You are AMAZING!!! Please keep posting your progress.... People need to see that this is possible. I care a lot about you too and want to know how you are doing. Ijm here and will keep posting to you too
Im so sorry to hear that about your neice. Its so hard because we cant force people to get clean. If she doesnt want it, there is not a whole lot you can do!!!! I know how heart breaking that is. You are an amazing aunt Kat. Know you did everything you could
Took a little longer to stabilize on this last drop, but feel ready to reduce again today!! I'm definately going to slow it down a bit now and only reducing 2.5mg instead of 5-10mg as I've done with the previous reductions. So today will be the first day at 22.5mg. Maybe doing this will be a little better and allow me to adjust better within 4-7 days before the next taper. But will just see how my body responds.
I'm pretty good for 90% of each day, so nothing too difficult to manage at this point. Its the physical symptoms that bother me if any, get a little shaky, light headed, and a few GI issues maybe once a day (could be related to my crohn's). Sleeping OK, energy levels are good for at least 10-12 hrs out of the day, sometimes have that blah feeling and at times am more emotionally sensitive (but to be expected, and actually welcome being able to fully feel my emotions again!!), cannot really describe. I've had a very busy week and really have had little time to dwell on the whole taper and I think that really helps.
I'm still surprised to be this far along without any real significant issues from the taper. Its not that I don't feel the reductions now, its just much better than I expected it to be. BTW I set aside each weeks doses and at the end of the week somehow I had failed to take 15mgs, I know the amount set aside was correct, so this could have been the reason it took a little longer to stabilize!!!
I'm having to remind myself that slow is better and to not get down from having to take longer before reducing at this stage. The whole taper cannot be expected to go as smoothly and as fast as the beginning, but I'm still making progress towards the end goal. And remind myself that being at 22.5mg today (Oh YEAH!!) is a HUGE accomplishment!!!! So I have to tell myself, don't get impatient KAT!!!! When I started thinking how long it might take from this point at 22.5mg, to get to 0mg, when I'm only reducing by 1-2.5mg, is what seems to bother me. But I want to do it right and have a successful outcome, so I MUST not rush this and potentially set myself up for problems from going too fast.
My niece, who has been on and off subs(and pills) a few times this month, was arrested and now sits in jail with no one to get her out. I made the decision to not help her get out, it was difficult but its what I think is right for the moment. She made it back to her home state and city (God only knows how), and was caught sleeping in a vacant house that has been for sale for some time now, the real estate agent was friend that had tried to help her in the past. She has an opportunity to go from the jail into a type of house for women (similar to a half way house), I hope she takes the opportunity they are willing to offer to her. Its a really good program. The jail will only release her if someone pays the fine (believe it or not its only $150), but it will not be me this time.
Thanks WHATS.... for your continued support and encouragement, it really means a lot. CONGRATS (and a big high five) again on your days clean and off subs, your such an inspiration, along with being a really NICE and Supportive person. I only wish you the very best on your journey!!! It means a lot to me when I see you take the time to post on my thread and just want you to know its appreciated.
Im so glad you posted. Ive been thinking about you and always love reading your updates. What you have achieved since you came here is nothing short of remarkable!!! I mean that sincerely. Who cares how long it takes as long as you reach the destination. Do it correctly and you never ever have to do it again. I have complete faith that you are going to make it!!! Slow and steady wins the race
As for your niece, I completely understand where your coming from. You cant help someone who doesnt want to help themselves. Maybe this will be the wakeup call she needs. At least while shes in jail you know shes safe. I know its hard on you because you love her. Shes going to have to find her way just as we all have.
Your amazing Kat. You inspire me!!!
I'm good with the taper today so far, but the situation with my niece is very trying. Its good to hear your opinion. Even when I know I'm doing the right thing, I still feel some tinge of guilt. I do LOVE her sooooo much, we've always had a very close relationship, well that was until drugs began to change her personality. I hold no grudges like other family, I just refuse to keep riding the rollercoaster with her.
I can pray for her, and well the rest is up to her and the good Lord above. I think having dealt with an alcoholic father as a kid, and still dealing with him, I've learned the correct way to deal with her, it doesn't make it easy though. I hated having to go to all those meetings when I was a kid, but now I thank my mom and counselor's for urging me to stick to them. I find I've still have compassion, but appropriate boundries, just never thought one day I would have to apply all I've learned there to dealing with my niece.
The more threads I read here, the more hope I have for her when she does decide to make a change in her life. Its funny, I came here to help myself with this taper, but its not what keeps me here, its her situation and the heavy heart I carry knowing the life she is living....just to keep the true pain in her heart numb for another day.
Thanks again WHATs for your support, advice( every time I get ready to rush, I will remember your Slow and Steady wins the Race!!), and encouragement. Kat
I've now been at 22.5mg for a couple of days, and not quiet stable in my opionion, so will be at this dose a little longer. I'm definately starting to experience all those "nasty" side effects that come from tapering off of methadone when you get to the lower doses. Running nose, sneezing, chills, G.I upsets, shaky, light headed (had these last two on and off before this drop), mild anxiety for short periods, less of an appetite, etc.....
I would say I'm now feeling pretty good for 80% of the day, meaning the side effects are either mild or non-exsistent during this time period. I tried switching to dosing once a day, and that was not helpful, so I returned to twice a day dosing, and my sleep returned at night. I'm still sleeping good, but do find myself waking up 2 hours earlier than normal, but feeling pretty rested none the less.
I seem to run out of steam and start dealing with the nasty stuff late afternoon, early evening, but by waiting to take my last dose an hour before bed, I sleep better, so the price I pay for waiting a little longer between doses is worth a good nights sleep right now. I take my first dose a few hours after getting up each day. I've had to recently re-adjust the actual time I take the doses and now take them at the same time each day. I use to take my meds 3X a day but had to change that when I got to lower doses and it seems to have helped.
I'm sooo glad I made the decision to reduce by 2.5mg this time and not the 5mg - 10mg drops made previously. To be honest, I may just reduce 1mg - 1.5mg at a time until I get to 20mg, then see how I'm doing. It may take a little longer to get stable with the future drops, like it is taking with this most recent drop.
No matter what I'm experiencing at the moment, I'm certainly doing and feeling better than I thought possible at this stage. I know that I CAN and WILL be successful in this journey off of methadone. I now understand why Whats, and others on old threads, advice you Slow and Steady Wins the Race when tapering.
I'm very thrilled to say that by the time I return to my Pain Mgt Dr around the 12th of this month, I will at least be at 22.5mg (a nice drop from my 80-90mg prescribed dose)!!!!!
It may be getting a little harder, but I'm soooo ready to be done, its worth the fight. Thanks again Whats for seeing me through to this point!!!
You are amazing!!! Your doing so great.... I love reading your posts and the progress you are making. Youve come so far and now I think its ok to slow things down. Doesnt matter how you get to the destination as long as you get there. I have no doubt that you will. Your battling through those symptoms and keeping it going forward!!!
Im so impressed by you lady! This is how a methadone taper need be done! BIG BIG CONGRATS TO YOU!!!
Thanks as always Whats!!!!! It doesn't matter where I read one of your post, I always find something positive in your messages that help. Your just a gift to this site!!!!
UGGGHHH!!!! Its taking much longer to stabilize on this last drop. My runny nose and watering eyes make me look like I've been crying LOL. My daughter thought I had been watching some sappy movie, when in fact it was a comedy.
One good thing about getting up a little earlier from the disrupted sleep, is that I go out for a nice brisk morning walk, before its too hot out. My dog appreciates that part of it Im sure, less panting for him. I just don't relish the day when I start waking up even earlier or start having sleeping problems as sooo many report.
I have to remind myself that I eventually stabilized on the other doses, and I will do so on this dose, I just have to be PATIENT. My symptoms are not really too bad, more annoying at times, but rather brief in duration for the most part.
The biggest issue now, is one I cause myself. I just keep worrying I will get to a certain dose and I just won't stabilize and just draw out the process. Its stinkin' thinkin' as my southern granny would say to worry about tomorrow and the things we have no control over. So when these thoughts occur, I try and identify them immediately and make myself think better, more positve thoughts, and it works, but I have to be mindful of my thoughts and make an effort change them.
Even with how things are going at this moment, I still feel like its gone much better than I had thought possible. I'm very PROUD of the decison I made and for taking advantage of this time in my situation to attempt this, a time when I think I was most likely to have success.
When I do experience a difficult moment, and once its past, I somehow look back at it and find renewed strength in the fact I made it through and it passed....it didn't last forever.
Even after posting, I already feel better, just have more fight in me!!!! So I may not be going as fast as before with this taper, or as smoothly, but I'm still moving toward my goal, just a wee bit slower.... like a turtle LOL
My husband has taken over cooking most of our dinners for right now, and it really helps. I already struggle with appetite issues related to my crohn's, and now with this taper, my appetite is even less. But with him grocery shopping and cooking, I eat better and don't put it off. We eat healthy in our household any way but he is good at making sure I eat at least a little of everything I need, and cooks enough so that I can eat several small meals throughout the day..it has been a HUGE help. Its hard for me to cook when I have a poor appetite!! Thankfully, I've been on some wonderful vitamins and supplements already but have just stepped some of them up a bit and I've restarted my B12 shots, After reading how important this and exercise play in the wd and recovery process.
Hope you are feeling more stable today. As you get to the lower doses, you may just need more time at each dose. Your doing amazing though!!! I'm so proud of you and happy I get to follow along on your journey. You inspire me.
I really like what you said about looking back at those difficult moments and feeling renewed strength. I think that is so important. Embrace your triumphs!!! Be proud when you fight through those tough moments. This is not easy.... So every obstacle you crush is a huge accomplishment!!!
I hope you have a wonderful Sunday Kat!!!!
WOW cannot believe its been almost 10days since my last post. But I have really tried to keep busy and let my body adjust to each new drop, no matter how long it takes. It really took a little longer with this last drop but I did finally get to the point where I was feeling pretty good and stable again.
I forgot to post when I made my latest drop 2 days ago. I had planned on reducing just 1mg but I decided to make this my last large drop, and reduce down to 20mg, which meant a 2.5mg drop this time. I'm actually feeling fine so far with this drop. In the past, day 2 of my drop usually presented the onset of some wd symptoms, but nothing like that so far. I think by staying at my last dose a little longer, I may find I do better with this drop.
I will be seeing my PM doctor on Wednesday, and cannot wait to let them see how far I've tapered since my last visit. The nurses and other staff seemed to think I would not be sucessful in maintaining my reduced level, much less continue on with the taper, but I knew I would. I think they even doubted me at first but my blood work supported my claims.
I plan to keep up with the taper and not make any switches to other meds to finish the taper at this point. Other than the vitamins, healthy eating, and exercise, I don't plan to do anything else during the taper. My symptoms usually subside with time after each drop, it just takes a little longer to stabilize now than it did during the first part of my taper.
I'm very proud that I've eliminated 60-70mgs of methadone from my daily intake during a rather short time, or at least sooner than I thought possible.
When I recently had to take a little longer to stabilize on my previous drop, I considered going C/T and just getting it over with, but I'm just not in a postion healthwise to do that right now, and I'm thankful for that, because I think I'm more likely to have success by taking it slow from this point, listening to my body and dropping when its ready each time. The very next day after thinking of going C/T, I started to stabilize. I hope to use that as a reminder each time I want to hurry this thing up.
While I should not be in a huge hurry, I'm a little afraid I won't make the drop all the way down to 0mg before I need my next surgery in a few months. But I'm just going to keep dropping and stabilizing, and repeating this until either I reach 0mg or surgery day presents itself. I would rather be off the methadone by then and since I should only need the meds for 7-10days, I should do okay with something less potent, and easier to taper off of if necessary.
I feel like I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, its just a very long tunnel to travel through right now. I'm still thankful that the taper hasn't been too difficult and none of the wd symptoms stay around for very long...they do pass, just keep reminding myself of this when I wake up with runny nose and watery eyes LOL
It felt nice this week to be busy white water rafting with my daughter, camping, hiking, horse back riding etc.. I rarely had time to think about my taper or any wd symptoms. I slept good, and had good amount of energy. I just cannot do all the things I want to right now because of other health issues but being outdoors and enjoying my daughter was the best treatment I could use to off set any negative issues of this taper.
I don't know when my next taper day will be, and I've decided to just listen to my body at this point. For someone like me who likes to write out my plans, goals, schedules. etc... having to leave it up to my body to determine this has been the difficult part. But I realized from this last drop, I have to do it this way, it doesn't mean I'm not sticking to my goal or schedule, I'm still making progress and in the end that is what counts and its what will get me through this tunnel....
Thanks WHATs for your continued support and encouragement. Its always uplifting after reading your feedback. I've finally caught up reading your thread and hope you know your such an inspiration to me. I may not have many following or responding to my thread but what counts is the fact I have someone as amazing as you taking time out to offer me your support.
I hope to remember to post on my next taper day....and before that, if I have anything new to report or document. Maybe after seeing the doctor this week!! I'm at 20mgs!!!!!!!! It feels sooooo good to be able to write that and read it back!!!!!!
Im so sorry I missed this post. 20mg thats awesome!!! You are doing great. Just keep it nice and slow at this point. DOnt worry about whats to come a few months down the road. Remember its one day at a time. You are inspiring many including me. I know if you can do this, I really dont have much to complain about. You inspire me just as much as I do you!!! Thats the truth. I always enjoy reading your posts.
So how are you feeling now?? Keep charging ahead.... Remember your the bull, and just CHARGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Did really well with my last drop. And now its time to drop another mg!!!! So today is my first day at 19mg!!! Not sure how long I will be on this dose, but it will take as long as it takes......just as long as I stabilize.
My wd symptoms are pretty mild, just runny nose, watery eyes, fatigue, some minor anxiety until I get use to each new drop. I sleep pretty good for about 6-7 hrs each night, and I'm glad of that considering sleep is one of the major things to vanish when tapering and wd from narcotics.
The worst of the symptoms appear about 2 hours before my next dose is due. I'm only dosing twice a day now, as opposed to the four times a day doses I was on for almost 10yrs. But I make myself get up, shower, eat and do a few things around the house before I take my morning dose, I do this instead of relying on that dose to make me feel good enough to get up and start the day. Its amazing once your busy and forcing yourself to just get up and keep moving how much time will pass.
I'm increasing my exercse weekly and that helpswasn't convinced from reading on the threads that it could make that much of a difference but I am here to tell you that it is THE biggest thing that helps me right now. On days when I neglect to exercise, I feel worse, and if I miss two days in a row, I really start to feel low. I can change my whole mood and perspective with just a 15-20 min brisk walk, not too mention what more exercise does for me. Sometimes I have to really push myself to get going but once I do I never regret it, its just getting motivated that I seem to struggle with sometimes.
I enlisted my daughter to help out with that part....she is my exercise buddy and has made it her mission to see to it that I get the exercise I say I want and need, its hard to say no to her pretty little face!!!
If I could say one thing that is different from the first part of my taper to now is that things don't come as easy as they did in the beginning. I have to work at keeping my thoughts postive, stay motivated, and just adjusting to lower doses takes longer and come with more symptoms.
But I'm doing this, I'm making headway each day I get up and stick to my taper and my goals. Each drop in my dose, each time I motivate myself to get up and exercise, each time I replace a negative thought with something better, I am one step closer to my ultimate goal and I'm becoming a stronger better me along the way.
Thanks again Whats for always sending an encouraging post, despite your own situation at the moment. Your an amazing cheerleader to have, I just wish to see you feeling better soon. Hang in there it will come!!!
Thanks for your very kind message on my thread. I read it and replied there, also. I guess I had missed the fact that you're tapering on methadone rather than hydro! Big difference I am sure. Hope things go well for you. I will butt out, but I wanted to tell you that your post was super nice. I have stayed away from the methadone posts because I have no clue. Thanks for caring enough to write to me. BW
Thanks again for the last post. I have looked around and could not find any locked threads or banned people. How do I look for that. I just sort of went through a handful of old pages from the past. Is there an easier way? Now curiosity is killing me. How far back should I go to look for that?
It probably doesn't matter, but just curious about the person of the past.
I'll be out for awhile having coffee with family. Trying to resume my life a little more here and there. I will have to read your thread to see what you have been through. Thanks for being so nice and reaching out in a gentle way.
Look on this page for the person who has banned beneath their name...its a girls name. This person was formerly a very active member of this forum under another user name starting with a K, you cannot help but see the post from this person (K) from most peoples threads wanting to get off of subs, all the way up to mid July. Like I said, they were very kind, concerned, and helpful on the surface, but they turned out to be a real liar and betrayer.....i.e. like lying about a sister suddenly having a horrible accident to her later dying...garnering the support, time and sympathy from soooo many people here who were going thru their own REAL struggles.
But I wouldn't put a lot of time and energy into this person by reading their post, just thought you might need to understand this person appeared to be a very kind person, so you were not being considered unkind at all.
I would just move on, post where you like, but support Shu and the other few you really know. I've read some of your post that are excellent, but I would suggest most of the time you not get to specific on others threads about yourself...like I said, invite them to read your whole thread, they get a better picture that way. You have much to offer, I understand being lonely when pain and illness strike and keep you on the sidelines of life sometimes, its a world Im all to familiar with myself, even with a wonderful husband and daughter at home with me.
Hope this helps you move forward. Read my story when you feel like it, I came here to better understand how to taper off of methadone Im on for pain mg. Unlike others who've been on methadone before, I'm thankful it was there when I needed it most, it did give me the ability to live a more productive life for many years that otherwise would've been extremely difficult to function daily. But I'm ready to be off of everything possible, I certainly think its time to get off this particular drug right now and don't plan to ever return to it either.
I read most of your thread. I did find one of the entries on your thread and the person was banned. I see the helpful tone. I suspect the idea of dropping the dose was extreme, and the wording was scary a bit. I don't know a thing about methadone. I would probably not know a bad post from a good one unless it was about hydrocodone and a taper with that. I've tried to avoid a lot of the methadone posts because I am worthless. I will look for the others that start with a K, too. I am probably too dramatic in my posts. I have been a total drama queen since beginning the taper because I had no clue. I had no one to walk with me through it. None of my friends or relatives have done a taper or withdrawal. Just such a void of what to expect. As I have said before, some kind pharmacists were there for me at least. That's when I started calling detox centers. Then I got in to see a PM doctor about a week before the end of the taper. The hard part is that they are terrible about calling people back. So then I found the forum and hoped to find out if my situation was like others. I was so consumed in my own issues, I did not realize how my posts might affect others.
Anyway, best wishes with your taper and at least there is a good plan you have rather than winging it like I did for the first weeks. Thanks for explaining things in a kind and understandable way. Seeing at least one post by the person may help me understand what I may do wrong. I often talk off the top of my head, so I guess some thinking ahead might help. Thanks again.
Just checking to see how your feeling. how'd that last drop go? Thinking of you!!! Sorry I don't have a lot of experience tapering off methadone. I did take methadone at one time though. I was on 70mgs and switched to subs. I didn't taper though. I took my last methadone dose on a Thursday and switched to subs on a Monday. It was a rough transition. The sub doctor I went to was a scam. I spent 600.00 and he gave me enough subs for a week and sent me on my way. Needless to say after that week I Was very sick still.
Any way my point in telling you this is that your doing this the right way. Your doing great and you inspire me every time I read your thread!!!!!
Big hugs lady!!!!
Hugs to you Whats!!!
No matter what is going on with you, it seems your kind enough to still check in on me and I truly appreciate your actions!!
My last drop has been very easy, none of the side effects at all that I've had recently, kept thinking they might be around the corner (I know bad thinking), but I got by this time with a good outcome.
I dropped to 18mg today and I hope that the symptoms stay away or at least continue to be mild. I feel funny reporting that there are no issues, but I began to understand it might be the most important component to my post, it might mean I'm going about this taper the right way.
It just feels sooooo slow, but I know better than to rush it, and to complain about my situation is really petty. I know if I rush it, I could only find myself in a really bad place. I'm thankful that those that have responded to my thread all posted that advice and that you continued to remind me.
I hope your doing better, finding some days easier to cope and manage your anxiety. It will take time and as you know its work, I realised with my situation, if I was ever going to get out of the anxiety nightmare then I would have to work at it, sometimes it felt I would never go a day without being overwhelmed, but I kept practicing what worked, and things started to slowly improve little by little. Its just finding what will work best for you, that was the hardest part for me, a lot of trial and error, then once I found a good option it was wash, rinse, repeat LOL not literally, but just kept repeating the process that worked.
OMG (dont usually use that) but BW has just gone too far...no wonder you old timers had issues, WOW she came back with guns blazing, just unfortunate she was using bullets of misinformation again.
Hope I can keep reporting no symptoms with my future drops!!! And I have to remind myself that 18mg is still soooo much lower than where I started from and I will get there....going to change my name from Kat to Turtle... All kidding aside, I'm very proud of my decision and my progress so far, I forget that I never expected to be at this dose so soon, nor did I think the symptoms would be as mild. But none of this would have been the case if I had not gotten good information and feedback from this site early on, I would have messed everything up rushing it and thinking I was just going to have to suffer the whole way down to 0mg.
Your a great person to have in my corner Whats, thanks for sticking with me. I owe you big time when I hit 0mg, maybe we will run off for a girls weekend to some fabulous resort and get pampered....OK may not happen but a girl can dream.
Last edited by 2BeFreeofThem; 08-26-2013 at 10:52 PM.
Im so glad that you are still feeling so good!! Hey dont question it, just gooooo with it my friend. You know my BF has been tapering off morphine pretty much since I started here. I would get mad at him like he was being just sooooo slow with it and unnecessarily so, but honestly his symptoms have been pretty minimal. I mean some runny nose and yawning after he drops but over all he cant complain. Theres no need to rush things. Are you going to care in a year how long it took? No, youll just be happy to of accomplished it.
No need to thank me Kat. Its been a pleasure to support and get to know you!! You inspire me just as much!!!
Ive been practicing the meditation my therapist took me through. Its kinda >>>> it until I make it right now!! Im all for trying new things though. I havent been able to walk the last couple of days and I definitely am missing it. Going as soon as I get home from work today!
Keep on going Kat!!! Youve got this in the bag! Im proud of you
I have not been able to post much, been staying at the hospital with my father who recently had surgery. He had to have a vein (from a deceased person) about 2 feet long replaced in one of his legs, he no longer had a pulse in that leg, he was in excruciating pain. The surgery went well and now has a very strong pulse, before finding a pulse was even difficult using a doppler device (think that is what they called it).
Those who've read my previous post will know he is an alcoholic. Thankfully, he stopped drinking when he first realized something was very wrong with this leg, although he waited nearly 6wks in bed home alone before he called an ambulance. He only has my sister and I left, most of his friends have either passed away or were just fair weather friends, so most of the caretaking has been left to me the last two weeks.
He has now been moved to another hospital that has inpatient acute PT rehab department. Getting up and walking is very difficult at this moment but they are trying to get him to the point he can go home and at least make it to the restroom and kitchen.
I have to say dealing with him on a daily basis has been one of the most stressful times I can remember. I love my dad but his disease has caused so much pain and destruction over the years, and now when I am in a place of empathy and sympathy for him, its difficult to see how its effected his mind, so that even when he is sober for a few weeks, there is no longer a difference in the sober and drunk father, when years ago there was still a difference.
I will say that I'm glad to be in a place to help him though, even though his disease wrecked our family, he still managed to give me an incredible childhood when he was sober and often helped financially when my husband and I were in college and then when we were just starting out. I think this would be hard enough just caring for a parent but communicating with him right now is challenging, I think being sober is difficult for him, not being able to escape all the emotions and feelings, and he tends to be a hermit without the alcohol, so being around so many people in the hospital is causing him a lot of anxiety on top of everything else.
Anyway, I just dropped to 17mg three days ago and have not noticed this drop at all, I had very few symptoms with my previous drop as well, and I think its due to the fact I am giving my body longer before dropping now that I'm below 20mg. I see my PM doctor on Tuesday but don't expect any changes, just keep going down until I reach my goal. I will also be seeing my surgeon this month to discuss setting the date for one of the two operations I still need. I had hoped to be off the methadone by then but I may just have to alter my plans if I'm not but I will not let it deter me from my ultimate goal if this happens.
Once I finally accepted that going slow was the smart thing to do, my taper has went smoother, I don't stress about going so slow or feeling like I'm not progressing fast enough. I'm so glad I've followed this plan, its made it possible for me to be there for my family and my father. Now with the last two drops being very doable, I really feel like I CAN do this and do it without being in a constant state of stress and mild wds.
Thanks whats for your support and hope your doing better soon, I've got to catch up on your thread.
BTW when I last posted someone was leaving the forum but I return to see that they changed their mind!!!
I don't know anything about methadone, but if going slow is more tolerable, it's a good thing. Why suffer? Best wishes for your dad, etc. It's wonderful to spend time with parents as long as we have them. I miss mine a lot, but I have never regretted any second I spent with my mom and she was in the hospital a lot before she passed away. Best wishes to you with your dad and the taper.
I'm glad you checked in and gave us an update. I'm sorry things are so stressful, it seems like you have a lot going on. You should be really proud of sticking to your taper plan during all this.
And yes, things haven't changed. I think if anything there is more than one, if you pay attention it jumps out at you. I think most of us are just trying not to engage, hoping it will stop.
Check back in when you can. Take care of yourself, don't forget that. It's easy to forget about your own needs right now.