[SweetAndScared]

Originally Posted by Gasman2300

I was taking Norco for about 1.5 years to manage lower back and neck pain. I have had 2 neck surgeries for bone spurs and back surgery to perform 2 discectomies. I came on a source for free percocet, probably one of the biggest mistakes and decisions i could have made was to accept them. I went through 1000 percocets in 45 days, an average of 22 per day. I loved the euphoria and what seemed to be an elevated energy level, what a facade. The day before Thanksgiving this year i ran out and decided to go cold turkey, i could see it was affecting me in a negative way and my dependency level had really escalated. It is now Sunday, 4 days after stopping. I spent 3 days in bed sweating profusely with body and joint aches and at times severe depression. I thought about calling in some kind of intervention, but being the holidays i didn't think i could get the help i desperately needed. I am finally on my feet, the sweats have ceased and my energy level and mental well being is returning. I found a lot of fluids and crackers or whatever i could choke down helped a little. I have been addicted to many drugs in the past but have never experienced anything like this withdrawl. I also spent a lot of time praying to God to help methrough this. I own my own business and i know for a fact i would have lost it all had i not stopped. I only pray if the temptation arises again, i will have fhe fortitude to say no, i do not want to go through the hell i have lived the past 4 days. I'm sure i still have a ways to go, but it seems to get a little better each day. My heRt goes out to anyone going through this ordeal..... God Bless.

Did you experience any anxiety, heart racing, or panic? I'm not so worried about the physical illness, (although I know it's going to be awful), but I AM severely concerned about my already high anxiety. I worry for my heart and have read things about people going into cardiac arrest and respiratory arrest due to stopping this amount of Percocet 10/325. I just went thru 160 percocet 10/325 in 11 days. I've been having to take 4-5 a dose, 3 times a day and some nights I'll wake up at between 2:30am-5am in severe pain, and having to take 3-4. The night time dose only happens about 6-10 times in a 30 day period. Most of the time, if I have to take a dose in the middle of the night, I try to skip my mid-day dose, as to not take too many, AND to lower the risk of running out earlier. But now, I'm having trouble skipping the mid-day dose, as my mornings are very laborous. By noon, I'm back in severe pain again from the amount of work I've done sincemy morning dose.
I've told my Dr during the past 6 visits that I need help and cannot do this on my own, because if I do not take the medication, the pain causes me to also miss work, and fear that I will lose my own business as well. (I'm a model, and I do photoshoots almost daily, most of the time early in the mornings right after my morning dose.) I run a modeling company, and I have many emplyees under me that count on my being there on time, EVERY scheduled day, as I'm the one in the photos, and I also set up and design all of the sets and lighting, and make man of the major decisions when it comes to the end result of the photoshoot. This business is my dream and I finally accomplished it over a year ago, and I'm not willing to lose my business either. I don't make a ton of money AT ALL, but I'm working hard to make more and more as each month passes. HOWEVER- my Dr refuses to help me repair my tolerance level! He knows that I've had success with Clonidine in the past, but says he will not prescribe it, or any other med to aid in the extreme anxiety. (Clonidine also helps with the stomach cramps, chills, and aches). I don't know what else to do, as his philosophy is "Just stretch 'em out.", every single time I tell him that DOES NOT WORK, and he doesn't help, he only repeats himself. "Stretch 'em out." Without insurance, it's very difficult to locate another Dr that I know will work with me in this situation FOR SURE, without actually paying for a visit, and I cannot afford to do that. I can't hop from Dr to Dr spending all of that money as a self-pay patient, trying to find one that will help. They won't tell you over the phone if they will or wont...
But my extreme concern is the severe anxiety, being that I have been diagnosed with the worst form of anxiety a person can have. It runs in my family on both sides, so I got a double whammy. i failed to mention that I now have very high blood pressure, of which I believe to be a result of the Percocet, and I am on Metoprolol, 1 pill at bedtime. Been on it for a month and a half, and after being on it for a month, I went in for my routine Dr's visit/refill visit, and my BP was higher than it has ever been- and this is a month AFTER being put on the BP med. So between the anxiety and High BP, I'm very concerned. I know there is a chance that my BP will go down, being that high doses of percocet are reasons that cause high blood pressure, as I did not have high blood pressure before I began taking the Percocet. I'm wondering if the blood pressure will go down some, even while going thru withdrawls, only because I removed the medication that was causing my BP to be so high.
So I guess what I'm asking, is this- did you experience high levels of anxiety in the past 4 days? And if so, how bad was it, and did you take anything else to alleviate anxiety, or to help with any other withdrawl symptoms? OR, did you just stop taking the high dose of percocet that you'd ben taking cold turkey, and go thru the withdrawls on your own without weaning and without the help of other meds? Or did you wean your dose down to a smaller dose first, and then stop? I ask because I don't have the choice to wean. I have no more medication at all, and after taking so many every day, I'm afraid that stopping such a high dose so abruptly is too dangerous, (not that I have any choice).
If you stopped your high dosage cold turkey, and went thru about 4 days of the awful discomfort, then I'm a bit less worried... I think I can control the anxiety if I know someone else stopped an extemely high dose abruptly like I'm about to do, and I can suffer thru the physical discomfort, knowing that there's someone out there that was so successful doing it this way. (not to imply that it was successful to be so uncomfortable for 4 days, as even tho I'm about to do the same, I feel deeply sorry that you had to go thru this as well.)
I thank you for your resonse, and hope to hear back again from you! So far, you have calmed me some, adn I can't say thank you enough. I hope to hear back from you soon with some help with my further questions
Bless You for your kindness
-M

[melinda7.5]

Originally Posted by SweetAndScared

Did you experience any anxiety, heart racing, or panic? I'm not so worried about the physical illness, (although I know it's going to be awful), but I AM severely concerned about my already high anxiety. I worry for my heart and have read things about people going into cardiac arrest and respiratory arrest due to stopping this amount of Percocet 10/325. I just went thru 160 percocet 10/325 in 11 days. I've been having to take 4-5 a dose, 3 times a day and some nights I'll wake up at between 2:30am-5am in severe pain, and having to take 3-4. The night time dose only happens about 6-10 times in a 30 day period. Most of the time, if I have to take a dose in the middle of the night, I try to skip my mid-day dose, as to not take too many, AND to lower the risk of running out earlier. But now, I'm having trouble skipping the mid-day dose, as my mornings are very laborous. By noon, I'm back in severe pain again from the amount of work I've done sincemy morning dose.
I've told my Dr during the past 6 visits that I need help and cannot do this on my own, because if I do not take the medication, the pain causes me to also miss work, and fear that I will lose my own business as well. (I'm a model, and I do photoshoots almost daily, most of the time early in the mornings right after my morning dose.) I run a modeling company, and I have many emplyees under me that count on my being there on time, EVERY scheduled day, as I'm the one in the photos, and I also set up and design all of the sets and lighting, and make man of the major decisions when it comes to the end result of the photoshoot. This business is my dream and I finally accomplished it over a year ago, and I'm not willing to lose my business either. I don't make a ton of money AT ALL, but I'm working hard to make more and more as each month passes. HOWEVER- my Dr refuses to help me repair my tolerance level! He knows that I've had success with Clonidine in the past, but says he will not prescribe it, or any other med to aid in the extreme anxiety. (Clonidine also helps with the stomach cramps, chills, and aches). I don't know what else to do, as his philosophy is "Just stretch 'em out.", every single time I tell him that DOES NOT WORK, and he doesn't help, he only repeats himself. "Stretch 'em out." Without insurance, it's very difficult to locate another Dr that I know will work with me in this situation FOR SURE, without actually paying for a visit, and I cannot afford to do that. I can't hop from Dr to Dr spending all of that money as a self-pay patient, trying to find one that will help. They won't tell you over the phone if they will or wont...
But my extreme concern is the severe anxiety, being that I have been diagnosed with the worst form of anxiety a person can have. It runs in my family on both sides, so I got a double whammy. i failed to mention that I now have very high blood pressure, of which I believe to be a result of the Percocet, and I am on Metoprolol, 1 pill at bedtime. Been on it for a month and a half, and after being on it for a month, I went in for my routine Dr's visit/refill visit, and my BP was higher than it has ever been- and this is a month AFTER being put on the BP med. So between the anxiety and High BP, I'm very concerned. I know there is a chance that my BP will go down, being that high doses of percocet are reasons that cause high blood pressure, as I did not have high blood pressure before I began taking the Percocet. I'm wondering if the blood pressure will go down some, even while going thru withdrawls, only because I removed the medication that was causing my BP to be so high.
So I guess what I'm asking, is this- did you experience high levels of anxiety in the past 4 days? And if so, how bad was it, and did you take anything else to alleviate anxiety, or to help with any other withdrawl symptoms? OR, did you just stop taking the high dose of percocet that you'd ben taking cold turkey, and go thru the withdrawls on your own without weaning and without the help of other meds? Or did you wean your dose down to a smaller dose first, and then stop? I ask because I don't have the choice to wean. I have no more medication at all, and after taking so many every day, I'm afraid that stopping such a high dose so abruptly is too dangerous, (not that I have any choice).
If you stopped your high dosage cold turkey, and went thru about 4 days of the awful discomfort, then I'm a bit less worried... I think I can control the anxiety if I know someone else stopped an extemely high dose abruptly like I'm about to do, and I can suffer thru the physical discomfort, knowing that there's someone out there that was so successful doing it this way. (not to imply that it was successful to be so uncomfortable for 4 days, as even tho I'm about to do the same, I feel deeply sorry that you had to go thru this as well.)
I thank you for your resonse, and hope to hear back again from you! So far, you have calmed me some, adn I can't say thank you enough. I hope to hear back from you soon with some help with my further questions
Bless You for your kindness
-M

Hi sweetandscard
I was taking oxycontin and percocet,hydros all at the same time for about three years...LOL and klonopin and soma...and probable some that I forgot about...LOL I tapered off of them,but I did have panic attacks for awhile,,,but they went away anxiety runs in my family also..
If you can do a taper that would make the withdrawals a little easer,but if you go cold turkey you can just get it over with,,If you have a good week to do it that is the way I would go.I also had high blood pressure when I was taking my drugs,but now I exercise and watch my diet and its now under control with out any high blood pressure meds...
Let us know how you are doing and what your going to do...
Talk to you soon, Melinda

[SweetAndScared]

Originally Posted by melinda7.5

Hi sweetandscard
I was taking oxycontin and percocet,hydros all at the same time for about three years...LOL and klonopin and soma...and probable some that I forgot about...LOL I tapered off of them,but I did have panic attacks for awhile,,,but they went away anxiety runs in my family also..
If you can do a taper that would make the withdrawals a little easer,but if you go cold turkey you can just get it over with,,If you have a good week to do it that is the way I would go.I also had high blood pressure when I was taking my drugs,but now I exercise and watch my diet and its now under control with out any high blood pressure meds...
Let us know how you are doing and what your going to do...
Talk to you soon, Melinda

Thank you for responding, Melinda- I truly appreciate it! I went and saw an urgent care Dr and let him in on my situation. Also told him that I had success in the past wth Clonidine, but he also ignored that. The odd part of this is that they prescribed a months worth of Clonidine when I took it the one time, and told me to take 1, 2 to 3 times a day between a regular dose of percocet. As in, stop taking the 4 to 5 per dose that I was having to take, and take the 2 per dose that I was prescribed, then take a Clonidine about an hour later (between each dose for the day), making the withdrawl effects MUCH more tolerable. Which it did. But the funny thing, was that I didn't even have to take that many of the Clonidine, even with such a high toleance- I only had to take 1 a day in place of my mid-day dose of Percocet, and within a week, I was back to normal. This was (I think) a year or so ago, and it helped enormously. I didn't even need the entire prescription, -I was back to normal in a week, not a month, and made the mistake of discarding the remaining Clonidine. I was not at all dependant on it. This is why I can't figure out why I can't get a Dr to precribe this med, so I've given up on that.
The outcome of my recent visit to urgent care was a small script of the percocet, and another script for Xanax, as this Dr not only knew I may need a bit more of the Xanax to get thru this, but he also reminded me of the danger of stopping a benzo abruptly. (Iknow this first hand, as my sister did this and had 6 Grand Mal Seizures and almost died). BUT, he ignored me when I said that with the amount of anxiety I endure regularly, even when taking all of my meds, I knew I needed to use the Clonidine again to wean me off. As I said, I didn't become dependant on it before, and didn't even need the full prescribed dosage, -was even able to even go an entire day a couple times without Percocet while taking the Clonidine, when I had little pain.
Anyway, I now have about 11 or 12 10/325 Percocet left, and I am starting today by taking only 1 for a mid-day dose, and 2-3 this evening. Tomorrow, i will take 2 in the morning, 1 mid-day and 2 in the evening. I will continue to go down until they run out, (which will be quickly, as, again, I only have 11 or 12 left). Then, I will hope that when I have none left, the symptoms of withdrawl will be a little easier, and not last very long. Hearing your story has inspired me a lot- THANK YOU!- as well as Gasman's story-THANK YOU, GASMAN!-, and I am keeping your story as well as his story in the front of my mind as I do this. It really is wonderful people like you that I KNOW i couldn't do this without. Knowing that I'm not alone, and not the only one who is doing this, or has done this, reeeeally helps a lot. I'm still scared to death, and I know that has a lot to do with my anxiety, but I also do not have anyone here to support me. I'm on my own on this one. My family is not close, and my parents despise me. (They HATE the fact that I'm about 70% tattooed, and not only a tattoo model, but a fashion model as well, and they think my choice to work hard at becoming a more successful model is a joke, and "Not a real, or 'ideal' job".) I own and run a successful modeling business setting up not only myself, but many other models for photoshoots, and setting up photographers with models. I make good money, so I don't know why they hate it so much, but it all began with the tatoo's. Now that they see me on signs or posters in public, mostly for tattoo shops, they have disowned me saying that they don't want our friends and family seeing me, "Looking like street trash with the tattooed ruining my body". (All of my tattoo's are professional, VERY well done, and VERY tasteful- no blood and gore, etc. Only colorful and beautiful artwork.) Sorry for the long description, but you get the point. I'm here alone, single, have VERY busy friends, and have no one to turn to while I go thru this.
So again, thank you, and I will try to keep posting if I don't get too ill. i may go ahead and move my laptop from the kitchen table to the bed, as I have a very llarge bed, and use the other side to set my books, magazines, etc. I'll just add the laptop, adn try to use all these things to distract me from anxiety
You're an angel for sharing your experience with me, and "Gasman" as well You helped so very much with your story of getting thru something so extreme in just 4 days! Your strength AMAZES me, and you should be soooo proud of yourself. Both of you are helping push my strenth level higher and higher!!!
Hopefully, I'll be posting back soon.
xox-Scared But Feeling Stronger...

[money_chick]

Well, I think they wont give clonidine because its a blood pressure med, of which you are already on one. So, they dont want your pressure to drop too low.

You may get more responses in the Need To Talk forum, if you start your own thread. Some of us forget to check in here.

I think if you have xanax and get yurself some immoudium, valerian root and some easy foods ( soups, etc) you could hunker down and do it.

I will say, it wont be very easy.

Come to the other forum, just beneath this one, and start your own thread.

[SweetAndScared]

Originally Posted by money_chick

Well, I think they wont give clonidine because its a blood pressure med, of which you are already on one. So, they dont want your pressure to drop too low.

You may get more responses in the Need To Talk forum, if you start your own thread. Some of us forget to check in here.

I think if you have xanax and get yurself some immoudium, valerian root and some easy foods ( soups, etc) you could hunker down and do it.

I will say, it wont be very easy.

Come to the other forum, just beneath this one, and start your own thread.

Thank you, and I will go to the other forum now...
I do know that the Clonidine is another BP Med, but the one I'm currently on, (Toprol) hasn't been working. It's the 50mg strength, and even when my Dr had me start taking 2 a day because of this, it still hasn't made a change. So I suggested that maybe he switch me off of the Toprol, and let me try the Clonidine for a month or so to see if it did help my BP level, AND do what I needed it to do with my tolerance. I've only been on the Toprol for 1 month and 3 weeks. The first month he had me on one(1) 50mg Toprol a day at bedtime, then when he realized it hadn't helped at all, he started me on the two(2) a day dosage for the last 3 weeks, and I've been checking my BP at Walgreens every 2-3 days, as I was told to do by my Dr and it's still making no change. I didn't have high blood pressure until I had to start taking more of my percocet, and I know that one of the side effects of high doses of pain medication can be a rise in blood pressure. So, if he swapped me over to the Clonidine for a month until my follow up visit, we may have some luck in killing 2 birds with one stone. He told me at my last visit that I wasn't in any immediate danger with my BP level at this time (even tho it was alarmingly high for a 29 year old), but that if it stayed consistently high, we had to figure out why it was so high, and fix the problem. Well, being that my BP level was NEVER high until my tolerance went up so drastically, and I had to start taking a higher dosage, I'm pretty sure thats the problem. And that would be another reason on my list of wanting off the meds. When Melinda said that her blood pressure was under control now that she's off the pain meds, I remembered that conversation with my Dr, and the fact that I've never had high blood pressure until raising my doses. So, being that I took a much lower dose this morning, I just went over to Walgreens, (it's like half a block from my house), and lo and behold, my blood pressure IS lower than usual, when yesterday afternoon, when I took a higher dose, my BP was quite high.
I also remember my Dr mentioning that he "just didn't like using Clonidine, he'd rather have me lower the dosage on my own", as to where I responded (again), that I was having trouble doing that due to my anxiety and pain level. I guess some Dr's just seem to think the patient has NO idea at all what's good for them, even after experience.
Anyway, I'll go ahead and go over to the other thread now. Just wanted to add my reply to this last post of yours
Thank you so much!!
-SBS (I have a nickname that I've gone by for many years, so if you see me start signing messages with "Loo", that would be why. It started with "Baby Loo Tattoo" and now, most call me either "Baby Loo", or just "Loo")

[1LuckyDuck77]

In 2006 I was in a serious motorcycle accident. Ive been taking the highest dose of percocet on the market....my doctor would perscribe me 100 pills at a time...that would last me about 2 weeks? I was having relathionship trouble and was going to move back to my home state so I went to my doctor and asked him to refill all my scrpts on file so that I woul dhave them once I got home because it wont be established with a doctor or have insurance coverage there. He informed me th eonly way to refill my pain med would be to lower the dose or the insurance wouldnt cover a refill so soon since I already had pain meds.... my finace decided he wanted to work things out so I stayed......needless to say my perscription for a lower dose 5/325 ...I was taking more then 3 time the amount to compensate for what I was used to taking...the bottle of 90 pills lasted me just over a week or two....when I returned to the doctor and explained that i was staying towork things out but was out of my pain meds he basically said too bad and go get help....spoke to me in a way like I was junkie...Ive never had a doctor speak to me in such a way...i felt so demoralized and humiliated. So I left the office feeling like a complete loser...nurses and staff looking at me funny almost like they were judging me....Now im almost 4 days in cold turkey with no meds...mind you I do have a mild heart condition, MVP, (mytral valve prolapse) I have a severe irregular heartbeat that throws pvc's. I dont have the energy to move, im in pain, im sick to my stomace and constantly in the bathroom, in fact at 4 am I woke to excrutiating pain in my stomeace so I got up to go to the bahroom, fellover when I stood up and walked into a wall and got a bloody nose ( I can navigate my house with my eyes closed) my motor skills seem off, I feel confused, my breathing isnt normal and all around I just dont feel right. I have a doctors appointment today but I know it will get me nowhere. Ive vouluntarily enrolled in an addiction rehab program but In my personal opinion I feel it's inhumane to allow a patient to suffer this way.

[1LuckyDuck77]

I myself am a woman with tasteful artistic tatoos that cover half my arm and back and it does seem like when you go to the doctor, they take one look at you and are quick to judge.....what a sad society when a beautiful woman cant express herself and be unique without being frowned upon. we're all in the same struggle chin up kiddo

[PerkyOnPercs]

Hi Everyone,
I need help
I have been taking percocets for about 8 months now, it started with one 2xs a day, then 3 2xs a day and now I am up to 3 3xs a day. I REALLY want to get off of them, I have tried (and failed) twice before. I usually make it to 2 days with the sore legs,fatigue, etc (I don't get nauseus (sp?). I am wondering what to do, and what to expect after the 2nd day? Should I go see my Dr for some meds that will ease the withdrawl, or just do it on my own? When can I expect to feel better? I know it may take months to be mental better, but as far as physical symptoms...??? Any advice you guys can supply would be great.

[melinda7.5]

Hi Perky
if you could just hang on for a couple more days you will make it...and now you found us and we can help you...
So just let us know when you want to give it another try...
Talk to you soon, Melinda

[Al7yrsgoing]

I'm sorry I can't help with advice for those of you seeking it as I am in a similar situation. I have had back surgery and some arthritis causing me extreme discomfort. I say discomfort because it's not like it was pain that in my younger years I couldn't deal with and just call soreness. As I have aged I don't heal the way I use to. After back surgery I wasn't able to golf and do the normal things I use to be able to do without taking my percocet. I have been taking them for about 6 years or so now and went from two 5mg's a day to three 7.5's. Sometimes I take two and sometimes four but for the most part I take them as prescribed. I am just beginning to think they are causing me these panic attacks I seem to have just started having. I just get this feeling like I am claustrophobic and need to break outside of my body. It is the wierdest feeling I have ever had and very odd that after 6 years I would attribute it to percocet. I also take zanax for sleep but only one pill or possibly two and strictly for sleep. So here I am all these years following instructions and not abusing or using outside the suggested dosages. The only thing I feel I have been doing is taking the percocet as scheduled even when I am not in pain.
Well I decided yesterday that this entire cycle needs to change. I am at least going to attempt to see if I can just deal with the pain. I have an extreme tolerance for pain medications as I have even woke up in the middle of a couple of surgeries though these weren't under total anastesia they were in surgeries where I woke up screaming in pain and the DR. freaked that I was awake (not sure what relevance that has here). Anyway I don't like pain and pain killers don't affect me like they do a lot of people... they don't put me to sleep anyway. I decided a couple of days ago to go down to two a day and I think in a couple of days I am going to try and go down to one pill a day and then stop. I started taking vitamins as well. I know now isn't the best time to quit smoking but I started that venture a couple of days ago as well and have managed only one smoke two days running. I guess I am figuring if I am going to be miserable for a few days I might as well be really miserable. I even asked my dr. to give me something other than zanax for sleep because I don't want to take any drug that people look at in that stereo typical way. He said no.... he said ambien and all the others didn't work all that well and were expensive so if xanax worked that I should just keep taking them. I have read through a bunch of these blogs and see you folks being a tremendous support system for each other. I normally consider myself pretty strong minded but I am betting I have my work cut out for me here after taking these things for almost 6 years. I will help you all out as much as I can in offering my experiences to you. I have heard the xanax actually can help with some of these withdrawls but the last thing I want to do is overmedicate with something else to mask another issue. I think I will just tough it out.... I have my wife to lean on as she knows all about my use since I have been on them for pain for this long. I told her I think it's just time to quit and see how bad the pain still is.
I wouldn't classify myself as an addict but I would say that I am dependant as my doctor and I have discussed. If I have to make a choice of live a normal life and continue to use them at three a day, I will. I just need to have this sanity check to make sure I can stop if I need or want to and that the pain is still really there.

[2daysandcrying]

So i've been reading all these posts and i'm 2 days in. cold turkey. i really didnt take as many as most people on here did. 3 perc 10's a day. The withdrawl so far has consisted of me smoking a lot of weed which i normally dont smoke at all and considering getting drunk to help me get through. Funny thing is i started taking pain pills first vicodin then percocet brfore i was diagnosed but i was having lower back pain. i was getting worse and i was scared something major was wrong and i didnt want to go to the doctors because i couldnt chance being put in disability. Couldnt afford it. Well i finally broke down(meaning my wife shoved me in the car and took me to the hospital to get x-rays done) come to find out i have some disc problems. bulged or compressed or slipped not sure yet have to go to specialist this thurs. to find out. Well now i'm thinkin ok i can finally have some pain killers prescribed to me and i wont have to keep spending so much money on them. Thats the part that has strained my marriage. No luck. i have been givin nothing and have no money to buy them. I can't keep treating my family like this. So i went cold turkey. had 1 perc 10 and 2 vic 10's on friday last one around 6p. it's now sunday 4:15 and i'm ok. i'm uncomfortable. my head feels stuffy. my lower back really hurts. i feel a little weak. My biggest problem is i'm a welder and cant afford to take any days off so i have to go to work tommorrow. Man i really hope i feel a lot better tommorrow. gues i just needed to gets this off my mind and reading all these helped me realize i'm not a junkie or a butterhead. there are a lot of other people going through the same thing i am right now. Thanks for helping me through this time and giving me a place to release my feelings.

May God bless us all.

[stage 4]

This is truly day one for me. I am only 34 years old, was diagnosed with aggressive breast cancer at the age of 28, have had about 12 surgeries and an endless supply of percocet. I am stage 4, incurable, as the cancer is in my lungs and bones now. I am in a considerable amount of pain quite often, and turned to the readily prescribed meds to cope. I get 250 at a time from my doc---any time I want it......honestly, I think the viewpoint they take is, with someone who is terminal like myself (though I hope to be here for years to come!), addiction is the least of my concerns. Sure.

I have been taking 2 pills every 4 - 6 hours for a long, long time. Years. I will say I've NEVER taken more than the prescribed/recommended dosage, and I've never obtained the pills illegally. I have, however, hidden a dose or two from my husband, always with the internal justification that I "didn't want him to worry about me." Well, I've noticed over the past few months major difficulty sleeping---I can't lie still, I'm restless, tossing and turning. So, I get up, take a couple of pills, and in a half hour I'm good. Anxiety is an issue, rapid heart rate....though I DO have a script for Xanax, but never take it. I've had that bottle for almost two years.......

When I have gone an entire day without my pills, I feel (hard to describe it) like I'm in a dream state---like I'm light headed, or dizzy, or everything is a bit surreal. I am just today realizing that I may have an addiction. May be experiencing withdrawls. And I have a call into my doctor. Not an easy thing to admit, is it? I'm not what I used to consider the "stereotypical addict..." I have two children, a beautiful home, three cars, involvement in church, I take ballet and martial arts......I know now that there IS no "stereotypical addict." I think shame has prevented me from getting to this point sooner. Is that normal?? Are the feelings I'm having physically an indication of addiction, even if mild? Should I wean myself off or try to quit cold turkey?? My situation is this---I want to STOP feeling as if I HAVE to take percocet daily, serveral times a day, but I don't want it to be completely unaccessable to me.....as I mentioned, I have stage 4 cancer (there is no stage 5, in case you're wondering!), and the bone cancer really and truly does cause horrendous pain at times. Is this possible? For me to only take it when I need it? How??? How can I deal with this, on top of everything else (ie end of life issues at 34 years of age......)??? So sorry for the ramble, not even sure if I have made any sense....but reading this thread has helped me feel as if I've done the right thing in seeking advice from my doc....

Thank you so much.

[SlpHppyGrl]

Your paragraph really helped me to understand more about this addiction...Thanx so much!

[Aquilegia]

Aaaaaaarrrrrggghhhh! Thanks to a sanfu at the Doc's office and the Pharmacy I've started my weening off process with 2 days of cold turkey...d'oh! I've had 3 spinal fusions (L4-5 twice and L3-L4 last October), and a discectomy of the disc between L3-L4 about 2 years ago...combined with arthritis is a recipe for chronic back pain. Been taking 5 10/325's for about 2 years now.(thank God I'm not eating 30-40 of 'em a day like some folks here...I truly wish you luck). The restless legs have set in...slept an hour last night. I don't think there is a square inch on my body that doesn't ache. Just knowing there are others out there suffering the same fate has morbidly made me feel somewhat better. I wish all of you the best of luck and ask for the same!

Thanks!
Aquilegia

[melinda7.5]

Hi Aquilegia
How is day 3 going, I Have DDD so I understand the pain your in...
I was just wondering how you are doing...
talk to you soon, Melinda

[SlpHppyGrl]

Originally Posted by Aquilegia

Aaaaaaarrrrrggghhhh! Thanks to a sanfu at the Doc's office and the Pharmacy I've started my weening off process with 2 days of cold turkey...d'oh! I've had 3 spinal fusions (L4-5 twice and L3-L4 last October), and a discectomy of the disc between L3-L4 about 2 years ago...combined with arthritis is a recipe for chronic back pain. Been taking 5 10/325's for about 2 years now.(thank God I'm not eating 30-40 of 'em a day like some folks here...I truly wish you luck). The restless legs have set in...slept an hour last night. I don't think there is a square inch on my body that doesn't ache. Just knowing there are others out there suffering the same fate has morbidly made me feel somewhat better. I wish all of you the best of luck and ask for the same!

Thanks!
Aquilegia

Geez....where do I start! It's been 18 yrs and gradually gotten to be more and more....Now I like them even more is the problem....I wanna do something, anything but lay around and think all day and nite....they used to get me moving but not in the last 3 mths since taking more and more in a days time. I wanna stop taking them so much, but I don't want to give them up completely.
I wish they would help more with the pain when I have bad pain but I've begun taking to many in a days time for them to help me when I really need them to help me. This is not good. I should try the cold turkey maybe and see how I feel. I've read some horror stories about it and I haven't read about anyone being on them for 18 yrs so I may have a little or lot of a harder time getting off these pills. any advise is welcome from all! I gotta get off these pills...I think they are affecting my life and my personality and who knows how I would be if I didn't take any of them....surely not me....I was 27 when I broke my back...now 44....and I think its had to do something to change me even If I don't really see it.
Pray for me!!!....Everyone that reads this that I get off of them, or maybe just cut down on them so that I can find my true self again.