[Keith Hardwick]

morticia, lisa girl, it's great that you have found NA. I'm in it down here in Louisiana. I have 2 and a half years clean but I have only been going for 1 year now since I got out of prison. I went to meetings for 2 weeks before that so i was clean when I went in and no one can take that from me.

Yes, getting a home group is very important, and make a commitment to yourself to go to ALL of your homegroup meetings. That's when things really started to change for me. That's when I started getting involved in service. I became "a part of". Now I'm the area webmaster and part of the PI subcommittee...it's all very exciting.

Keep coming back, no matter what, and everything else will fall into place. And if it all seems too much, read the June 8th daily meditation...you're right where you need to be.

[tamara02]

hi morticia ,im glad you had a good time last nite,no i didnot go to a meeting,I do want to go to an na meeting tonite,but info.dosent have any listings,did you say you had an 800 no. for n/a let me know thanks tamm

[LISA GIRL]

Hi All. Jut checking in to say hello. 4 weeks ago today I started the sub. That's the good news.

Bad news is I am having technical difficulties with my laptop to which I am completely addicted. In a pinch I will use my desktop, but it's my office which gets really WARM and no tv in here.. I get SO frustrated by things like that. I REALLY wanted a chill pill but of course knew that was not the solution. Instead I called the "geek squad" and they will come over tomorrow and fix the thing (probably something very simple) for $150. I hate computers.. SO jealous of you CHRISH to have yours working so quick and new like.

I guess I should be thankful I have the desktop with a working letter S. (HAHAHAHA PATMAMMA) Guess I should also be glad that in 4 weeks I saved about $1500 from not taking percs... that geeksquad bill won't hurt so bad.

Anyway had to vent for a minute. Hope everyone is great today.

[LISA GIRL]

Hey Keith .. Welcome!! I guess our posts crossed.. .. didn't see you before I posted my last one.
I'm not in NA .. not yet... but reading Morticia's posts makes me think I would benefit a lot from going.. Maybe I'll look into it this week. Glad to have you here!

[morticia]

Lisa~ Congrates on 4 weeks thats great so saved that much money? Fantasic, keep up the good work the sub is working good for you huh? thats great! N/A meetings are great they are alot of fun you should go for it. Sorry to hear about your laptop i know whay you mean about being addiced to your pc i cant live w/o mine.

Keith~ welcome thank you for your encouraging words about N/A congrates on 2 years clean , ive only been 4 weeks clean i try to make a meeting everyday , but i decided to go 4 times a week .

Tamm~ thank you yes i had a great time , heres the number for the national drug Abuse hotline 1-800-259-7115 just ask for the N/A hotline for your area, keep up the good work i/m proud of you!

take care hope to heare from y'all soon.

Clean Date:10/16/06

[:I]

luv n hugs Clarkie

[patmamma]

Hi All!
I feel a lot better toay, I ha 12 hour5 of re5t la5t niht!

I am 5till 5ore, but clo5er to healthy!

Very funny Li5a! I am 5orry to kee torturin you all, bt until I feel better, I cant et thi5 fixe! I bet you all really want me to et better NOW! LOL!

Have a nice mornin!
Chri5tie

[tamara02]

hi guys ,hope all is going well!!!morticia thanks for the 800 #,lisa did you say you have lots of energy w/ the sub. how much are you taking?im on 82x daily,no energy,mamma,glad your pain is subsiding,will write more later love ya'll tammy

[morticia]

Patmomma~ Glad your feeling better today are you still on pain meds?,i hope you get your keyboard fixed soon but i think its cute lol

your welcome Tam anyway that i can help. good luck with the number.

take care talk to yall soon.

Clean Date :10/16/06

Just For Today

[:I]

luv n hugs Clarkie

[patmamma]

Morticia, Ye5, unfortunately, I am 5till takin them! I am able to make my5elf wait loner until I take them, an cant wait to not take them anymore! It i5 funny how lon I took them, an wante them, an now I cant wait to not take them!

I fell a5lee la5t niht at five, an wa5 out until 5 thi5 mornin! No ambien! I am toa5t from all of the healin an 5uch!

That i5 all the torture for toniht! Thank you all for bearin with me!
Chri5tieatmamma

[LISA GIRL]

Yep Morticia.. I was spening between $40-$50 per day at the end on the percs. That is the main reason they had to go. And I knew it would have only gotten worse. Probably a good thing I didn't have a legitimate reason for them and a prescription, or I may have never quit. I will definitely think about the NA.. kind of scary though.. just need to DO it.. that one time and I would probably love it. We'll see...

Tammy.. The first few weeks on the sub I had HUGE energy. Like REALLY CRAZY like being on speed or something. It settled down in week 3 and I just have average energy I guess.Definitely more energy than when I was taking percocet. I am taking between 6 and 8 mg per day.. usually 6. You are taking 16 mg per day? That sounds like a lot to me but I guess your doctor knows best? Not always though. You might try cutting the pills in half and seeing if half a dose makes you feel any better? I have never heard of anyone being so chronically tired on the sub as you.. usually people are talking about feeling more energized.(of course that's only what I've seen) ... are you taking anything else with them that could be making you tired?

Patmamma.. Hope you and your computer get better soon! At least you are well rested...nice to be able to sleep like that without pills.

Li5a.

p.s. After calming down last night I actually fixed the laptop on my own.. Restore system feature.. didn't even know that existed. It takes a snapshot of the computer settings every so often and you can go back to a particular day (before you ****ed up your computer) and restore the settings to what they were on a given day. HAHAHA. You guys probably already know this but to me it was a miracle I just stumbled across.... kind of like this board and suboxone... and I didn't have to shell out cash for the "geek squad." Yea!

I posted under "Need to talk" please read that. Or just wish me luck....i'm at about 4hours clean right now, by midnight I will be 5 hours and so I am calling my clean date 11/7/06. That day is not here yet and if i sleep tonight i'm giong to wake up and want to take hydrocodone! i just know it! So wish me luck in quitting. I'm sure i'll be back on here talkin about "11/8/06, and then 11/9/06 hahaha

[morticia]

welcome my 20sRgone,
4 hours clean thats a great start your on the right path to recovery, have you considered sub? its a drug that helps with the w/d s just read some of the ppls posts about it from what i heard its a life saver, i never tried it im on methadone for pain and for w/ds but mostly for chronic back pain, i was taking 80 mgs of perk a day until i checked myself into detox i was there for 5 days then they released me i' hated to go but i never will regret it though, i also go to NA which is a big help it really does work, if your serious about getting off hydro try going to a meeting and try the sub it really does work , just look at all the sucess stories on the forum about it. but only certain doc can prescribe it.good luck and let us know how your doing.

Lisa~ i know what you mean i was terrified the first meeting i went to but once i got there i felt so comtoable if you like coffee and like groups you;ll fit in just fine you dont have to say anything just listen they usually say is there anyone here for the first time or just coming back and all you have to do is raise your hand and introduce yourself then you;ll get a new comer keychain, its great but go when you think your ready.

Patmomma~ i know what you mean about the pills i think of taking a perk and i get violenlty nusea but 2 months ago i would of given anything just to get my hands on one lol, well you;ll be off them soon , hun continue to get better

take care


[:I]

Clean Date:10/16/06

Just For Today

Luv N Hugs,
Clarkie

[AmyBreeze]

quote:Originally posted by nymommy

Lisa & NY, doing OK. Back on track. Thank you so much for asking. I feel awful for getting off the track and feel defeated, but trying my best to move on and stay positive and look at the good. I am back on the sub and doing great.

I had an old refill of vikes and that demon addiction inside kept nagging at me to refill and I did. I took them and got very ill. Now I am back on the sub and doing great but feel awful and defeated for that one day. But I can't do anything about it. I have to move on.....I locked up the vikes and that's that. I want to keep them because they are good for coughs. My daughter gets this awful cold about 4 times a year and with it comes this cough that she has to go to the dr to get vikes to stop it, so I'll have them and save her the trip to the dr. But again they are LOCKED up and only hubby has the key.

The past is the past.....my future is bright, I can see the light at the end of the tunnell and I have to remember that!!!

Amy

[morticia]

AmyBreeze,
Im proud of you! dont be hard on yourself because you filled the script you got a little off track thats ok everyone slips once and a while i can unerstand how they made you sick , just the thought of taking any kind of pill except for my methadone makes me sick to my stomach. i just dont know how i was able to take 80 mgs of perks 4 weeks ago, it just floors me.
any way im glad hubby has the key so you cant get to them, hope you feel better soon.
take care

[:I]


Clean Date:10/16/06

Just For Today

Luv N Hugs,
Clarkie

[AmyBreeze]

quote:Originally posted by morticia

AmyBreeze,
Im proud of you! dont be hard on yourself because you filled the script you got a little off track thats ok everyone slips once and a while i can unerstand how they made you sick , just the thought of taking any kind of pill except for my methadone makes me sick to my stomach. i just dont know how i was able to take 80 mgs of perks 4 weeks ago, it just floors me.
any way im glad hubby has the key so you cant get to them, hope you feel better soon.
take care

[:I]


Clean Date:10/16/06

Just For Today

Luv N Hugs,
Clarkie

Thank you for encouragment Morticia. I really needed that. Even though I'm back on track, it's hard not to be pissed at yourself. But I can understand what you mean about not taking the same meds again. Lord, I can't imagine taking all those pills again. Makes my stomach turn just thinking of it!

Thank you again.[)]

[Osagewoman]

Hi, all! Glad to hear everyone is doing so well! I quit smoking (well, I smoke ONE cig per day, if that, sometimes 1/2), so I consider that quitting! As for my hydro use, I need some quick advise! I am up for a great job promotion, in fact, it's mine as long as I pass the drug test! Will my hydro show up? I didn't find this out until 5 hours ago. They haven't called yet. I took half of a Lortab 10 at 6am. Don't want to take anymore today until I find out...but is there anything I can drink/eat/take to help???? Thanks!!!

[tennlady9598]

A very sweet OSAGEWOMAN directed me to this discussion and i want to share with you and see what you think maybe i could do, thanks again, its is GREAT to have a friend out there!!!! Heres the story again, sorry osage, i knowyou already read it!!
I have been taking tramadol, for about 2 years and at my peak, taking up to 30 a day, im at about 15 a day now, this drug scares the hell out of me. I feel like without it, i am not a goo enough person, not as good a lover, mother cook friend, whatever, i will actually cancel events around whether i had enough pills. I have lied to doctors pharamcists family members you name it. I have stolen money from my husband and pawned things to get money for these little "wonders" I am so fully afraid of running out that i get overwhlemed and depressed and think maybe I should just end it all and not have to worry anymore. I have truly thought that before. I would not take mine until nighttime and then take about 20 spaced over 3-5 hours for the High the euphoria, that great feeling. I went to the Dr. today, a new younger one and explained almost exactly what was going on ( i said i was taking about 12 a day) I dont know why i couldnt go all the way telling him but i didnt. He was really nice and understood, of course he wrote me a scrip for 120(no refills() with instructions to taper down(no SPECIFIC) instructions, tho. and i am to gradually introduce neurontin into my system to build up to 300 mg a day of that. How should i taper with only 120 pills left. I am sooooo afraid and would love some advice. I dont really know if i can do this, i am sooooooo DEPENDENT on this drug it is truly terrifying. im not spelling too well today, but can someone help me out, i have lots of the neurontin, and i have about 60 xanax, can anyone give me a REAL plan to follow and help me out of this prison of a bottle? Love to all and prayers to those in my shape,

mortica, thank you for the reply! I have considered subx but i could never afford it and if I ever had insurance again i dont think i'd want them paying for it either, if it were available off the street maybe i'd try. but as of now i'm still on day one. i'm back at about 4 hours, this mornin was too harsh so I took one, and then another! d'ohhh!! so right about now is about 4 hours again, i guess 4 hours is when my guilt kicks in and i want to "quit" but then by about 12 - 18 hours is when the anxiety and jumpy achy horrible feelin kicks in and rules over the guilt "want to quit" feeling.

amybreeze, dont trip on the setback.....just forget it and move on in the RIGHT direction. i have pretty much been "trying" to quit since i was about 25....now i'm 28 and keep feeling guilty every day about slipping and so i take more just to not feel, and then feel guilty, then take more, a vicsious cycle! dont let it set you back. esp if you are taking subx? just be glad you can afford it and move on. even if every day you slip (like me) and have to start over! sounds like you have a conscience and want to get over this, so get'r'done! forget about the prescrip slip, its over its done. soon you'll be at 24 hours clean, and then 36, then 48......count every hour if you have to. thats what I do. unfortunately for me I only get to 18 or 20 and fail. but i'm still TRYING......

also, i'm considering a meeting tonight.

[AmyBreeze]

quote:Originally posted by my20sRgone



also, i'm considering a meeting tonight.

Please GO to the meetings. The NA meetings are GREAT!!! Cant's say enough about them, and thank you for the encouragement!

Will write more later.....time for bed. Been a long day and I just want to sleep and not think about it all.

Later my friends!!!!!

Amy [8)]

[kdkd81]

Hello, I have been taking percocet for about a year and half now for back pain. As with most I started taking more and more to get that feeling and take my pain away. For the past few weeks I was up to at least 15 10mg pills per day. I realized I had a problem and decided to quit on my own, but my dr also noticed this and brought it to my attention. I denied it to him because I was scared of the consiquences. It just so happend that I took my last 30 mgs at 8 pm yesterday with the intent to quite cold turkey. As the sympoms began, I decided that when I saw my dr today I would ask for a large amount to "hold me over for a while", but this was infact for me to attempt to taper off on my own. He shocked me with saying he thought I was addiced and prescribed me a very small amount that is to be only used when needed. I decided to not even fill this script and continue cold turkey. Its been 24 hours and 20 mins since I last took my percs. I have a sleep aid and purchased l tyrsoine b 6 and a mineral supplement as suggested in thomas's recipe. This really has not worked, except the sleeping pill. I am a very active person and can not stay home for 3 days and dope myself up as directed by the recipe. What can I do for the next few days to aliviate the horrible pain I am going through. I do not want to leave my room. I am sitting here fully clothed in a hooded sweatshirt with the hood up, sweating yet freezing. I lay in my bed with this outfit on under a down conforter and still freeze. My stomach is in knots. If I could aliviate these 2 symptoms, I would be ok. Please someone give me an answer, and sorry for the rambleing, just in alot of pain right now

[kdkd81]

I forgot to mention. I am set to have surgery sometime during december. Would I become hooked once again after surgery. I know I will need percs to aliviate the pain of the surgery, plus they will have me hooked up to an IV in the hospital post surgery. Should I just quit after the sugery?? I do not want to go throught his agony, just to be forced to go through it again in a month.

[tennlady9598]

One thing that i keep reading that may help you is have you considered asking your doc to prescribe you xanax to help wean oyou off the others? Or maybe valiums, they make you feel a ittle drowsy so if you like the up feeling of the other stuff its prob not as easy for you to get addicted to benzos. It may help you to taper down and to supplement the taper down with xanax till your down to nothing and then slowly taper off the xanax, ask your doc aboutit, he may surprise you and be really receptive to it and helpful. Im no doc, tho, just a suggestion

quote:Originally posted by kdkd81

Hello, I have been taking percocet for about a year and half now for back pain. As with most I started taking more and more to get that feeling and take my pain away. For the past few weeks I was up to at least 15 10mg pills per day. I realized I had a problem and decided to quit on my own, but my dr also noticed this and brought it to my attention. I denied it to him because I was scared of the consiquences. It just so happend that I took my last 30 mgs at 8 pm yesterday with the intent to quite cold turkey. As the sympoms began, I decided that when I saw my dr today I would ask for a large amount to "hold me over for a while", but this was infact for me to attempt to taper off on my own. He shocked me with saying he thought I was addiced and prescribed me a very small amount that is to be only used when needed. I decided to not even fill this script and continue cold turkey. Its been 24 hours and 20 mins since I last took my percs. I have a sleep aid and purchased l tyrsoine b 6 and a mineral supplement as suggested in thomas's recipe. This really has not worked, except the sleeping pill. I am a very active person and can not stay home for 3 days and dope myself up as directed by the recipe. What can I do for the next few days to aliviate the horrible pain I am going through. I do not want to leave my room. I am sitting here fully clothed in a hooded sweatshirt with the hood up, sweating yet freezing. I lay in my bed with this outfit on under a down conforter and still freeze. My stomach is in knots. If I could aliviate these 2 symptoms, I would be ok. Please someone give me an answer, and sorry for the rambleing, just in alot of pain right now

LOve and prayers to all who are in my shape!!!

[LISA GIRL]

Tenn lady. .Welcome.. Don't know anything about Tramadol unfortunately. Nor do I know anything about tapering..I am doing the suboxone thing. I know there was a formula for tapering posted a while back (by Kaidog I think) which gave the percentage to cut down by each week. I know exactly how it feels to not to want to do anything unless you have enough pills to get you thru. It's an awful feeling having your life tied to your pill supply. Hard to believe a doctor wrote you a script without giving you a plan to taper. You might want to try the suboxone if you can't successfully taper.. tapering doesn't work for everyone.. you have to be VERY disciplined. But good luck and we're here to help you!

MY20s.. Welcome to you too! Where are you currently getting your pills? You said you don't have insurance but unless you are getting your pills somewhere for free, the sub is probably a cheaper route.. especially in the long run. I am saving a boatload of money since I quit. If you have been trying to quit for 3 years, without success I would say the price of the sub should not be your main concern. Does anyone here pay out of pocket for the sub? My ins covers it so I don't know how much it costs but it cerainly is cheaper than buying pills off the street I would think??

Osage woman.. The lortab could show up if they test for it. Lots of time they are just testing for street drugs.. pot, cocaine etc but they may test for painkillers since they are an increasing problem these days..sorry I don't know if there is anything you could take to help it from showing up but you could probably google it.. (I google everything.. hahaha.. how I found this board!

Amy.. welcome back. Do you think maybe your sub dose is not high enough if you were having cravings for the vikes while on it? I had/have some cravings but not strong enough to get me to bite.. (I still have my pills too.. keep them for an emergency) OR if you feel like that bottle will continue to haunt them maybe it is better that you have a last hurrah and just do the rest and be done with it.. I think you said you wouldn't be able to get another script.? I tried to do that but had too many pills to take safely before the date I set for myself. But I did try... it was fun while it lasted. I do wish I could be one to safely take them recreationally periodically. But I doubt I am so at least for now, I will forge on. One day at a time right girl?

Everyone else...Mort, Pat Mamma and of course my MNF(HAHAHAHA) NYMOMMY, hope you are all having a craving free, wonderful evening.. Chat at you guys later!

[tennlady9598]

[THANK YOU lisa for the welcome, I have said repeatedly how nice this site it and to be able to tell the truth and be honest about my conditon as a junkie, cuz thats what I am i have to admit, and you guys are really nice and open and thanks!!!!!!!!! It is a blessing,

LOve and prayers to all who are in my shape!!!

[nymommy]

~~amy..the past is certainly the past..your back on the bike so start peddling....osage woman~~~ if you have a legimate prescription, you have nothing to worry about..in other words your under a doctors care...sorry i have no advice for the newbie who is tapering, i personally was never successful going that route...i also never tried very hard........good luck everyone..i think tomorrow i'm 5-6 weeks clean..help me out MNF..how long has it been for me??

[LISA GIRL]

KDKD....In my opinion, detoxing is something you only want to do once if you can help it...especially if you are going cold turkey. If you know for sure you will be taking pills after your surgery in just a few months I would most definitely wait til you are done with the surgery to quit. Absolutely. "That is my final answer."

NMMOMMY (MNF!) Not positive (can I use a lifeline?) but fairly sure you will be 6 weeks tomorrow.. I just passed 4 weeks and you were more than a week ahead of me. Remember when we were counting hours? ROCK ON!

[kdkd81]

Will I become hooked if I do have to take the pills after the surgery. Even if I am clean for a month prior to?

[LISA GIRL]

quote:Originally posted by kdkd81

Will I become hooked if I do have to take the pills after the surgery. Even if I am clean for a month prior to?

As I understand it, even though you were to stop for a while, you addiction will continue to progress and you will pick up right where you left off. I have read this many places.. How long do you think you would be on the pills after the surgery?

(************DAVE, CHRISH? *****isn't this correct?)

[LISA GIRL]

AMY... Just out of curiousity. How long did you wait after your last sub dose to take the vikes? Did you get sick? I think I heard that you won't feel the pain pills for something like 20 hours after your last sub dose. I only wonder in case I really needed to take something for pain sometime. I wonder what I would do if something should happen and I needed the pills and couldn't feel the effects b/c of the sub. ??

again... just asking for informational purposes only...although all this talk about the pills does make me crave slightly. I hate that! Guess I will go have a piece of pizza...don't need that either but better than a percocet for me.

[kdkd81]

If I have a choice, I am going to opt to not have any narcatic meds during or post surgery. If I am in agony and must, I would prefferable take the minimal amount for no longer then a week to help coupe with only the surgical pain and no other pre existing pain.

Let it be noted that I just took an amibene and all my withdrawal has been masked by the delirum the ambiene has brought upon me, maybe this is a sufficiant way to detox??