[want to be free]

I am new to this board, I'Ve checked it out numerous times in the last few months, I don't even know know if I'll be able to find my way back after I post this. I just want to share my story and everytime I'm on the internet this website is the one I always land on. I am a painkiller addict. I have always tried to dismiss it, thinking that I was in Chronic pain, or that it was no big deal because I didn't take alot. I finally realized it last week when I went to see 4 different doctors for a broken toe, and went through 5 prescriptions if percocet in 2 weeks. I have 3 young children, I am a stay at home mom, and I have hidden my problem from everyone. I'm probably jumping all around in this post, it's just the first time I've have spoken about it to anyone, and I feel like I have so much to say and can't get it into words. Yesterday I decided enough was enough, I ran out of percs, I took 7 Darvocet from my mom telling her I had back pain. I called a friend who is a doctor and asker her to prescribe something for neighbor who was trying to kick painkillers but couldn't put anything in her name so it needed to be in mine. She prescribed me Clonodine and Xanax XR. I took 4 Darvocets last night, I took 3 today...so now I guess I'm on my own I feel sick, I feel like a loser, and I just hope I can do this and still take care of my kids (husband is overseas on business for 4 weeks, besides he doesn't know anyway). I feel lonely. Time to go make dinner...that felt good...to get it all out. thank you

[mpvt]

Your not a loser I can tell you that.I was actively addicted for 23 years and was severely depressed that whole time.
Hang in there and try and do it the way your going now.If you find you can't do it then you should really try buprenorphene (Suboxone,Subutex).Go to www.suboxone.com and read up on this drug.The web site also has a doctor locator so if you decide you want to try it then get a list of prescribing doctors and start phoning for an appointment.You don't have to suffer anymore there is medicine out there and buprenorphene is one of the best.Good luck.....Dave

[want to be free]

Thank you for responding, but I don't know if I am there yet. I'm about to post again, so you can read that then tell me what you think

[withak]

hi again...i just saw this after responding to your other post about the perc story and south florida....

(sigh)...we need to talk....i'm in your position. no one knows except the people on this site, and about a month ago when i first got on here, believe me, did it feel good to spill the beans....you would never guess i have a pill problem by my outward appearance.

ok, i hope we can connect.
you can email me too
ksimmie@msn.com