me vs. cravings

[mwalt]

Well, I feel like Im in a boxing ring and its me as the underdog, with a big, bad, sneaky opponent called CRAVINGS in the opposite corner. I have managed to stay clean for about 4 months (a drop in the bucket), and am working up the nerve to go to a meeting, but until then, I am coming here for support, and taking my LDN to prevent relapse. Truth is, I miss being high in any way shape or form. I guess thats what cravings are in a nutshell.... I wonder, do the cravings subside over time? Alot of time? Im not miserable - Im not in imminent danger or relapsing, I just miss that warm fuzzy feeling but I am clearheaded enough to know that that warm fuzzy feeling is just too damn expensive and I am not wlling to pay the price. I wish I didnt have to put so much energy into thinking about it. I am super duper busy, 2 kids, own a business, workout, great husband etc... I AM going to get involved in meetings in some way, but I have to be ready... for you long time success stories, did the cravings EVER go away? is it purely biological or is it mainly psychological? I found that taking LDPA has helped with mood and motivation somewhat, but again, I just miss the high. any words of support would be greatly appreciated!

[yezdegerd]

What's your relapse count? I think mines 11 and every friggin time I thought what the hell did I do that for! And like the dumb dumb I am I just kept on popping them. Maybe I enjoy wd haha! You're not missing anything, even after 4 months it still won't feel like that first time.

[staysober10]

mwalt,

The cravings definitly do go away with time. You shouldnt be craving them that bad after 4 months. You will think abou them here and there but it shouldnt be a point where you wake up and go to bed thinking about them. I was addicted to perks and viks. Moved out of state for work and had no connections for painkillers. I was craving them so bad! I woke up and thought about them, throughout the day I thought about them and before bed I thought about them. I was going to even order some online but was too scared. I prayed to god everynight if I can just wake up and not think about them. After a month or two they started to go away. I still thought about them, but quickly forgot about them. Congrats on going 4 months without using, that is such a great accomplishment. I am telling you, your going to feel bad if you relapse and use again. Its not worth it. That warm, fuzzy feeling will last maybe 20 or 30 minutes? Its not worth it. I was addicted for almost 2 years. After I moved out of state I was sober for 4 years. I recently moved back to the place I grew up and have been using for the past 4 months. I am now almost 58hours clean. I want to use but its not worth it anymore. I am a few years away from being 30, I need to grow up and live life drug free. I dont want to look back on my life and think that I wasted years addicted to a stupid pill. Please STAYSOBER. You are doing great! Keep posting too!

[ARTIST658]

Well, I feel like Im in a boxing ring and its me as the underdog, with a big, bad, sneaky opponent called CRAVINGS in the opposite corner. I have managed to stay clean for about 4 months (a drop in the bucket), and am working up the nerve to go to a meeting, but until then, I am coming here for support, and taking my LDN to prevent relapse. Truth is, I miss being high in any way shape or form. I guess thats what cravings are in a nutshell.... I wonder, do the cravings subside over time? Alot of time? Im not miserable - Im not in imminent danger or relapsing, I just miss that warm fuzzy feeling but I am clearheaded enough to know that that warm fuzzy feeling is just too damn expensive and I am not wlling to pay the price. I wish I didnt have to put so much energy into thinking about it. I am super duper busy, 2 kids, own a business, workout, great husband etc... I AM going to get involved in meetings in some way, but I have to be ready... for you long time success stories, did the cravings EVER go away? is it purely biological or is it mainly psychological? I found that taking LDPA has helped with mood and motivation somewhat, but again, I just miss the high. any words of support would be greatly appreciated!

You already know what you need to do - you said it in your post! Stop procrastinating getting to meetings! I don't know what you mean, saying you "have to be ready." If you are having cravings, you are ready. If you WANT to stay clean, you are ready. The best defense against cravings, in my opinion, is meetings.

YES, the cravings do go away, if you are working a solid recovery program to overcome all aspects of the disease - not just the physical detox. NA (or AA) are there to help through the mental and emotional aspects of addiction. Getting clean is not the hard part, in my opinion; staying clean is.

I can share one trick I did, early on, that helped me when I had cravings. I trained my mind, when cravings came along. Every time I started to romantize the idea of a drug, I immediately made myself picture the worst possible moment of my active use. It took effort at first, but then it became automatic. Our addictive minds are awfully good at minimizing the memory of how 'bad' it got - and maximizing how 'good' it was. Sometimes, it seems, the further away we are from that last nightmare of our addiction, the closer we are to picking up again. We have to keep that memory of the h*ll of active addiction fresh, lest we forget and return to it.

Regardless, meetings are the answer - not later, but now.

God bless,
Ruth

[mwalt]

Thank you for the responses. Great tip on remembering the bad first! I am going to go to a meeting today - just have to look up the schedule in my area. My cravings are not constant, and they are not unbearable - after 4 months, they HAVE subsided. i have just been thinking about pills alot lately. Right this second my little boys are being so cute and precious and I wouldnt take a pill for anything! Last week, I had 2 sick kids, my phone was broke, had nonstop requests from everyone and just wanted some chemical relief! Didnt do anything though... that is where the LDN has helped I think as I know it would do no good to relapse. have used on and off for years, got clean before both pregnancies, but after the c-sections, relapsed with percs, and was on sub for 10 months and then went on LDN and have been straight since.... I still just sometimes really miss the feeling, thats all. Ill post after I go to the meeting!