To drop on all of you all at once, especailly since I am new here, lurking mostly, and none of you know much about me but - everything came to a head tonight while I was at work, and I couldn't live with my problem anymore, and I told my boss that I had a problem with prescription pain medicine, and that I needed help. He is a very nice person, and was very supportive, telling me I did the right thing, and that I would'nt be fired for coming forward, and I would recieve help. He drove me home, and told me that we would talk more tommorow (there are bosses above him that need to be notified). I didn't mess up at work or anything, I have just been fighting with dependency and withdrawls off and on for almost a year now, and I just simply could not fight any longer.
To give a short history on my problem, I have a bulging disc in my neck, and they have been prescribing me first
lortabs, and then moved up to
percocets, for about two years steadily, I'm not faulting the doctors either, they were just trying to help. They also tried other things like physical therapy, and steroid injections, but none seemed to help. I also take
ambien for sleep,wich has also changed over time from being a blessing, to a never ending taking too much and running out early game.
That has pretty much been the nature of my problem this whole time, I take too much (sometimes way too much) run out early, and feel like dying, and running to the doctor for more, which of course puts them on the defensive, and rightly so. Well this last month sealed my fate, I had a brand new script for sixty percocet 10mg, and thirty ambien 10mgs. I was off work on vacation, and all of this medicince was supposed to last a month, and all was gone within the span of two weeks, despite the fact that I let my wife dispense them to me as, they would have only lasted a week under my care, God bless her she tries, but I can be such a monster,and awsome liar,and deal-maker, when I want my meds. Also this problem has been just as much of a killer on my family life, as well as work. Anyway last weekend I got my hands on nine of my percocets, and took all nine in a twenty four hour period, don't ask me what else I did cause I don't remember. The next day I took six ambiens at once, I don't recall much but I did not intend to take that many, but apparently after I got a little loopy, I helped myself to the rest(that part is enough to scare even me!) , I then remember vague hallucinations, and wandering around the house and driveway, thank god I didn't get hurt or hurt someone else! By the way, I had accidentally found where my wife had hidden them, she would have never given me that much at once.
Anyway, just waiting to see what happens,never been in this situation before, been working at this job for 12 years now, I'm not really afraid of losing my job, just worried about what my options will be, I have talked to a nearby doctor who does the subutex outpatiant program, and would prefer that If they will let me.
Input appreciated, I will try to keep you posted, unless I wind up in a basement somewhere with a straight jacket on.
Huge Bomb !! 
The first step to recovery is admitting that you need help{and asking for it]!!Good for you!!!Let your job help you with your problem and some companies will pick up the tab.Hopefully they will[I hope so}.Good luck and please keeps us informed.
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