[tryinhard]

HI:
I am new to this board and am really having a hard time realizing that I am an addict. Here is my position; I just turned 26 this wed, about 200 lbs at 6 feet. I am actually in shape as i was extremely into bodybuilding since like 14. I eat right and workout. However, i have been doing pills for the past three years ( oxycontin and methadone). currently i have only been taking methadone at 30mg for the past month - maybe even doing it only eod. I want to get clean so bad its killing me. I have not takin methadone for 3 days and am going through some major depression and withdrawls. A friend of mine gave me some subutex , i took 1 8mg tab 2 days ago- and it made me sick as hell, i mean really sick. I need some advice- i have finals this week and am trying to do this at the same time as studying. for some reason adderall helps a bit with the withdrawls but makes me verry jittery. i need to get clean..........can anyone help me out?

[Robert_325]

Originally Posted by tryinhard

HI:
I am new to this board and am really having a hard time realizing that I am an addict.......................... i have been doing pills for the past three years ( oxycontin and methadone)..................I have not takin methadone for 3 days and am going through some major depression and withdrawls. A friend of mine gave me some subutex , i took 1 8mg tab 2 days ago- and it made me sick as hell, i mean really sick. I need some advice- i have finals this week and am trying to do this at the same time as studying. for some reason adderall helps a bit with the withdrawls but makes me verry jittery. i need to get clean..........can anyone help me out?

Tryin,

You are in bad W/Ds just as you said, W/Ds and depression. You are addicted. You've taken OC and methadone for 3 years!!! What is hard to realize about that? No need to be ashamed, just realize where you are and make a gameplan. Lots of us have been in the same place. I promise you can get out of it though. But you have to accept where you are ... you're an addict. You wouldn't be posting all this if you didn't have a problem.

Athletes can become addicts too. I played competitive racquetball for over 25 years, ran 6 miles a day for years, worked out on weights, but I still became addicted ... mostly from sports injuries. Athletes aren't exempt. Lots of athletes become addicts.

You said you took Subutex 2 days ago, have not taken any drugs in 3 days. Here is the deal. You have to be in acute w/d before you take any Subutex or it puts you into MORE serious w/ds. That is exactly what happened to you. You were only off opiates for one day. That is not long enough. That is why you go to a dr for this stuff. The Adderall is just wiring you. That is not the answer. That is why you are so jittery.

If you are actually doing finals as we speak, I would probably get through my finals and then do this. That is me. You don't need the stress with finals for what my opinion is worth. A few more days won't matter ... just only take meds medicinally. Don't get high. If Adderall is wiring you, you are taking more than you need taking it medicinally. Again, just get through finals and then stop all this.

Next go to www.subutex.com. You can enter your zip code there and they will give you the drs in your area who prescribe Subutex if you don't know who to go to. They even give you a list of pharmacies. But use a dr ... don't just take it on your own. It worked great for me. 8mg is what I took too and I was taking 40 Lorcets a day. 8mg is a good dose. The dr will help you determine how long to take the medication. I just took it to get past W/Ds and then I stopped. Was only on it for a total of one month. I had no problems when I stopped. BTW ... think before you take the Subutex or Suboxone for an extended period of time. It becomes hard to stop too. No problems if you just use it to detox, but hard to stop if you take it a long time. You will have W/Ds from it too if you do it over a month.

Get through your finals, then contact a dr who knows this medication. They can help you. Good luck.

[tryinhard]

Rob,
thanks so much for the reply.... you are right for sure about admitting to myself that i am an addict. it feels good to be able to even say that on here. I dont think i want to get on the subutex, i just cant rationalize it to myself. sometimes i wonder why i should even try to get sober- this has been my dilema for sometime, but the older i get the more happiness i find in the simplest things in life. i have always been a strong person mentally and really thought that this was all mental, and up to a point i still think it may be. just talking about this really helps. how much longer do you think these w/ds will last.....my finals are next week on monday and tuesday- am i fooling myself by thinking that i will be ok in 3 more days? i want this so bad and i dont think i can bring myself to take anymore methadone. I have been smoking a lota mary and listening to music all day. Music is an amazing med for me and i think i can do this alone if i keep going to the gym and smoking- but i may also be in for far worse days than this. i appreciate anyone that can give advice to me. and to those of you whom have beaten an addicition---- MUCH RESPECT. for this is the hardest thing i have ever gone through- including the insane leg wrkouts i would put myself through. I also thought that since i am still athletic that may wd/s my not last as long-- true or no? also, has any one ever heard of taking testosterone or hgh to get through the WD's?

[Robert_325]

Originally Posted by tryinhard

Rob,
thanks so much for the reply.... you are right for sure about admitting to myself that i am an addict. it feels good to be able to even say that on here. I dont think i want to get on the subutex, i just cant rationalize it to myself. sometimes i wonder why i should even try to get sober- this has been my dilema for sometime, but the older i get the more happiness i find in the simplest things in life. i have always been a strong person mentally and really thought that this was all mental, and up to a point i still think it may be. just talking about this really helps. how much longer do you think these w/ds will last.....my finals are next week on monday and tuesday- am i fooling myself by thinking that i will be ok in 3 more days? i want this so bad and i dont think i can bring myself to take anymore methadone. I have been smoking a lota mary and listening to music all day. Music is an amazing med for me and i think i can do this alone if i keep going to the gym and smoking- but i may also be in for far worse days than this. i appreciate anyone that can give advice to me. and to those of you whom have beaten an addicition---- MUCH RESPECT. for this is the hardest thing i have ever gone through- including the insane leg wrkouts i would put myself through. I also thought that since i am still athletic that may wd/s my not last as long-- true or no? also, has any one ever heard of taking testosterone or hgh to get through the WD's?

I honestly think that believing you will be over the W/Ds in a few days is kind of optimistic. You might be the exception, but I really think it will take longer. If you think you can handle it, then I would not take Subutex or anything else though. You know how you feel. I would not question your opinion if you think you are ok.

I know for a fact that if you spend some major time hitting the weights and such, it will help you. Most people could not handle that, but you are used to it. Most people just try to walk during detox and that helps. I have worked out during a detox when I was younger and it helped me. Just don't over do it trying to over compensate. Your body is going through hell even if you are athlete.

No way I would do HGH, or any type of steroid. Nothing even related. Your body is being put to the test anyway. Don't do that to it.

Admitting you're an addict does help. This forum is for talking and sharing what you are going through. People here will help you. Just be honest with yourself and do what you know is really the right thing. I abused every drug there is from 1968 till recently. I stopped a few times for very short periods. I have never really been clean. I had 3 years clean from 2002-2005 but relapsed.

I recently turned my life over to Christ. That has been the biggest change ever in my life. As long as I maintain this relationship I know I will not use. Not trying to preach, but I am at peace now. I have no need for any drugs. When all else failed, this has been successful. All things are possible through Christ. God removed all of my obsessions for drugs from me completely. Good luck and God bless!!!

[tryinhard]

Ok, I am a bit confused.........
SO in response to my first post regarding methadone. ........... its been like 6-7 days total since i stopped methadone totally. i did take 30 mg of OC 2 days ago, because i was going thru WD's........like i had said. but today i actually feel fine- and i am kinda wondering why? i smoke alot of pot, and it helps, and i have still been able to go to the gym and do cardio then sit in the suana........... you wouldnt beleive how much sweat comes out. i thought i was sick so i felt sick, but in reality I dont even think i needed to take that dose of OC 2 days ago. am i foolish to think i am done with this?

[Robert_325]

Originally Posted by tryinhard

Ok, I am a bit confused.........
SO in response to my first post regarding methadone. ........... its been like 6-7 days total since i stopped methadone totally. i did take 30 mg of OC 2 days ago, because i was going thru WD's........like i had said. but today i actually feel fine- and i am kinda wondering why? i smoke alot of pot, and it helps, and i have still been able to go to the gym and do cardio then sit in the suana........... you wouldnt beleive how much sweat comes out. i thought i was sick so i felt sick, but in reality I dont even think i needed to take that dose of OC 2 days ago. am i foolish to think i am done with this?

Different people have different experiences in W/D to an extent. I am kind of surprised that you are having a pretty easy time it seems after only a week. But I guess it happens sometimes. It's almost bad to have an easy time in detox because it can make a person think," hey, this isn't that bad. I can handle this easy." Then they aren't as scared to go back out again. But I would caution that as I doubt you would have such an easy time the next time. If this is it for you, and you are not going to have to suffer like so many others do, just consider yourself lucky and blessed. Stick to your guns and don't go back. I don't think the OC helped you a couple days ago. I think you are just plain lucky that your W/Ds did not affect you anymore adversely than they have. I am sure the exercise and suana helped you too. Good luck.

[tryinhard]

Rob,
thanks for your quick reply, i do still feel anxious and kinda gittery, i had to take 1mg a xanax to sleep last night. but honestly other than that i do feel ok. i really think that hitting the gym during the course of my addiction helped me get the drugs out of my body fast. dont get me wrong i would LOVE TO GET high on opiates right now, so i still do crave it- i am not saying i am totally wd free, but i am very surprised at how mild my symptoms are. i am not at all trying to state that this was an easy 6 days i know i suffered for a few days bad, but i swear once i thought about it i got so pissed off that i totally threw the idea (of taking pain meds)out of my mind. I really think that if you are using now you can benefit by going to the gym while you are in fact- on drugs. keep it up even if it burns because it is an amazing rush to feel like you can do that. but maybe i am wrong. i need to focus on never doing these drugs again- thats hard. but i have the feeling i can replace that high with other things. i like having a strong body- i keeps me at par with my head.