[tirzahjoy]

there have been many signs that my boyfriend has some type of drug problem, probably painkillers. He makes decent money but were always in a hole financially. when ive tried to confront him he always has an excuse and will look me in the eyes and everything but my gut instinct keeps telling me something is wrong. i knew when we had started dating that he had problems with heroin and oxycontin in the past. he told me he had been clean for 2 years. i belived him. last march, however, i found a spoon that looked liked mine in the glove compartment of his car with some chalky residue on it. as soon as he saw i had it, he threw it out the window of the moving car. first he told me he had no idea what it was but as i continued questioning, weeks later he told me it was from a friend of his. around that same time, his bank account was constantly overdrawn, he was missing a lot of work, constantly vomiting, borrowing money from me, his family, and selling movies and video games and that type of thing. he has very small, faint marks on his arms and i dont know much about this but am assuming that if he were currently shooting, they would be more noticable, but im not sure. he has a managment position for a company that he likes now and is no longer missing work. he functions professionally and never seems high but still needs to borrow money quite frequently which is why i think it could be pills. also he isnt vomiting as often as he was a couple of months ago. we will be having a baby in january and im terrified that he's lying to me and that things will get worse and this will destroy us. i dont know how to get him to tell me the truth. a couple people i have gone to think i should just leave him but its not that simple when you love somebody. i just want to help him but i have no money, he has no insurance and i just dont know where to turn. im scared and i feel really alone right now.

[gya321]

Im sorry to hear your situation. It sounds like your correct about his problems. Im recovering as well. Dont feel alone on this one there are plenty of people in the same situation. Its difficult because without him wanting to quit there isnt much you can do, sorry to say but its true. Show him the good things in life like you, your upcoming child, etc. Good luck, let me know if you need more information

[mpvt]

You just describe the life of an addict.You can confront him about it but until he's ready there is little you can do.......Dave

[DMS321]

I agree with gya and Dave, without wanting to quit, he more than likely will not.... I am the daughter of a cocaine addict and nothing was more important than the cocaine.... If I were you I would definitely confront him and just let him know that you two have a definite future together (now with the baby coming) and if he is doing the things that you think he is doing, he is going to have to clean up his act if he wants his future with you.... I understand that you love him but once that baby comes you are going to have a love so strong for that child that you will not want that little one anywhere near that habit... from experience trust me having a parent as an addict isn't fun... My husband was also an addict before we were together and during my pregnancy someone put his "drug of choice" right in his face (I was there and I wasn't going to make up his mind for him) and because he knew how much I was against it and his knew that he was not going to throw his future away and take a chance on never seeing his child... he didn't do it.. Sorry for babbling but if he cannot kick the habit by the time your child is born I agree with whoever is telling you to leave him

D