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having hard time']
  1. #1
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    Default having hard time']

    i am just pill popping to dinking i just dont know how to stop
    help me. i have just been diagnosed with cancer

  2. #2
    disabledleo is offline Member
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    Default Ok can you share a little more info??

    If you dont mind sharing a little more info so we can figure out how to respond

  3. #3
    Anonymous Guest

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    Hi Shy
    I'm so sorry to hear about the cancer...what kind is it and so on...
    are you drinking or taking pills, shy, were we doing a taper off subs I'm sorry I don't remember...
    well get you thru this...
    let us know..
    talk to you soon,Melinda

  4. #4
    Robert_325 is offline Retired
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    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    i am just pill popping to dinking i just dont know how to stop
    help me. i have just been diagnosed with cancer





    shybaybe ....... you are always supportive of others and I just wanted you to know that I will be lifting you up today in prayer to the Mightiest God, our Heavenly Father who is the Master Physician. All things are possible through Christ! We need to always maintain our faith. Melinda and I will say a special prayer of intercession on your behalf this morning in church.

    Jesus always sits at God's right hand and is interceeding for you this very moment. Through Him glory will be brought to God and recovery to you according to all the riches and glory of the Father. Trust in Him for there is where the healing comes from. They are yours for the asking, maintain your faith in His gracious will. I wish you the very best and pray for a complete healing in your body at this time. God bless.
    Last edited by Robert_325; 03-20-2011 at 07:07 AM.
    I am not a dr. My statements are based on years of experience and related education. Consult with the professional of your choice regarding matters of concern.

  5. #5
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    Thumbs up

    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    i am just pill popping to dinking i just dont know how to stop
    help me. i have just been diagnosed with cancer
    I'm new here, 2nd reply.

    You need to contact a detox unit where you live and have them recommend a doctor learned in such matters. They (detox centre) can help also.

    So can your local Narcotics Anonymous meeting. Just beware that N.A. is uncontrolled and not monitored and that you are dealing with a group of addicts at all stages of recovery. Some will try and use you to death. Others would give their right arm to help. Keep that in mind. N.A. works by stripping you of your denial of having out-of-control addictions and drug use. Then they steer you toward help, such as "treatment", which gives you tools to cope with life. They also offer camaraderie and friendship and endless help.

    Best of luck to you in overcoming your addictions and finding your drug-free life once again (remember when you were younger and life was just so cool?).

  6. #6
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    Default

    thanks for all the replies and support. i was getting really bad, mixing ativan with opiates, soma and alcohol. had several blackouts and just was a complete zombie. Ended up in ER a couple times becasue although i was conscious i was unresponsive. i had my last drink saturday, my last ativan sunday (yesterday). havent had any opiates in about 2 weeks or soma. i was prescribed tyl 3 for the pain i had surgery this morning. its a very small amount. They did give me morphine after surgery. i am gonna try to makie do with IBU. i plan on checking out a meeting sometime this week, after ive recuperated some from mjy surgery. i dont know why iy is so hard for me to get my addicition under conrol. I have been on this message borad for over 2 years now. I see other people succeeding, or alteast getting a nice chunk of clean time befor they relapse. using opiates was bad enough, but when i started adding 20 -30 ativans a day plus 20 somas a day, plus alcohol, that knocked me to my knees. i have come to realize anything mind altering i cannot touch. soma, lomotil, opiates, alcohol, benzos. i have no control. i b elieve i will get to where i need to be eventually. considering all i was taking, i didnt have much withdrawls. prob cuz i d use for 3-5 days, run out, have some withdrawls, then use again in a week or two.
    my last episode i was so out5 of it, my parents had to cnahge me because i urinated on my self. I have no memory of it. Another incidnet happened a couplke weeks ago. I took like 10 ativans then went to the bar. All i remeber is having 4 drinks. After that i blaked out. but i was told wehn i was waloking back home with my aunt, i8 fell to the ground and could not get up. She had to go back to her house to get help. It is so scary cuz i never had any of that stuff happen to me until the last couple months when i started mixing benzos and somas and alcohol with everything. i have an appointmet to see A shrink in may. i will have to tell him about my addicition. At first i was just gonna see him, to get more ativan, since it is very easy to get here if you see a psych doc for anxiety, although they usually do klonopin first. i also noticed after i started abusing the ativan, i started craving alcohol, and started drinking again, which for the most part i had been able to keep my alcoholism under control for the past couple years, with maybe 3 slips that didnt amount to much. But not these klast few times. Just pray for me and thank you robert for your above response. Even though i seem hopeless i know im not.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    thanks for all the replies and support. i was getting really bad, mixing ativan with opiates, soma and alcohol. had several blackouts and just was a complete zombie. Ended up in ER a couple times becasue although i was conscious i was unresponsive. i had my last drink saturday, my last ativan sunday (yesterday). havent had any opiates in about 2 weeks or soma. i was prescribed tyl 3 for the pain i had surgery this morning. its a very small amount. They did give me morphine after surgery. i am gonna try to makie do with IBU. i plan on checking out a meeting sometime this week, after ive recuperated some from mjy surgery. i dont know why iy is so hard for me to get my addicition under conrol. I have been on this message borad for over 2 years now. I see other people succeeding, or alteast getting a nice chunk of clean time befor they relapse. using opiates was bad enough, but when i started adding 20 -30 ativans a day plus 20 somas a day, plus alcohol, that knocked me to my knees. i have come to realize anything mind altering i cannot touch. soma, lomotil, opiates, alcohol, benzos. i have no control. i b elieve i will get to where i need to be eventually. considering all i was taking, i didnt have much withdrawls. prob cuz i d use for 3-5 days, run out, have some withdrawls, then use again in a week or two.
    my last episode i was so out5 of it, my parents had to cnahge me because i urinated on my self. I have no memory of it. Another incidnet happened a couplke weeks ago. I took like 10 ativans then went to the bar. All i remeber is having 4 drinks. After that i blaked out. but i was told wehn i was waloking back home with my aunt, i8 fell to the ground and could not get up. She had to go back to her house to get help. It is so scary cuz i never had any of that stuff happen to me until the last couple months when i started mixing benzos and somas and alcohol with everything. i have an appointmet to see A shrink in may. i will have to tell him about my addicition. At first i was just gonna see him, to get more ativan, since it is very easy to get here if you see a psych doc for anxiety, although they usually do klonopin first. i also noticed after i started abusing the ativan, i started craving alcohol, and started drinking again, which for the most part i had been able to keep my alcoholism under control for the past couple years, with maybe 3 slips that didnt amount to much. But not these klast few times. Just pray for me and thank you robert for your above response. Even though i seem hopeless i know im not.
    I was involved with N.A. for almost five years before I walked away. It only took two years before i started using lightly again. Now it is getting out of control and i know what I have to do: once again ask for help and take a Do Or Die attitude.

    One thing I have discovered in recovery is that addicts like ourselves tend to be vary sensitive people, whether we admit it or not. We also tend to be intenesely spiritual people who are completely and totally lost without any Higher Power to anwser to or ask for help. Freud himself understoood this when he studied drug addicts. He concluded the same thing about addicts being lost spiritual beings. this was 1929! Part of his work eventually found it's way into the original Alcoholics Anonymous.

    When I was told that I should completely turn my life over to my Higher Power I laughed and thought: "Yeah, right! I'm going to turn over My life to God (or whoever)???!!! When Hell freezes over." Well, Hell froze over. I had a spiritual awakening (since lost, not for me to find again) that people find hard to believe (it was very mystical). Now lost, I have to once again travel the road back to my Creator and my destiny, and letting drugs run and destroy my life and that of everyone around me is NOT my destiny. Nor is it yours or any other addicts.

    I became friends online with a recovered alcoholic who had 25 years of sobriety behind him. When I asked him WHY I had to endure such garbage and pain and misery from the hands of my Higher Power and made to suffer so much. I asked him also why I was being tested so heavily. He answered me this: "CCC, you are not being tested. You are being prepared." I broke down and sobbed for a half hour when he said that. Afterwards I felt calm, and as I was clean and sober at the time I kind of felt fantastic, like I weighed about 2 ounces and could almost float. Life will always present problems and difficulties and even waking nightmares. That is the way it is. We all have to learn how to cope with and understand these disasters so we can go on living and find peace and serenity.

    Quick tip: when you walk by a mirror and look at your reflection, do you smile and feel good or do you snear and frown at what you see? You need as much help and recovery as the magnitude of your frown and sneer of your own reflection.

  8. #8
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    i have a problem with the GOD or spirital stuff. I truly wholeheartedly want to believe. ive prayed, asked for help, read the bible. I just cant seem to feel it. I would love too though. i envy people who are really spiritual and or belive in god. I really want to. it just doesnt seem to happen for me and it sucks

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    i have a problem with the GOD or spirital stuff. I truly wholeheartedly want to believe. ive prayed, asked for help, read the bible. I just cant seem to feel it. I would love too though. i envy people who are really spiritual and or belive in god. I really want to. it just doesnt seem to happen for me and it sucks
    Then you're looking in the wrong places.

    You may have to expand the scope of your search. What if you are a Pagan or a Wiccan? Or maybe a New Ager? Perhaps a Rosicrucian? Or a Native Path follower? If you are looking for a phone number only on one page in a telephone book with 100 pages that you prolly will not find the number you are looking for.

    He, She, It is there. How do you think you got this far? Remember all those times you should have died from this or that or should have been hurt from that or this but weren't? Who or what do you think was intervening?

    Try pray or meditation and ask for contact and direction. Quiet your mind and listen. You should get some kind of answer.

    Or, just follow your "gut feelings". Have they ever let you down before? Have they ever turned out to be wrong?

    Always remember: you may not believe in your Higher Power, but He, She or It believes in you. They always have. They still do. That's why you're still here.

    Also, with so many having found their paths and Higher Powers, why would you be denied the same chance? You something special?
    Last edited by crystalclearconfusion; 03-21-2011 at 07:13 PM.

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