so very much for the support you gave me,you're all very wonderful caring people
Message:
I was reading the posts and ran across misaddicteds and a few others,but let me tell you,youve never known freedom till you kick the habit completely,beleive me honey if i came back to life i know anyone can,and im not demeaning anyones feelings or pain,pain is pain and everyones is unique and april 2oo5 was my first posting on this site and if yall read those youll know i was right where you are,i had just lost my husband of 25 yrs ,i married him at age 15,he was 18 and it was our daughters boyfriend who murdered him & ( he spent 6 Months-yes 6 mo)in the co.jail .my husband was only 43 and i was 40,and because we were kinda young,we thought we didnt need insurance and passed that option up 1 mo. before he passed,so the day he passed away i found myself with 113.00 to my entire name,couldnt pay rent so the last place we were together i had to leave and our grandson, Dakota 3 at the time didnt understand completely,he was papas joy and papa was his believe me and Dakota asked for him constantly though my daughter and Dakota was there when it actually happened,and my husband had fallen off a roof him and I had
been tarring a month before and broke his hip and his arm twice,so he murdered my husband by sneaking up behind him,my husband never knew what hit him and he died of head trauma by trying to save our daughter and Dakota from the abuse that monster inflicted on them,so to ease the hurt( i thought) i stayed high on
marijuana and hydros,i never slept,didnt eat,i weighed 87 lbs on 4-28-05 and i was so miserable, i had no home,me, my daughter and Dakota stayed with my husbands family and about 2 months later we both got our apartments,actually in the projects as people call it but i call it home because I wouldnt have one if were
not for them,and thats how I became addicted,my husband passed away on Oct.12-03 and I gave up the drugs and im not gonna lie,it almost killed me I think,not to mention I have had a pacemaker since I was 14 so it was dumb of me to do that in the 1st place.I had to be strong for Dakota so as of 4-28-05 I am as sober as a judge,and dealing with his death for the 1st time without being doped up was really hard but I was determined and my grandson deserved a better mama and OMG honestly.......I feel better than I have in yearssssssss and I am so thankful and even proud for myself for the 1st time,I never thought id make it 2 weeks but have for over 2 years and you couldnt give me a million dollars to take a pill or smoke weed,I thought life was boring w/o drugs,its not..........its actually boring to take them,they control every thing in your life, I know its hard but so is chasing dr.'s,finding people to buy the dope from, spending all your money on them, cant have a good moment w/o it,that stays the same only more expensive and you just need more but if you stop,youll feel bad for a week or so and bam,youll wonder where your head was for so long,take care guys and I wish every single one of you the very best and im telling you,you cannnnnnnnnn do it!!!!!!!!!!!!Hugs
Free at last from 10-20 hydro 10's a day and i feel better than ever,thank you guys 
I meant Krissy, Sorry i didnt have my glasses on......LoL 
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