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is any one here still using?
  1. #1
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    Default is any one here still using?

    i just wonder if any one here is still using (other than subs or mmt) but still wanting to get clean but not doing a very good job at it? I just feel like i am am the only one here who is a failure. hell, i ve never taken anything harder than vics. I dont have any experience with oxys or percs or whatever, except morphine or similar narcotics thru emergency rooms. all i have in my possession is 190 lomotil and 6 soma, which the soma i dont know if i should throw out or take like a tablet a day or what.
    .

  2. #2
    yezdegerd is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    i just wonder if any one here is still using (other than subs or mmt) but still wanting to get clean but not doing a very good job at it? I just feel like i am am the only one here who is a failure. hell, i ve never taken anything harder than vics. I dont have any experience with oxys or percs or whatever, except morphine or similar narcotics thru emergency rooms. all i have in my possession is 190 lomotil and 6 soma, which the soma i dont know if i should throw out or take like a tablet a day or what.
    .
    have you ever considered subs or MMT? I remember you struggling around the same time I was and the only thing that got me through was MMT. Even suboxone wasn't enough, I felt like ???? all the time and constant cravings, it works wonders for many other people though

  3. #3
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    i was on subs a couple summers ago, but i ended up taking to much of that too. it got me high. and i am afraid to go to a more addictive drug like methadone. its just so hard for me mentally.

  4. #4
    yezdegerd is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by shybaybe2003 View Post
    i was on subs a couple summers ago, but i ended up taking to much of that too. it got me high. and i am afraid to go to a more addictive drug like methadone. its just so hard for me mentally.
    Oh yeah I remember a thread of you asking if anyone else abused subs like you did because it actually got you high. It only gave me a buzz the first couple days. Methadone was the same but it took about 3 weeks before I stopped getting high and it's finally balanced out to where I don't even notice it anymore. It does take self control though to not raise your dose constantly. I hope you can pull through, I'll pray for you. I know that feeling of feeling hopeless, I don't think there is a worse feeling. I have faith in you though, I know you're ready, sometimes it just takes many many attempts

  5. #5
    shybaybe2003 is offline Senior Member
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    well, the only thing im on on now is lomotil. ill try to rationa nd wean myself off that and maybe by nexty week ill be clean. Thanks for the support.

  6. #6
    Philosophist is offline Junior Member
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    You can beat this when you decide you will......
    All you lack is fortitude to do something hard. Humans are funny like that, but know that they warm glow of light at the end of the tunnel called Physical Opiate dependency is worth the days in the cold you fought to get there.

    Your dose seems to be relatively low, if you want to be sober i know you will be able to. Its all up to you.

    Good luck^^

  7. #7
    Ggeo is offline Member
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    Default Hi..

    I'm still "using"...although I'm at a very low dosage as I'm using a tapering method. I think it's working pretty well so far but that is because I am determined to quit. I have NO want to get high anymore. I have a huge bottle of Oxycodone, my DOC, and being a recovering cancer patient, can get as much as want whenever I want completely FREE. I am down to only 20.665 mgs a day in the morning. In the thick of chemo which began one year ago this month I was gobbling three or four 30mg Oxycontins, plus tons of 7.5mg Oxycodones daily. I don't even know how much I was using. And, mind you, it wasn't for pain, it was to get high to escape the reality of my situation. I was in no pain! I mean to say, chemo was AWFUL yes, but it didn't really give me the kind of pain you need narcotics for. I just WANTED to be HIGH. Anyway I REALLY want to stop. All of it. Do you? Are you truly ready? If you are I would listen to Robert_325. He will tell you everything you need to know to get clean. And all the good people on here will help you through it...Good luck!
    GiGiLee58 likes this.

  8. #8
    RZO
    RZO is offline New Member
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    Default

    I've been struggling to get clean as well..

    In my situation, I can't tell anyone or get any help from my doctor because I can't 1)deal with the shame and embarrassment 2)have no one trust me.. it would break my heart. :/

    I've been on about 30mg of oxycodone a day (give or take a little more or less)

    My biggest obstacle is how anxious I feel without them.. I have really bad anxiety problems for one, and I just love being downed.. I NEED to be downed. I refuse to get on any antidepressants though. I do get 5, 0.5 lorazepam every couple months, and I don't abuse them. They make me feel awful and I hate them.

  9. #9
    Ggeo is offline Member
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    Default Hi

    Well 30mgs of Oxy is not an enormous habit that's for sure. How long have you been using?

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