25 Dec 2011
you are in a very similar situation as I. Nobody to talk to about this, except, thank God, my insurance affords me a psychiatrist 3 times a week for now, until stabilized... he does both pharm and talk therapy... I am very lucky to have found this, along with either a daily email or phone call... he is a special sort.
Anyhow, whoops, I guess it is human nature to want to talk about ourselves... so many of us a dying to do so , with out a forum... perhaps that is what is missing for your partner,as to why the tendency to turn to he/ she's self is happening... that's a generous stretch... but just maybe.
did that make any sense??? I have a broken keyboard, so it''s frustrating to type my thoughts ...
In my home, I have a husband, young adult and teenage children... none of them can tolerate what I feel I "endure" daily. It is very hard. Nor should they have to either... it is my job to take care of myself and get myself on proper meds and therapy to control my situation--- it IS do-able for most... but not an easy road... yes, it is lonesome, and I wish it were different here, but it's not.
I do not understand your aversion to SSRI"s or SNRI's. As most bipolars treatment at one time or another, they need to be a part of the "cocktail", which is my case now. 8 meds daily... for bipolar, panic, anxiety, mood rollercoaster: depression,mania,psychotic thoughts... you name it.
I take: mood stabilizer, benzos, anti-psychotic, SSRI, suboxone (drug treatment for opiate dep.)and in some of those classes of med ; two types... whatever it takes.
It took a very long time to find the right mix... two years of being diagnosed at age 48--- I have JUST started to become stable. Adding Latuda to my mix has made all the difference in the world.
Just remember, do not loose patience. I am assuming you can get yourself to a local clinic , if no insurance, and begin to get treated.
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS ... FOR YOURSELF!!!
This disease, I could not imagine treating myself... that's how I got addicted to opiates--- self medicating... years before that--- drinking--- always something, until I sought a PSYCHIATRIST-not just therapist--- and received proper meds ALSO.
Such a lonesome place to be where you are--- hook yourself up with some online support groups OR BETTER YET, IN YOUR COMMUNITY-they are free and you can speak with "like" people... google them... go to the NAMI website--- they have a wealth of info and links.
Sorry for your pain, especially at this time of year... as the rest of the world seems so jolly for others, and not able to see any of it now.
feel free to email me directly... you can get it from my profile.
I wish you well.