Should I detox off Morphine CR and Percocet at the same time?

Dad and Jones and...

Today is day 5 and every day a little better. Symptoms will sneak up on me unexpectedly-- such as depression, that is the worse right now. I feel like NOTHING will ever bring me joy again. Not my family, my house, my activities, my friends, my spirtual life. I feel NO connection to my God. I feel so LONELY. I've only had one major craving per day-- and then I used the techniques that I read here-- one day of pills may last a lifetime of misery and the monster (thanks for that monkier, Dads) contolling me. I WANT my life back, so I am doing this.

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I took several short walks and sat outside in the beepin' cold crying for a while. I wish the weather was better and i could be outside. I live in the Northern mid-west. I would love to be weeding or doing yardwork that is mindless yet physical. I have always loved that. Don't feel like cleaning the house. No Way. That feels like picking up after other people (ahhh, which by the way it is!!! )

Still feel shaky and can't concentrate so don't think I can sit in a meeting today. Thur is my regular one and I plan to go and stay as long as I can.

Eating very little, trying to force the liquids, hot baths, ibuprophen, immodium as needed and reading the forums. You guys.

Thanks...

i am amazed at the caring that goes on in this forum... it is so beautiful to see people who dont even know each other to have such a deep concern and caring for each other..
seeking...
it is just amazing how u and i went threw this so alike... please keep faith. if u read back on what i wrote (not sure if u will even find it) but what happened to me is this depression hit at about day 5. by day 8 i seriously was going to go to the hopital to get some antidepressents. sweety... please believe me when i say that it is part of the withdrawl... it will slowly pass and by day 12 and 15 (i know right now that sounds so far away) --- but it isn't and the realistic u knows that --- u will feel so much better and the sadness and depression lifts. i think it was day 12 that i went to a meeting for the first time -- and that was after dadwatchinu had sent me a message.

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\what u are going threw is very much a physical thing --- think this way,, your body has stopped producing seritonen as normal people naturally produce, within a few days your chemicals in your brain will start doing what god put them there to do... please believe -- right now that is all u can do, and if u were like me - really that is all i needed to hear. i hit another hurdle just the other day (and i know there are many many that i will come to) - going back to work. after being off for 10 days i had this terrible fear of returning to work. i love my job and have been doing it for 20 years though i had terrible anxiety of going back without pills. when u get to this point we'll talk if you need to --- and i know in my heart that u will get there just we are all different and maybe it wont be as hard for u to get back to what i call *real life*--
anyway u keep going. i pray for u and for dadwatch... and his son.
my thoughts lately have been many but this one has been on my mind a great deal "i am choosing my behaviours by first knowing the consequences to those behaviours" --- in other words if i choose to put another pill in my mouth then at that moment i am choosing to go threw the withdrawl that i have just put my poor body threw... in no way is that one pill worthy of the pain i felt... gods blessing every minute to u and your partner..

Ahhh my sweet babies... I am so very proud of you! You are all doing so good, and I dont go around passing out compliments just for fun, I really truely mean it. You are actually fighting the war on drugs from your living room every minute of every day and God Bless You ... YOU ARE WINNING! I had my daughters partner tell me the other day he thought maybe he needed just some valium or antidepressants to settle him down... and I gently pulled him aside and explained... "Honey you are doing well... pls dont mess up now, all the answers to all of your issues ARE NOT IN THE BOTTOM OF A BOTTLE DEAR. Just like our sweet warrior explained the seratonin (spelled wrong - tired 2nite) takes a long time to get back to normal... little by little, but it will... just give it time... I promise you it will happen. You are both at a crucial point of recovery, so far, yet so far to go... you have climbed a giant ladder and the top is near so please savor the moment you reach the top...

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fight that monster chasing you... you are stronger than that creature after you, I can tell by the heart I feel in your words, we are in this together. I will not abandon you, judge you, or quite praying for you, if you stumble ... I will pray you back up. I believe in you and not the monster after you. God bless you sweet babies and keep the faith, not just the faith in the Lord, but the faith in yourself, others have beaten that out of you and you have beaten yourself up long enough, forgive yourself and look toward your future. Good health & God Bless... Momma Nancy... DadsWatchinUwife... we work together & love u

You are all my children in Gods eyes... or our sisters & brothers however you want to think about it and I truely love you all!!! I am so grateful I have found this site, not only to seek help for my daughter but to seek to support of all of you going through the same thing & have met such wonderful loving people to share love & wisdom with!! To remind those of you who did not start with me & hubby a while back, my daughter is pregnant & on methadone as well as her fiance, we recently found out she was on heroine for 7-8 years. She is my step daughter... she went to her mom for help & she sent her to the methdone clinic, wish she had caame to use, we would have taken a different route... but here we are now, so we are doing the best we can...

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at first I was not truely honest on this site, kind of disguised a lit'l about our ages, # of kids, but that is all, but now I am okay with my friends knowing my name is Momma Nancy and I love you and seek you advice and offer all my love & prayers and have much knowledge now, I havve been going to meetings, meeting with my doc... lots of homework... and praying ... ohhhh guys do I pray, I ama praying fool !!! But I realize they have to wan the help and I do believe she dose, I am here for you... write anytime, I will respond as soon as I can... I am also ill... wont go into that... I will overcome (not drug related) thank you my sweeties ... sometimes it may be DadsWatchinU here & u will know when... Good Health God Bless... Momma Nancy

Seekin & JonesG Doing Great!! My friends day 25 and what Seeking 8-9 for you... my my my you guys rock! I wish my daughter & her fiance could be as far as you guys are, you have made the commitment to change your life and so much progress... your struggles have been on my mind everyday isn't that crazy?? Worried about a couple of strangers? Some would say that is crazy..I say that is Love..My prayers are being answered for you 2 and one day my family as well I hope. Robert sent me the Thomas recipe and I am going to keep it for my family when the baby is born so they can get off the methadone & switch to the subs... I guess that is a better choice... I am still researching... just an ole plumber and good wife by my side trying to figure what is best and still not really sure..but I am trying to understand the whole thing & be paitent. Your journey is inspiring & gives me hope although I believe methadone is harder to w/d from.

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Please continue to fight guys & girls you are so loved ... and dont worry about that darn dog hairy house, YOU are what is important... besides the dogs probably like it better that way! Good Health God Bless!

Jones Baby!

Just got on-line and read your struggle and your perseverence and you made it through last night!! Thank God!! Really proud and happy you made it through, tough cookie!! STRONG! Went to meeting today and prayed for you and Dads kids and all of us still suffering... It was a really good meeting. Saw a number of folks I know and got the love...

I hate the suffering, I hate it Jones I just hate it when I think of a quick fix... just one leads us to a million. We can never have one. NEVER. We have got to stick with this. We have to! No option!!

I imagine you live in the what? South east? With the humidity... I used to live in the South and know a little bit about humidity and body aches (nothin' like this, though!). I now live in the northern midwest and the cold temps and damp weather and LACK OF SUN get me down. The sun was out for a bit yesterday and I was outside hiking in the cold wind. Trying to tire these legs out.

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My addicted brain had a (brilliant) thought this morning that I should wait to get off opiates until the Spring when I can be outside-- long walks, hard yard work, tire my body out, but most of all SUNSHINE. I am considering buying a SAD light. Anybody have experience with one?

I am/was surprised to learn my legs bothering me like you, too. I did not know opiate detox would ache my legs so bad. 4 pm until blessed sleep comes is my hard time. I am starting to obsess about not getting to sleep at night... Last night I listened to audio book, after another hot bath I finally fell asleep. Ave. 6 hours a night which I should not complain. Every day, I am so happy when it is bed time, another day ya know? Then I'm freaked when I get in bed and the legs. Oh God, the legs are going and going.

Almost done with day 10 here. Just one more day, Jones. Take CARE of yourself!!!

It's so late at night when I get to your post... spouce asleep, daughter & fiance snoring away, sweet lit'l grandaughter sound asleep curled up nxt to mom... ahh yea my friends this gives me strength!!! I will die trying if I have to, too get them clean, it kills me to see them go to that methadone clinic every day, Dear God please get through this sweet feiends because if you fall back now you could end up in that line at that clinic spending $5200.00 a year for a dam drink to get through the day. The pill will run out one day, it will crash in on you and that monster will have you in his mist... YOU ARE ON YOUR WAY TO FEEDOM!!! I will not let you fail... I went to an alter call at my other daughters church today... (not like me) and prayed up a storm for you guys so please do not let me down. Jones..buddy you are my man! you can do it... Sweet Seeking...

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Ahhhh you dont want to let me down now girlie,,come on kiddo I'll fight that monster with you!! My own daughte is pregnant and my heart breaks everyday because she has to wait to detox for the baby to come so mentoriong you guys is so important because I really do love you. And guys please do go to some type of meeting or counselor. And the crazy legs at night guys??? Soak in HOT TUB, BATH TUBS ANYTHING it is a big help... as always... Good HEALTH & GOD BLESS... 2:30 AM cant sleep just gonna pray :-)

i think im realizing why people in na and aa have sponsers. i dont have one but may look at getting one very very soon. thank u for your prayers , i truly believe that that may be the reason that i made it threw the other day. the guy that i used to buy from called my house about 6 times - i didn't answer and finally got angry so i picked up. he was very nice of course and wanted to know how i was doing (like he really has my best interest at heart).. the reason i picked up the phone was to tell him that i couldn't talk to him anymore. though the conversation continued and i though i didnt' ask him for any - i thought of him all day. i thought of just getting three pills and having no pain and u know that whole thing. the whole - 3 pills wont get me hooked again... well this went on for hours in my head. it was a mistake to pick up the phone - i wont do that anymore, just hearing his voice makes me want them so badly and that is after being off for 32 days...

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association - i write programs (behavioural) at work for my clients and yet somehow i dont' think the rules dont apply to me. associating certain behaviours with certain people. remember the theory of ringing the bell and the dogs start to salviate... well the phone call sure made me do the very same thing... so no more.
be strong my dear friends as we have each other to be strong with us.

Hi all

I'm 2 weeks clean today. What a looooong two weeks... generally feeling better overall... sleeping is hit and miss. Legs still... this WEATHER really has me down. If the sun is out I feel better. Cravings, ummmm, hard to always be vigilant like you eloquently wrote about Jones. I'm still impatient with my family, more than necessary, or my irritability will leak out.

Going to three meetings a week, started back with Yoga meditation class...

I'm BORED and find little joy in daily life. I know that will be a key to long term recovery for me. Nothing interests me like it used to with the pills to get me "there"

Trying to stay busy but don't always care to be busy... nothing interests me, I lack motivation (classic early recovery). This problem seems to get worse in the evenings; I'm switching up my days as much as possible. If I can I go take a bath, ibuphrophen, read, make a phone call, try to pass a little time.

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I even tried to watch a little baseball with my husband last night. Sigh.

Going to go see if I can find out what is happening with Dad and Nancy.

One more day, peope!!

Peace-
RC

hi RC
how are we going to get threw this?? the last few days have been so tough. im not motivated to do anything, all i do is argue and complain to my boyfriend... i just feel misserable and dont' know how to snap myself out of it. times will get better and in my head i know this but the feelings of lonliness are so strong right now. i so so want something to make myself feel better and i just wont let myself do it but i hate this feeling of emptiness. im leaving for work in one hour - going in for a 12 hr graveyard shift where i have to pretend and put a smile on my face (who knows maybe that is what is saving me - my mom used to say fake it till u make it- who knows maybe one day i won't have to pretend to be ok)... im sounding just terrible - im sorry, i dont mean to lay this stuff on anyone.

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i just closed my eyes and prayed. god please be with both of us right now -- get us threw this minute. please give us serenity and peacfulness that we have never felt before... hey who knows RC maybe it will help.
u have a safe night, thoughts are with u.
jones

good morning nancy and dadwatchin...
nancy when u write to me it's like my mother (who died a year ago) is talking threw u --- thank u so very much, u are such a blessing to me and dadwatchin is like well like the fathers caring that ive never had before... anyway , it means so much and gives me such support.

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ive been trying different things lately, which i know to me is a really good sign -- slowly coming back to my own self (but a much healthier me -- because im really doing the work)..what i mean by new things is .. well.. like on sunday i went to church. it had been a really long time and being in a new city i go on my own but that is good. i went in and sat down and after the first hymn i broke down crying... a woman that was sitting beside put her hand on my hand. i truly believe that god is bringing the support i need into my life when i need it most - when i keep my heart open. this also showed me (when i broke down) that there is much healing that needs to be done but for the first time in many years it is happening and im not scared of it. i used to feel and then use those pills to cover the feelings and emmotions. anyway, when i started to cry my first instinct was to walk out but -- i stayed and about 15 minutes into the service the tears stopped and i felt so much better when i left. one step at a time.
what i have learnt (this may help someone out there and i pray it does, i didn't know this before) is that when we use drugs or alcohol to cover emmotions what happens is we become emmotionally frozen.. when we get off drugs well we have all that emmotional stuff to deal with that we didn't deal with before. so most people lets say would deal with things as the come up in there life ... one by one -- well when u get off drugs u have months or years of issues that have never been dealt with or felt and this at some point must be taken care of for recovery... things never just disappear... im not sure if i explained that right - i hope i did... when my mom died i just used more.. well when i got clean i then begin to deal with the feelings of her death and being alone (this is just an example)... the funny thing is that those things really aren't that difficult to deal with when we have a clear mind and an open heart... feelings wont kill us...
i better get into the shower im working days today ... u are in my prayers --- thank u for coming into my life..
xo