Hello, I am trying to help my husband who has recently been diagnosed with a type of paranoid and delusional disorder. Basically, he thinks that everyone is out to get him..including myself and has no trust in anyone, including myself. we have been married for four years now and he is in his early 50's. We just started seeing a psychiatrist and as a loving wife, what can i do to help him and what can i expect from him being on meds. the doctor is wanting to place him on something next week, is there anything that works best for his condition? Any imput would be greatly appreciated.
25 Jan 2011
Generally speaking, I've found that when you come from a perspective that is not mentally ill, I have found that it can be very difficult for those not sick to relate to the struggles that go on with the spouse on a daily basis. It took my wife two years before she could just start to grasp the idea that I was sick and not just week, and only cause we figured out a root cause partially stemming from ptsd. I don't honestly believe that she cares or understands still, but does just a bit.
I can't help but think that you listening to your husband, being sympathetic to his disease, would practically make you a saint as it's not a common trait, or at least that's what it seems. I personally do not have a paranoid and delusional disorder, and do know that this makes our situations very different, nonetheless, I can't help but feel that if you're just there for him, and are understanding of everything that he's going through, that you'd be acting a bit like a saint.
Good luck, and god bless you!
25 Jan 2011
How long has your husband been exhibiting these symptoms? Is this new?
You might want to make an appointment with a Neurologist, as there could be something physically wrong with him. A neurologist can test for things like NPH or dementia.
Don't give up hope, exhaust all avenues before letting a psychiatrist make you believe he is delusional. And if he is, there are meds out there that will work wonders for him.
Wishing you both the best,
25 Jan 2011
Once you have ruled out alcohol & or drug use, then I would just be available to him to talk and not pressure him. The psychiatrist will most likely prescribe an anti-psychotic med to get him back to reality. Usually the meds may take about 2 months to really see it they are effective. Sometimes it can be shorter than that. The meds should calm him down, diminish or take away the delusional thinking and restore his functionality. Seems like Risperdal works well on delusional and paranoid thinking. Everyone has different reactions to these potent meds, so good luck. Don't get caught up in the disease. You'll never beat it. Just be there for him even though his actions are hard to take. You are not alone.
25 Jan 2011
I think the advice jk is giving you despite what medication they give him will be of tremendous help, I could not have said it better caringsonbj
he has been there and done that so when you walk in those shoes then its easier to counsil another person about positive aspects of what you are going through
25 Jan 2011
I don't know what meds work best. I have a close family member that went through something similar and I think the best thing she did was admit to him that she had no idea what he was going through. He would get angry and yell saying you don't know what this is like. At first she would get frustrated and yell back I'm trying to understand and you don't know what it's like for me. She finally realized that wasn't working so when he would start yelling those things she would calmly say I know I don't know what it's like for you. It had a very calming affect. She kept that demeanor up untill he was on meds and much much better. Then they were able to go to counseling together where she finally was able to talk about how his ilness affected her. My advice right now is to come from a place of support make sure he gets the help and vent to your friends and on this site because untill he gets well he can't undrestand the burden that you carry as well.
Good luck. - Mel
25 Jan 2011
hello Dockanddenise, I can tell you are a strong person. It's so hard to stand by and watch a loved one suffer. you feel helpless. Thank Goodness your husband is willing to go to therapy, and try meds. My husband has OCD and anger issues, so when put together can create delusional thinking, not to the same degree you are going through, I'm just saying my prayers are with you. It took many many years to get my husband to try medication. We went with Celexa, and now he's 80% better. Yours can be too. hang in there, we are all here, keep us posted. Also what med. will he be on? I heard Abilify is a good one.
8 Jun 2011
I have just about the exact situation with my husband. He is 49 and has had delusions and paranoa most of his life. This illness gets worse with age. He also had an abusive past and does not trust anyone (he sometimes accuses me of doing things I have not done) He says he hears a voice in his head that is extremely self depricating. We have been seeing a therapist and he is starting on respertal today. We are hoping this medication will help. I will let you know if It does. I have stood by him like you do with your husband. I know how hard it can be. Just keep reminding yourself that it is in his head and will eventually level out. Be very happy that he is willing to seek help. I know I am happy that my husband recognizes what he puts me through. I will let you know how the meds work out (i pray they do) I am a bit fearful of how he will act once on his meds but I don't want him to suffer with the thoughts he has that are not real. I know it must be very hard for him to live constantly thinking everyone is out to get him so I try very hard to be supportive . Just realize that you cant fix him you can only be supportive
14 Mar 2012
So, I am looking for some type of encouragement or hope tonight and I came across these comments. Until four months ago, my husband seemed normal. He was certainly stressed, but normal. We have been married for 31 years and he is 54 years old. Since February 5th, he has "attempted" suicide twice. He had opportunity on February 5th. His latest attempt was on Saturday, I honestly feel that he wanted help. He cut himself on his wrist and on this chest. His wombs did not require stitches. He is delusional. He thinks all of our neighbors are watching him. He thinks we are being followed. He thinks that there are cameras and audio in our bedroom. I look at the man that I married and I can't find him. I am so lonely and scared. Our finances are tanking. At this time he is in a psych unit. The doctors are wanting to start shock treatments on him. Can anyone help me... help him? He was healthy until 4... short, months ago.
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