ive been with my husband for going on five years ,when i met him it was perfect at the time i was getting over a split from my oldest daughters dad who left me when i got pregnant. and well he showed up we hung out and one thing lead to another and we got together.now we have been together for about five years now and have 3 beutiful kids together.but he has this addiction thats driving us apart at first i didnt know what was going on because well i know nothing about drugs. but then i noticed him being this annoyoning person.i would wake up in the middle of the night to find him cleaning or singing and he just couldnt stay still he was jumpy all the time.he is covered in tattos so i couldnt tell if he was shooting up,but then i started finding things that well i wish i never had.i dont know what to do should i leave and watch my family fall apart or should i stick around and try to convince him to get the help that he needs.i truly love him i just cant stand him when he is high.
30 Jun 2010
Well isnt this a twist it is the total opposite in this world im the one high and my husband is fed up with me. I would say stay and talk to him about it if he is not either willing to cut down on the drugs or completly stay off your kinda at a dead end. Im telling you to not give up on him though there was obviously something in him that you loved about him or you wouldnt be there right. So im talking on his point of view dont give up on him stay but dont stay be on his side show him what he would be losing if you left him. By the way have you asked him or talked to him about this? is he spending more time on the drugs then he is the family? Im addicted to opiates but i wouldnt give up my family for that ever. Ask him that question you are asking us ask him if he chooses the drugs over the family. Just flat out ask him and see what he says.
That will be your answer or at least it will help make up your mind about going or staying. However way it goes i will pray for us all and ask god to give us the strength to do the right thing but you have to remember god chooses our path we just live it.
30 Jun 2010
dayzee85, Well my friend it comes down to what will you deal with. If I were you I would ask him, " What is more important, you and the kids or his drugs?" See what he says and decides to do and then you have to decide what you will take and then you have to make a decision to stay or go. I will be here to support you on this site but unfortunately I can't make the final decision for you please keep me updated on how things are going if you would like. But for the kids sake you need to make a decision, how old are they now? Do they know what is going on? Once you know what you will handle and what you won't that will make your decision for you. Good luck my friend, marjorie zych
1 Jul 2010
ok, there is a big difference between being addicted to opiates because of a prescription for pain, and shooting up heroin. you think (or know) that he's shooting up? whether he says "honey baby of course i choose you" or not, are you willing to put up with a man who puts needles into his arms? is that part of a healthy family? even if you think you can live with his quirks and annoyances for the sake of your love for him and a happy family, does that type of person resemble someone who is a part of a happy family?? if there is any chance for help for your relationship, your marriage, or your family, he needs to get off the drugs. you need help from an outside source.
dont even try to handle this alone!!! can anyone in your family or his family help? do you trust anyone of your freinds? interventions work! something has to change!! dont sit there and let the days go by by saying to yourself that your willing to put up with this!! he could die!! its only going to get worse i promise you that. get him help TODAY, or GET OUT. since i assume you love him and dont want to get out (which is perfectly understandable, i would feel the same!) then you need to get help in helping him. dont do it alone, ok? no one is strong enough to bring someone from the brink of addiction bby themselves. God bless you and stay strong.
1 Jul 2010
What jumped off the page at me was the part where you said you found stuff you wish you hadn't. Really? How else would you know if you hadn't found the stuff? Would you rather have never found out? Why do you think it's heroin? You said yourself you know nothing about drugs. What was it that you found? Powder, syringes, burnt spoons? Blackish-like tar balls? Brownish little baggies? Without more info, you may be jumping to conclusions about it being heroin. And naturally, anybody who is asked what do you want, "your family or the drugs", of course they will say family. THEN comes the hard part, getting him to admit he has a problem, that he wants help with his problem, and that he is willing to do whatever it takes to keep his family. If you could give a few details as to why you think it's heroin, what "items" you found, we may be able to pull all our thoughts and experiences together and get you the real support and help you need!
My very best to you,
23 May 2012
Dayzee85... What has happened w your husband. I'm going through the same thing with my husband. Hes very addicted to heroin. Promises all the time to stop, never does. Yesterday was my birthday he begged me for money to buy me a present that he needed extra money and he never bought me anything and then i caught him shooting up. I have him scheduled for today to get bloodwork and hair sample so he can go into a program/rehab but he JUST used. I don't think he will stop. We just had a baby four months ago. He's removed from the house but since he left he is worse bc i can't keep tabs on him. I don't want to anymore. I'm exhausted. Sometimes I wish he would just overdose so I don't have to deal with him and his abuse when he's high. I'm afraid for my baby. He's not allowed to be left alone with her. So I want to ask you, did your husband ever stop? thanks! hope he did
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