My wife has a brain injury, her ability to follow simple instructions is impaired, any advice?

Hello tazmanbush. Life can really be a handfull, and often it seems more than we take. I can share this with you, and of course anyone else who happens to read this post. I also have memory loss, but not through a head injury, well, in some ways, it is a head injury, but one that was induced. My memory loss came through ect or electroconvulsive therapy. I rather not go into the how and where it was done, how frequent and so on and so forth. Its in so many ways, the word that I use is devastating. A good example, say reading the newspaper. I can read it, put it aside, then not long afterwards, have no memory of what was written. Much the same for posting answers here, on this site. I very much have to go back to previous posts, and reread what I've written. So, in a nutshell ha! thats me. Now what advice can I give you, no wrong word, help is a better one. Patience. As much as it might anger you, as you said, out of frustration, patience will help you to cope with her pain.

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Her being in denial is real. For your wife, that is her way, and it for her is so important to deny what has happened to her. This is her defence. She keeps what she has together, her world as she lives it. In a way, I use much the same type of methods, ways to keep it together for myself. Its difficult, often, for my family, only because I show my temper. I become angry, and they know the why, the reason, but it still hurts. Very very frustrating. Very depressing for them but also myself. Its a no winner or so it seems. Yet, they put up with me, as I put up with myself. Guilt, is a cancer. Memory loss is a cancer. Memory is precious, memory if life, memory is the ability to beable to talk,function, do this or that. Best of wishes, for you both, and you are now part of my memory.

Hello tazmanbush. Thanks for posting again. I started down here, because sometimes when I post a comment, in this case in answer to yours, it has in the past not done so, thats why I did it this way. No, you did not give me that impression, of being angry, short tempered. No, not at all. Actually, you explained yourself very well. Both the first time and the second. And we (speaking on behalf of Mary, shes a wonderfull lady, who gives of herself to so many people here) understand. I tip oy cap to you, for all the help, and I know, its a lot of hard work on your behalf, that you are giving of yourself to her. And, tazmanbush, I have two friends, one a man the other a waoman. Both severe dementia. I know, thier illness is not the same as what your girlfriend is going through yet, its the caregiving role that is much the same as yours. One of them remarked, I don't know who suffers the most, him or myself. Meaning the caregiver. Its so devastating.

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As you said in just the blink of an eye, a world is changed. It sounds perhaps ... the words, but my mother, years ago, when my father was gravely ill, would say, if I could take away your pain, if it be for only a short time, I would. And many of us here would do the same for you, give you a much deserved rest, a break, take time for yourself and regroup. best of wishes tazmanbush, very much so indeed.