hey family, ive gotten such great support here and ideas from everyone of you that i take to heart and note it down and try. lately, i have found myself in a very depressed state in my life, crying, withdrawing from everyone, feelings of despair, hopelessness, sadness, loneliness and the list is ugly and goes on. my panic attacks and anxiety is at a point where its uncontrolable for me, i hate it and dont know how or what to do. i am on prozac 40 mg, an xanax half mg 2x a day for anxiety/panic. i find myself not comming out of my room for the last 3 days, just laying there mot knowing how to feel. its a real lonely place there. does anyone whos on an opiate taper or has successfully been thu one know if all of my feelings and struggles is a part of the taper process? and what did you do to help the feelings? and how long did it all last? and thor, is it at a spot where i should drop another pill? what do you think? where should i be or should i have already have been under 12 pills. i could also use some prayers family for strenght. well ill be back with more of updates hopefully today i wont be too withdrawn. by the way its 226 am hawaii time, does anyone know how long does this sleep deprivation and gosh awefull pattern stop? thanks all, leanne
Responses (4)
5 Feb 2012
Hi Leanne,
All the bad feelings are part of the detox process, yes. They are not permanent. Someone else told me when I did this it's part of a temporary insanity. It all goes away. A female friend told me she likens it to PMS. That didn't help me much, but it might help you. She said the feelings in detox are not real, just like the feeling in PMS. But the feelings you feel are real. But they aren't your real feelings, they will go away. You have to not abide by them. Which is hard at night time. It's easier in the day. And Leanne, you're also getting hooked on Xanax. You're only supposed to take that at night, so you can sleep through the darkness. You're in detox horror land, and you have to get out.
I totally agree with you Thor, & have told Leanne this before. She is not going to make the taper at the rate she is going down. Girl, you need a new plan & fast! Talk to Patti & she will help you I guartanee she will... Mary
hey thor, i pqd you, thanks for not giving up on me, and continuing to care
5 Feb 2012
Hi dear Leanne. Oh honey, we must get you trying another path. This one is not working. I applaud you immensely for your tenacity and your commitment to get off the opiates by tapering. I could not have done it this way... but I am an addict. Still I could not have done it. As disciplined as you have been I do believe that it is time to try a new approach. I wrote you a complete post and was proofing it when my ipad battery went out and so did the post lol... so I am trying to remember all that I wrote.
thanks pup, always so supportive, all of you, i just wish i could be done and over with this and didnt have to do it while full time work , being a mother and wife, too late for that now huh? ill pq you, i need to talk
I pq'd you back. It's long. I hope you got it.
6 Feb 2012
Hey Leanne,
I know exactly what you're going through just don't give up! I suggest you tell your family what you're going through, If you havn't yet. Doing so will help with the anxiety and make things easier. I've been sober for a little over four months now. And the first step for me was coming clean to my family and girlfriend. I struggled with opiates but once I started taking suboxone everything changed. I'm down to taking just a quarter of the 8 mg a day and I'm loving my life once again. This is just a suggestion from someone who was once standing in your shoes. I Hope you figure things out!
your encouragement is appreciated, and yes my family only my husband is aware of my problem, besides my children i was abused as a child, teen and has dissasociated myself from my family many years ago. my husband dont know how to help me either. on my low days where i dont wanna get out of bed he grumbles that im in bed all day, so you see, i cant take a break from anything to do this and succeed , and to mention i work fulltime. thanks a bunch
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jscooby, yes i do agree everyone is different, addiction is no fun at all. im seriously thinking more along the lines of a detox center. that way i have nothing in my way to route to get off this crap thats ruined my life. ive failed many many attemps at tapering and its very dissapointing for me. ill be in touch