75mg Morphine Sulfate 3 times a day plus 15mg IR upto 2-4 x/day?

Added 24 Jul 2010:

To be honest and I owe honesty here - I believie he was i his rights to terminate me - by the letter of the law.
I have learned a very hard lesson here. Setting aside my reasons and state of mind - by the book he had cause to dismiss.

Here is the story wishbone:

I forgot to set up an appointment with my PCP (Ill use that instead of GP) My wife was going on a trip to New York to see our son graduate and there was alot of stress flying around because we do not have the money to do it but I was not going to let that keep her from going - She is Bi-Polar and suffers from Panic disrorder and Post tramtic stress from event in her deep past. Don't believie what you read about or see in movie when a woman can step thru unscathed after a bit of consuling - It is not reality .

Anyway, so I was reallty focused on her and my daughters who did not want to go because of my wifes Mother who is what I classify as a Poison person. (as an aside - we have cut off all contact with said woman since that visit because she attacked (verbally) and abused my 10 year old daughter and my 12 year old - then went after them again for "Telling on Her" by calling me. My wife handled the situation the best anyone could and she stayed with a life long friend. After all was said and done I had a really hurting pair of daughters that I had no way to get to. I have been unable to work outside the home for over ten years and I have rarely if ever before now been away from the girls.

My head was not on me - it was on them.

When they get back I noticed my med bottle and the date on it - the last time I had it filled was 05/25/10.... it was now 07/06/10 or so- so I bugged a bit I was a week late and getting desperately low on the pain meds
I called to get an appointment with my PCP and they had nothing availible till the 13th of the month. I was fine at that point took the appointment and asked to speak to the nurse line because I was going to run out of medication days before appointment - in fact I really should have already been out. (I had had an injection in my spine and so I ended up taking less than I should for the week or two the injection worked... Not on purpose but just but accident). I talked to the nurse line and let her know what was up she said she would talk with the doctor and call me back later in the day.

When I spoke with her again she let me know that the Doctor was not going to write the scripts for me until he saw me on the 13th. He had a year or so ago done that for me when there had been a scheduling problem - I was stunned and really worried. I asked her if he understood the problem that I would be out of my medicine completely for most of a week. She said yes and so the conversation went a bit as I tried to understand WHY. I began to get Very frightened I had been told that going off the meds was life threatening. I felt increasingly like the doctor did not care. I asked if there was anyway I could come in and be seen by him at the end of the day or between other appointments- just a very quick apointment- I mean he sees me every month and it takes all of 5 minutes.

She said she would call back.

She did and the doctor again refused. I asked her what I should do. I was close to tears at this point. She gave me no reply. I asked her what I should expect when the meds are gone - desperately seeking help- some compassion anything other than the stone wall I had been given- Not trying to change minds at this point just trying to figure out how not to die. I mentioned that I was told when I first went on the meds that going to the ER would be fruitless as I would be tagged as med seeking and turned away- (Is this a reality- I do not know- but that was the info I recieved from my original med provider in New york all those years ago.)
She said that I was probably right. I asked What do I do ... I was now crying- All the responcibility of my life hit me in those momments- I was thinking how can I care for my girls and my wife if I am dead. Honestly I was to that level of fear and frustration- I am by and large a dramatic person I guess I live in my imagination quite abit and am an artist, so perhaps my reaction was over blown. I then, with a broken voice having reached that point when your voice is over come with emotion said "J.C. (not using the Lords name in vain here again- I never do that -Ever and I am not sure why I did there) - I said "J.C. what do I do? What's going to happen to me." she replied coldly "Oh, you'll probably suffer some withdrawl symptoms" I begged her to tell me what those were, and she met me with cold inderference and strangely did not end the call... I was on the call with her for ten minutes by now and she was giving me no help or comfort- nothing - I almost feel like she was drawing me out - I know it sounds c razy - Again with the big imagination on my side. But why else keep me on the phone?
And here is why I was terminated. I said and I quote "What should I do- Should I seek the meds on the street " I was being sarcastistic- attempting to show her the corner I was painted into. She said "That was a stupid thing to say " with a bit of a laugh in her voice. And I said "No its not - what amI suppose to do."

Thats where the conversation ended as I realized there was no help to be had. My doctor did not care about me and was not really there to help.
Now I am sure that he has his perspective - he is a young doctor- looking to be just out and into the world as a doctor- so maybe he is just not experienced enough to have the compassion he should.

I recieved a letter stating that by Law MI doctors may terminate a patient and he has done so.

I was given my appointment on the 13th and 30day script of the meds.

I understand why I was terminated- I just dont understand why it had to go that route... the nurse gave me no direction at all- the doctor told me nothing through her. I was left on my own-

I could ramble alot about how I just dont understand why he could not open his schedule a bit to see me - He even said to me - that what would happen if he did that all the time - stacking patients at the end of the day. I stopped talking to him at that point because I could see that he held no real concern for his patients. there was alot he could have done and chose not too.
I was never a problem patient never missed appointments always on time.
It was a real reality slap to the face that my PRimary CAre Physician did not Care

Me